100 Songs, 100 Moments
by snowtigress-27
Summary: There are 100 songs on a playlist which will be used for 100 chapter titles which amounts to 100 moments between the Doctor and Rose, because everything has its time and everything ends, but some things are too good to let go. 10/Rose and sometimes 9/Rose
1. Chapter 1: All about You

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NO PART OF DOCTOR WHO. TRUST ME; IT'S A REGULAR SOURCE OF DEPRESSION.

Summary: So I decided to try something a little different. I have a playlist of one hundred songs. I'm going to alphabetically go through each song, using the title as a chapter title. The chapters pretty much have nothing to do with the songs though. The pairing will always be the Doctor and Rose, but some will have the 9th others the 10th. Anyway, I'll post hopefully one a day unless I go on vacation. If you're lucky you might get two on some days. Depends

**A/N This**_** one goes with the song **_**All about You **_**by **_**Mcfly. **_**Enjoy!**_

**All about You**

Rose sat quietly beside the Doctor, his nose pressed into a book. Her head rest lightly on his shoulder, and her hand fiddled with the button on his jacket. She glanced at the words on the page now and again, catching little of the plot, but enough to get the general idea. She found it intensely amusing that he was reading a romance, one about a girl named Rose no less. Shifting so that her head was in his lap, she stretched out her legs luxuriously. The Doctor spared her a glance, smiling fondly as their eyes met.

"Enjoying the book?" Rose asked.

"More than I thought I would," he replied, shutting the book and resting it on the arm of the couch. "What about you? I saw you reading it too."

She paused, not really having an answer. "Eh, not bad, as books go I guess. I find the author didn't quite do me justice."

The Doctor laughed, pleasing Rose to no end. She loved making him laugh, more than anything else. _Well… not more than anything else_, she thought, a tinge of pink flooding her cheeks. There was a certain someone who had that honor.

"I don't think the story's about you," the Doctor said, grinning as he ran a hand through her long hair. "After all she falls in love with a pirate."

"But if you think about it, her family died. Mine is in a parallel world," Rose points out. "And after the pirate saves her life, she travels with him. She helps him remember how to feel, and he shows her what the world…" Rose stopped as she realized her words implied so much. _After all, she falls in love with the pirate…_

The Doctor's hand stilled and it hovered just above her head, as his eyes met hers, searching for something, only she had no idea what. What did he expect to see in her eyes? And what did she see in his? Curiosity? No, more than that. Desperation? No, not quite. It was more a desire of sorts.

"I'm afraid I'm not a pirate, Rose. Never will be," he said softly, letting his hand drop down to touch her cheek. "I've no family to welcome you warmly, and I certainly don't have a missing twin brother, presumed to be dead, but… could you love me? Do you?"

"You don't know?" she whispered, sitting up. "You honestly don't know?"

"Well," the Doctor started drawing out the word. "I have a hunch."

"Rosie wasn't the only one in love. He loved her back. I'm not a tavern girl, I don't own a little kitten, and I've never even been on a ship, but I did work in a shop once upon a time. Could you love me in return? Do you?"

The Doctor cracked a smile, and Rose felt her heart leap wildly in her chest. A smile was encouraging, very much so."

"You don't know?" he repeated her words, his smile growing. "You honestly don't know?"

"Shut up," she said. "You're supposed to answer the question."

"So were you," the Doctor answered.

"What if I told you yes?" she asked, softly, dropping her gaze, not daring to watch him.

His hand was gentle as he raised her chin. His brown eyes met hers, assuring her quietly she had nothing to fear. "Then, I'd say I love you too," he murmured.

Rose smiled as her hand snaked up around his neck of its own volition. "Good, because I do Doctor, I love you."

She didn't even have time to take a deep breath before his lips were on hers. So gentle and warm, so absolutely the Doctor. In that single kiss, she could feel time stop and yet it felt as if it were racing as well. She scooted closer to him, loving the feel of his arms around her as he pulled her up against him. They leaned back into the arm of the couch, the kiss deepening, until the sound of the book crashing to the floor brought them back to reality.

Suddenly they were both laughing at nothing in particular, and Rose felt something tug at her heart. This is what she had wanted all along, not the adventures, or the aliens (though those were an added bonus), but the Doctor, _her_ Doctor.

"You never said it," Rose said, just a tad breathless.

"Said what? I love you?" the Doctor asked, his voice light and teasing.

"Yes, please." She smiled expectantly, her tongue poking out.

"I don't think I will," he kidded. "This relationship's not all about you, you know. "

"Really?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, I lied." The Doctor said, grinning absurdly once more. "I really do love you, Rose Tyler. _And_ this is all about you."

Rose laughed even as she leaned towards him again. She stopped just short of his lips, making sure her breath blew softly against his mouth. She was pleasantly surprised to feel him shiver beneath her. This could be _very _interesting. Who knew she would have this effect on him? She might just have to experiment with that. Oh yes, that would be lovely.

"Fantastic," she whispered, her lips just touching his as she spoke. Much to her delight, it had the desired effect, and he was soon kissing her really quite passionately. She sighed contentedly as they settled deeper into the couch. Things were definitely going her way now, and she decided, as the Doctor gripped her tightly, she liked it. A lot.


	2. Chapter 2: All I Ask of You

DISCLAIMER: I OWN ABSOLUTLEY NO PART OF DOCTOR WHO. ANYONE WHO'D LIKE TO GIVE IT TO ME IS MY BEST FRIEND!

**A/N **_**The song of the day is **_**All I Ask of You**_** written by **_**Andrew Lloyd Webber. **_**Oh and I forgot to say this last chapter, but bonus points to anyone who can tell me what book, Rose and the Doctor were discussing. I'll give you a hint, it's out of print now, but the author is still writing current books. Anyway, enjoy today's chapter!**_

**All I Ask of You**

The Doctor watched Rose as she paced around the kitchen, banging pots and pans down on the counters. He was hesitant to say a word, knowing from experience it was best to let her vent her anger before approaching. Still though, he hated seeing her upset, and this time he had absolutely no idea what was wrong. He had a vague feeling it was something he had done…

"Don't just stand there," Rose snapped. "You're about as inconspicuous as a pink and green elephant!"

"Er…" The Doctor stepped into the kitchen, tugging his ear nervously. "Do you want to talk about anything?"

Rose didn't even honour that by answering. The cold glare she sent him, made the Doctor want to run for his life. He had horrible feeling she was going to slap him. Gulping, he sat slowly down in the kitchen chair.

"I take it, you're angry with me?" he said.

"Brilliant, as you are, took you long enough to figure it out," She said sharply.

The Doctor hid a smile. At least she was still complimenting him. That had to count for something. "Would you like to inform me what it is I've done now?"

Rose huffed a little before turning her back on him.

"I can't apologize till I know what it is for which I'm supposed to be sorry," he pointed out, rising out of his chair. Something about this seemed too familiar, like the conversation had happened before. Strictly speaking, it had in some ways. Rose wasn't always the most pleasant person alive. But more than that, it was as if the specific problem had come up before. Suddenly, it hit him. Everything about this little argument down to the glare and everything had occurred before… shortly after their return from the "Reinette Adventure". He nearly laughed aloud as the problem unexpectedly became very clear.

"You honestly thought I was going to marry her!" He burst out before he could stop himself. He mentally slapped himself. _What a great way to make her even more mad, Doctor._

Rose flipped around, her eyes flashing and hot angry tears falling from her face. She stepped towards him, and he hastily pushed the chair between them. It was coming. She was going to slap him, he just knew it.

"Yes, I thought that," she screamed, pausing in her advance for the time being. The Doctor sighed softly in relief. "Everyone thought that, the way you were practically all over each other at dinner!"

"I all ready told you; it was an act so I could reveal her for the alien she was," the Doctor explained in what he hoped was a calm, apologetic voice. He couldn't afford to make her any angrier.

"I'm sure it didn't require the sudden engagement or the never-ending snog session," Rose complained, though to the Doctor's relief, she was sounding just a little more relaxed.

"Actually, kissing her was quite essential, because the whole time, I was slowly drawing out the alien conscious without its knowledge. It was the most efficient way. And Rose, I never intended to follow through with the marriage. I'm never doing that again, not after the last one."

"Never?" Rose asked quietly. She was upset, but now a completely different kind. The Doctor had let his mouth run away with him again.

"Well maybe not, never," he said after a moment's pause. What a fool he was. He bumbled everything, didn't he? "I mean if… oh never mind."

Rose turned away, trying to hide her slight disappointment, but the Doctor caught it anyway. How was he supposed to fix things now? He touched his breast pocket, in which resided a rather beautiful ring. He had been saving it for a special occasion, but maybe if it would make her feel better… no, a proposal deserved a least a_ little_ pomp and circumstance.

"Rose," he said softly, crossing the room to stand beside her. "Rose, I'm sorry. I really am."

"No, I'm sorry," she replied. He was quite pleased she even managed smile. "I shouldn't get jealous. I'm just your incredibly good friend, who's really more than a friend. That's all I've ever asked of you."

"Do you want more? That is to say, even more than more than friends?" the Doctor asked, stepping so he could see her warm brown eyes. Her gaze hid everything except for a single moment in which he thought he caught something so deep, so loving, and so hopeful. But it was gone before he even fully knew it was there. Still it made his heats jolt. "I mean, yeah I kiss you and you kiss me back, and occasionally we tell people we're together. I guess… do you want something more permanent?"

"I…" Rose paused, her voice seeming to catch in her throat. He slipped his hand reassuringly into hers. This seemed to encourage her and she continued. "I promised you forever. That's pretty permanent."

The Doctor laughed, squeezing her hand gently. "I never even asked for that."

"But you have it, Doctor, you have it," she whispered.

"And you, Rose? What do you have? " he asked with a tinge of sadness. "I guess that's what I really want to know. What do you want from me?"

The Doctor leaned into the palm of her hand as she brought it up to his cheek. He could hear the steady thrum of her pulse and feel her breath blowing across his face. He couldn't guess what her answer would be, but he was ready for it nonetheless. Whatever was in his power he would give to her, his sweet, _sweet_ Rose.

"All I ask of you is that you love me. Wholeheartedly. Both of them," Rose said so softly he could barely catch her words. A warm glow spread through his whole body as she spoke because this wish… this was a wish he could grant.

"I do, Rose, I do," he replied. As she reached up to kiss him, he thought of the little gift in his pocket. He smiled against her lips, knowing that someday he would give her more than just love. He would marry her and give her domestic, maybe even children, and who knew; maybe he would even find a way to give her forever. But for now love, his love, was enough.


	3. Chapter 3: All I do is Dream of You

DISCLAIMER: AS USUAL, I OWN ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING, UNLESS THE WORLD STARTS TO END. IN THAT CASE, I OWN EVERYTHING!

**A/N **_**Today's chapter, or rather yesterday's chapter, is **_**All I do is Dream of You**_** by **_**Michael Bublé. **_**I apologize that I was unable to post yesterday. I was only home for about 3 hours, and that time was spent preparing for our vacation. If all goes to plan, I should be able to post while I'm going, but I won't make any promises. Thanks for the reviews, alerts, and favorites. They're really appreciated!**_ _**This is the first chapter to feature the 9th Doctor as well as Jack. And though it centers around the Doctor and Rose I'm afraid there's no interaction between them. Ah well, enjoy it anyways.  
Oh and by the way, I might someday come back to this and change it a bit, as well as continue it a little more, and tie it into the title better. However, that probably won't happen for a while.**_

**All I do is Dream of You**

Jack woke from a particularly pleasant dream to see the Doctor leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed, and his expression murderous. Jack put on his most winning smile in hopes of softening the grouchy Time-Lord. He only received a fierce glare in return.

"Good morning, Doctor," Jack said cheerily, choosing to ignore the Doctor's bad-temper.

"It most certainly is not," he snapped. "I was minding my own business, fixing up the Tardis, when all of a sudden you start projecting a rather dirty scene featuring Rose and yourself into my head, and I had the distinct impression I was about to make an entrance."

"Oh you were actually," Jack said, smiling up at him. "I was rather disappointed you woke me up. Although, if I concentrate really hard, I can picture it all in detail without having to go to sleep."

"You're doing it again," The Doctor said, pressing his hands against his head and screwing his eyes shut. "Jack, get out of my head."

"I'm not in your head," Jack protested.

"Well your thoughts are so loud, they're literally forcing their way in. I'm surprised Rose can't hear them," The Doctor muttered angrily. "Oh, and on the subject of Rose, she's off limits."

"Why, someone have a previous claim?" Jack asked with a devious smile. He was far from clueless. He knew exactly how the Doctor felt about Rose and he was 99% sure she felt the same. He would be stupid to think he could ever come between them. He highly doubted there was anyone that could.

"Yes, actually," the Doctor said, and for a moment Jack was in shock. The Doctor had freely admitted he loved Rose! "She's got a boyfriend back home. She's entirely devoted to him."

Jack's face fell and he wanted to scream at the Doctor. When was he going to give up all ready and sweep her off her feet? Was it really so hard? Still, maybe he could work this angle a bit,bring it all back to Rose and the Doctor. If he kept it there long enough, maybe the daft old alien could figure it out.

"Entirely devoted eh?" Jack said. "I guess that explains the way she looks at you, and all the hand holding and spontaneous hugging that goes on. We all know she's claimed all ready, but not by whatever boyfriend she's left hanging."

"You're dreaming again," the Doctor said, but there was just the slightest bit of red in his cheeks that was not missed. Jack smirked to himself. A few more minutes, and he was confident, he would have the Doctor kissing Rose within the hour.

"Perhaps. What a shame though, Rose isn't in this one," Jack said, casting a sly glance at the Doctor. There it was again, that flash of red lasting less than a second. Oh, this was going to be good. "She's bound to show up sometime. She always does. Normally, she comes in wearing this toga type thing. Although every once and a while..." Jack paused as he saw the Doctor's face scrunch up again. He was starting to get the hang of this projecting thing.

"I'm leaving now," the Doctor said rather crossly. "Just don't forget what I said. Keep your hands off Rose."

"I don't know why you're so worried about me,"Jack replied in his best offended voice. "I'd be more worried about your own hands, if I were you." Jack laughed, as the Doctor stormed from the room, forcefully slamming the door. He jumped from the bed, and bounced down the hall to the door he knew belonged to Rose. He had successfully forced the Doctor to face his feelings, now it was time to help the girl. This was going to be the best matchmaking job ever! From this day on, Jack was determined to ensure the dreams _never _stopped.


	4. Chapter 4: Always

DISCLAIMER: GUESS WHAT? I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO! 

**A/N **_**So here is the actual chapter for the day. The title is **_**Always **_**by Blink 182. It's not my favorite chapter, and it was written in a hurry, but I hope you like it anyway! Actually, it's more of a temporary chapter. Soon as I can, I'll be writing a different chapter for this title, as I'm really not satisfied with what I have. Oh, and it could be both 9 or 10, but I picture it to be 10 more than 9. Reviews are cherished and loved!**_

**Always**

Rose stared out at the dying world, as the Doctor held her hand. Their latest adventure had gone terribly wrong, resulting in the destruction of the beautiful, jungle planet. Tears streaked down her cheeks, as she watched the entire planet burst into flame all at once. Beside her, the Doctor was stiff and unmoving, and she wondered if he was remembering his home planet. She squeezed his hand, offering what little comfort she could, while trying to ignore her own overwhelming feelings of grief.

"I should have saved them," he murmured. "I should have been fast enough and clever enough, to stop all this from happening."

"There was nothing more we could do," Rose said, tenderly resting her hand on his cheek. "You did your best. Sometimes... sometimes nobody, not even a great Time-Lord like you, can save the world."

The Doctor sighed softly, leaning into her hand, and she gently stroked his skin. To her surprise, he seemed to crumble, and tears found their way down his cheeks. She had never seen him cry before, not really. Certainly not as he did at that moment. She wound her arms around, him, holding him close as he let the tears fall down. He didn't make a sound, choosing instead, to continue on in silent grief. When his arms at last moved to return her embrace, Rose knew he was shutting down, closing off all the sorrowful emotions. By the time he pulled away, it was as if nothing had ever happened.

"So," he said brightly. "Where to next? We could go see Mona Lisa, and I mean the person, not the painting. I've always wanted to meet her, you know."

Rose didn't answer, she didn't even turn to face him. She had seen so many things traveling with the Doctor, but she had never seen a sight quite as rare as what she just witnessed. She had seen the Doctor at his most vulnerable point, a time when he was so lost and hurt and just needed someone by his side. She didn't know quite to think about that, but in the end she was honored that he would open up and allow her to see his pain. And now that she knew he would open up to her, she was determined to ensure, he would open up to her again, and again.

"Rose?" the Doctor asked, throwing her a worried look. "Rose, what's wrong?"

Rose shook her, head turning around to throw him a blinding smile. "Nothing," she said warmly, "Actually, it feels very right, just now."

"Good," he said with a grin before bounding across to the console.

"Doctor," she said quietly. He turned to look at her the worry returning to his face. She smiled quickly to reassure him. She was pleased that he was so anxious for her. "Next time you want to... er... just... I guess I'm trying to say, I'm here for you. Whenever you need me. I'll always be here. Always."


	5. Chapter 5: Answer

DISCLAIMER: I MAY OWN THE UNIVERSE, BUT DOCTOR WHO IS BEYOND MY REACH.

**A/N **_**The song of the day is **_**Answer**_** by **_**Sarah McLachlan. **_**This one is really short, but it's probably my favorite so far, I think. Well... I don't know. Maybe it's not my favorite, but I am very fond of it. Happy reading, happy reviewing! :-)**_

**Answer**

In school, I was never the cleverest kid, but I wasn't the dumbest either. I learned fairly quickly, but I still struggled with some things. I wasn't the prettiest, nor the ugliest, the most liked, or the most hated. I was just Rose Tyler, the average girl living an average life. I had a job, a boyfriend, and my mum. That was all my life really consisted of. At the time, I was never really unhappy with my life, but looking back I realize there was this emptiness I had never acknowledged. I suppose I put it down to hormones.

Now I know better. I felt lost, like I was searching for something, but the problem was I didn't know what it is. It was like I knew there was something more I needed, but because I had everything the average girl wants, I hadn't a clue what it was. And so it continued for years. I went about my day, living the average life, being as happy as I thought I could be, never knowing what I was missing. Until I met the Doctor.

He saved my life, not just once but time and time again, as we traveled through time and space. He showed me a world of possibilities and a better way of living. He put stars in my eyes, and singing in my heart. And from then on, the emptiness was gone. I had found the missing piece of the equation, I had lived my whole life as an average girl, and the truth was, I wasn't average. I was meant for greater things. I was meant to travel with the Doctor. And I as I traveled with him, I finally found the answer. _He _was the missing piece.


	6. Chapter 6: Apologize

DISCLAIMER: I'VE NOTHING TO MY NAME, CETAINLY NOT DOCTOR WHO

**A/N Apologize**_** by **_**One Republic**_** is our song for today. Because the last chapter was incredibly short, I decided to give you a gift of sorts and treat you to a longer chapter. May it fill you with joy and bring peace to your mind. :-) Oh and I'm terribly sorry it's late, but that's what vacation does to you. **_

**Apologize**

Rose stared at the empty white wall, her face strangely blank. It scared the Doctor, to see her so expressionless, so utterly lost. He knew she was thinking of her family, locked on the other side of the void forever. He wondered if she regretted her decision. Would she still choose him if they were to return to that moment almost a year ago? Certainly, she seemed genuinely happy as they had continued their adventures, but there was now an emptiness about her, a dark cloud of sorts. As the anniversary of Canary Wharf approached, she had become worse and worse until he was seriously worried about her health. In the end, he had a decided a trip to where it had all started would maybe do her some good.

Now as the Doctor watched her, he couldn't help but think it was perhaps the worst idea of his existence. The cold, echoing building, in all it's emptiness brought the memories rushing back. The stark wall was more imposing than ever before, and only served to bring back the pain. Yes, his choice was certainly not the wisest he had ever made.

"Will we ever see them, again?" Rose asked quietly, breaking the stillness for the first time.

The Doctor knew the answer was no, but looking at her tear filled eyes, he couldn't bring himself to utter the word. "I don't know, Rose. There's a chance the gap will open up again eventually. Maybe things will end differently next time."

"I hope so," she whispered. Rose stood in silence once again, occasionally brushing her hand forlornly across the wall. The Doctor stepped to her side, wrapping a comforting arm around her, hoping in some way to make it easier for her. He had never wanted this for her, never dreamed she might someday be just as alone in the world as he.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," He murmured against her hair. "This is all my fault."

Her arms wrapped around his wiry body, hugging him tightly as tears came more freely down her cheeks. He held her close, rubbing her back tenderly while she sobbed quietly into his shoulder. A soft hand at the back of her head, seemed to calm her the most though. Soon, her cries quieted and she allowed the Doctor to brush away the last of the tears. Her brown eyes looked into his, the pain still present, but gratitude and strength dominating her gaze. He smiled warmly, knowing she was ready to return it now.

"No one's to blame, Doctor," Rose said. "You're the one who saved their lives in the first place."

"But," he protested.

"But nothing," she said firmly, staring him down. "Don't you go dare blaming yourself for something that couldn't be stopped. Would you rather they were dead? And what about me? Would really want me dead over separation from my family?"

"No," the Doctor muttered somewhat ungraciously. "I prefer having you all very much alive."

"Good. Now how about we pop over to New Earth?" she asked throwing him her trademark grin.

"We've all ready been there," he said hesitantly.

"I haven't lost my memory," Rose retorted, tugging restlessly at his hand. "Now come on, I want to go to New Earth. I want to lie in the apple grass with you by my side, and I want the most out of my forever."

The Doctor grinned and together they took off running for the Tardis. He had feeling that this day, so horrible and painful to begin with, was going to turn out brilliantly.

* * *

The Doctor pulled away from Rose, his breath fast and uneven. Her lips were swollen, and her cheeks were ringed with pink. Their light playful banter as they laid in the grass had someone led up to him kissing her quite unexpectedly, which had then led to her kissing him back with more intensity than he knew a human could possess. He was a hard man to keep up with, what with his respiratory bypass system, but Rose had proven herself very well. Extremely well.

"What am I doing?" he whispered, suddenly frightened of all the possibilities flooding his mind.

The Doctor untangled himself from her arms and legs, and pulled farther back. His hand was in his hair, all ready messed up, courtesy of Rose. His mind was spinning as he saw their whole future together. It was bright and shining, and wonderful, but the end result... how could he stand by and watch her fade like that?

"You're apologizing," she growled, yanking him back down by his tie. "Three years. Three years I've been waiting. And now you're apologizing for making me wait."

Rose's lips were on his again, hot with unbridled passion, and he found he didn't have the will to stop her. His hands sought out her hips, as she moaned with pleasure. He couldn't fight it, not anymore, not with her. She had a point, a very good one at that. Too much time had passed all ready, and she wasn't the only one who wanted the most out of forever. So with that, he dropped the last of his barriers, the last line of defense, and pulled her tighter against him. After tonight neither of them would ever have to be alone again.

* * *

"I can't believe you didn't invite Jack to our wedding," Rose said as she entered the Tardis with the Doctor. "He's our best friend, and you didn't even ask him to come!"

"You told me you only wanted your family and Mickey added to the list we previously made up," the Doctor replied in his own defense. "You never said anything about Jack."

"Well, excuse me for being overly excited that my family happened to pop through the void two days before my wedding! Is it really surprising I forgot to tell you I wanted Jack to come too."

She snapped, though her eyes still bright with happiness, dismissed any lasting fear the Doctor had of her truly being angry.

"You wanted me to come where?" Jack's voice came from the captain's chair.

Rose squealed with delight as she threw herself into his arms, and the Doctor watched on, trying to squelch the momentary jealousy flaming up in his chest. He was married for Rassilon's sake. There was absolutely no need to be jealous of the best friend, who accidentally wasn't invited.

"Oh, Jack," she said happily. "The Doctor and I just got married. Although, he'll have to be more careful if he plans to keep me." Here she threw the Doctor a glare that made him want to slink away shamefully. Rose kind of had that effect on people when she was angry.

Jack laughed heartily as he looked between the newly weds, assessing the very differing expressions. The Doctor was not at all pleased. Jack would not have such an easy time keeping Rose happy, as he thought he would. The Tyler temper ran just as strongly through her as it did through her mother. The Doctor had been on the receiving end of a number of slaps, especially lately.

"Oh, come on Rose. I don't want to talk to him," the Doctor grumbled, as he grasped her warm hand in his. She squeezed his hand lightly, assuring him he hadn't fallen out of her graces just yet.

"Fine, I suppose he can wait for tomorrow," Rose said, and she turned to go down the hall.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked with an unsurprisingly suggestive look.

"The Doctor owes me an apology," Rose replied before promptly disappearing down the corridor with the Doctor in tow.

He flashed her a smile, which she returned slyly, as they walked towards his bedroom. Ever since the day on New Earth apologies were... well..._ interesting_.


	7. Chapter 7: At this Moment

DISCLAIMER: NOPE, I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Here's another one by **_**Michael ****Bubl****é. **_**The song is **_**At this Moment**_**. I know there are a lot of locked in a cupboard/closet stories out there, but I couldn't resist doing one of my own. :-) Hope it's okay! I kind of had troubles with the Doctor, but hopefully I caught his character all right. **_

**At This Moment**

The Doctor listened to Rose's heavy breathing which filled the small amount of space between us. Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were alight with excitement. Though her soft brown eyes were quite pretty everyday, he found the added brightness very distracting. He wondered if this was how Mr. Darcy felt.

"Did we lose it?" Rose whispered when her breath had returned.

"I don't know," he replied, cocking his head to listen. He could hear the bear-like creature snuffling along further down the corridor, but it seemed to be moving farther away. "We'd better stay here at least for another minute."

The Doctor looked to Rose as he said this, noting the way her cheeks seemed redden even more. Her eyes were looking determinedly at the floor, piquing his curiosity. Was it possible she was nervous about being this close to him? He couldn't help but feel the need to experiment a bit. His curiosity demanded he see how close he could get without her breaking. He certainly didn't want to be close for his own personal reasons. Nope. That was definitely not the reason. Or so he told himself.

"Oh?" Rose asked, trying to act normal, but he could still see her embarrassment in the shuffling of her feet.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked, grinning madly at her. No doubt she was thinking he was off his rocker.

"That's what you've been meaning to ask me?" she asked incredulously. The embarrassment was starting to fade, replaced by the usual playfulness he had come to expect from her. Immediately, he felt himself deflating. This game of his would be no fun, if she stopped reacting. Pity, he might just have to up the stakes.

"Well more or less," the Doctor said, stepping even closer. He was almost touching her now. Her face betrayed nothing this time, but her breath came faster as if she were running again. Oh this was good. "Are you going to answer?"

"I'm thinking about how stupid you were to get us into this mess," Rose said. Her voice was indignant, but teasing as well. She was very good at ignoring the butterflies he knew must be blossoming in her stomach at his close proximity. Still her response was not what he wanted. He knew she was thinking about him by the wild beating of heart. Apparently, he would have to do better than that to get more of a reaction out of her.

"Liar," The Doctor said with a good natured smile. He twirled his finger in a lock of her hair, smirking inwardly as she quietly gasped and stepped back. Now they were getting somewhere.

"Oh, come on," he said, taking a step to put them as close as before, closer actually. "I won't tell anyone. You can trust me, Rose."

"I never thought I couldn't." She sounded breathy, but this time she made no move to back away. Taking it as a good sign, he lifted a hand to her shoulder, trailing his fingers down her arm.

"I think, you're thinking of me," he whispered, his lips caressing her ear as he spoke. She shivered, but she reached up to catch the hand he was bringing to her face. She twined her fingers with his, looking straight into his eyes. That was the moment, he realized his game wasn't such a game anymore. Why bother denying it now? He wanted this, wanted her. Curiosity had nothing to do with it. Well, a small part of him was dying to know what she do if he pressed her against the wall to snog her senseless, what her lips would feel like against his, what she would taste like. But that was different sort of curiosity all together. One he could barely reign in. Now that his game was finally moving forward he was afraid he would break first.

"I think you're right," Rose murmured. She kept her hand firmly tangled around his, but her free hand crept surreptitiously into his hair. _Rassilon, that felt good, _he thought, not quite daring to breath. Had he known how she would affect him, he never would have started this. The sudden buzz of electricity that ran through his body was almost impossible to ignore. All he wanted to do was hold her tight and lose himself in her arms, her eyes, her kisses, her _everything_.

"I think you should elucidate," the Doctor said, barely containing his desire to kiss her right then and there.

"Judging by your actions, you all ready know," Rose replied, smiling that brilliant smile of hers. He knew he had to be melting even as he stood there totally entranced. "What about you, Doctor. What are you thinking of?"

For the first time in centuries, the Doctor felt blood flood his cheeks. _Now? Did you have to blush right now?_ He looked once into her steady gaze and then quickly away. This was so not good. She had completely flipped the tides.

"At this moment?" he asked, trying desperately to buy his time. He couldn't very well tell her he was imaging kissing her in an entirely inappropriate way for, 'just friends'. Then again, would telling her be such a bad thing. He knew she wanted it too. Maybe telling her would push her off the edge and she'd finally break, saving him from having to. Either way, one of them was sure to do it any minute now.

Rose opened her mouth to speak, then hesitated. She glanced shyly at him before beginning. "You could always show me," she suggested.

The Doctor nodded, leaning towards her. Obviously she wasn't going to make the first move. Taking her advice wouldn't be such a bad thing anyway. Kissing her couldn't be anything but absolutely brilliant. This was Rose, after all. His lips were just barely brushing against hers, when a horrible noise erupted below them. The creature had found the central control room!

The Doctor looked irritably at the floor and then back at Rose. Ugh, the alien just _had _to choose the worst possible moment to destroy the world. Looking at Rose, he made an extremely impulsive decision. Just this once, saving the world would have to wait. Because at that moment, the Doctor was going to kiss his Rose, something he had waited for far too long.

In the end, Rose and the Doctor managed to stop the world from exploding at the very last moment, before returning home to the Tardis. And the kissing? It was _fantastic_.


	8. Chapter 8: Awake

DISCLAIMER: SO I GOT A PHONECALL THIS MORNING, AND GUESS WHAT? I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N **_**Technically, it's not Tuesday anymore, but I was busier than expected tonight. Or rather last night. :-) **__**This song is **_**Awake**_** by **_**Secondhand Serenade**_**. **__**This is one of the few songs I'm using I that **__**actually fits the Doctor and Rose. The other ones I chose just for their titles. However, even if though song fits, I didn't write the chapter to go with it. I still just went by title. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the chapter, even if it is... well you'll find out. **_

**Awake**

Rose cried out in pain, clutching her stomach, wet with blood. The Doctor cradled her, tears falling from his cheeks. She tried to keep the screams inside for his sake, but now and again she couldn't hold it in. As more blood seeped through her fingers, she knew she couldn't live much longer. She brought her hand to his face, caressing his cheek, as he looked down at her sadly.

"Hold on, Rose," he begged. "Just hold on. Jack will be here soon, just wait and see. He'll have the nanogenes, and you'll get better. _You have to get better."_

"Tell my mum," Rose whispered, barely able to speak through the pain, "Tell her I love her, and I'm sorry. And Mickey too."

"Don't give up," the Doctor said. His tears fell faster and his arms tightened around her. "Don't you dare give up. I'm not losing you, not today."

Rose smiled weakly, still brushing her fingers across his face. "I promised you forever. You'll have to take a rain check."

"No," he moaned, rocking her in his arms. "We'll have forever, but you have to hold on. Please, Rose. Don't leave me. I..."

Her finger lightly touched his lips, effectively silencing him. "Promise me, you'll move on. Find someone new."

"No," the Doctor replied, shaking his head fiercely. "I don't want someone new. I want you." His voice cracked at the last, and suddenly his tears were not so silent anymore.

He buried his head in her shoulder, and they held each other, as Rose's life was slowly slipping away. She ran a hand through his hair, and it was felt as wonderful as she had always hoped. The tears were coming for her too now. She didn't want to leave. How could she leave the Doctor? Fear filled her chest at what was to come. What if there was no life after death? And what if there was? She didn't want to live on, if he couldn't be with her. Life without the Doctor by her side, would be no life at all.

"Doctor," Rose gasped, finding it even harder to speak now. It was almost time to go. "Doctor, before I die."

"You're not going to die," he snapped vehemently, but she knew he wasn't angry with her. Inside he was screaming at the universe, the idiots who had so cleverly injured her, and perhaps himself as well.

"Yes," she said with perfect certainty, "I will die. But before I do, there's something you need to know. I love you. No matter where I go from here on out, that's never gonna change."

"I love you too," the Doctor choked out, touching her face. "I should have told you earlier. I should have..."

"None of it matters anymore," Rose said, smiling with her tongue pointing out as usual. She managed to get a twisted laugh out of him at that. _That's right, Doctor, _she thought. _Always leave 'em laughing, when you say goodbye. _

"Did I ever tell you about, Guinere?" The Doctor said, changing the subject quite abruptly.

He then continued to ramble on about the obscure planet while Rose only half listened. She smiled as she watched him, gabbing on as if nothing was wrong whatsoever. She closed her eyes, letting his voice wash over her. Was there a better way to die than this? She was with the man she loved, he loved her back, and she would die with the sound of his voice still in her ears. It was perhaps the best ending she could ever have asked for.

* * *

The Doctor sat by Rose's bedside, stroking her head softly with one hand, while the other, he laced gently around hers. Her breathing was steady and even, the most comforting sound he had ever heard. Now, he only longed for her to wake and speak to him with that sweet voice once again. Knowing how slowly humans healed, though, he was in for quite a wait.

"The Tardis was having some problems in the console room," Jack said as he entered the near silent medical bay. "You might want to check into it."

"What and let her wake up all alone?" the Doctor said, but his voice was not sharp at all as he gazed tenderly down at her still form. "The Tardis is perfectly capable of taking care of herself."

"So is Rose," Jack muttered, but he left the room almost immediately.

The Doctor barely noticed him leave as his whole attention was devoted to Rose. She had been an inch from death when Jack brought the nanogenes, but they had managed to keep her alive. The healing process could still take weeks, but at least he still had her. If he had lost her... he shook his head to rid himself of the dark thoughts that crowded in. There was no need to even think about it. She was with him, and he was never ever letting her go again. Not after today.

The hand in his started to move just a little, and the Doctor's eyes flew to Rose's face. She was blinking slowly, trying to comprehend what was going on. Her gaze was confused, at the familiar medical bay, and her eyes grew wide at the sight of him grinning before her. He leaned forward kissing her tenderly before pulling back with a soft smile.

"Welcome back, Rose."


	9. Chapter 9: Bad Day

DISCLAIMER: WHY WOULD I OWN DOCTOR WHO? I MEAN REALLY.

**A/N **_**Hello to all of you this lovely Wednesday... day. We're now through the A's. Hurrah! **_**Bad Day**_** by **_**Daniel Powter**_** is leading our B's. Hope you all enjoy it! Thanks very much for all the support by the way. It's brilliant. **_ _**  
This chapter is based loosely on a story I read once, in fact I kind of wrote it in hopes someone could direct me to that very story. I believe the story is split it into to two chapters rather than combining it in one. If someone could help that would be greatly appreciated. I'll leave a better description in a bottom A/N so as not to spoil the chapter. :-)**_

**Bad Day**

Generally a bad day for Mickey Smith consisted of being woken up rudely, an explosion of some sort at Torchwood, a lunch that tasted weeks old, his car breaking down on the way home, and the fridge being empty when he returned. However, his last bad day had been anything but the usual.

Mickey slept in, as it was a Saturday and Christmas on top of that. He visited his Gran for breakfast, which tasted about as good as breakfast could get. He watched a bit of T.V before heading out to the Tyler Mansion for lunch. It was superb, as was to be expected at the Tyler household. Even little Tony, who generally threw a fit on bad days, was well behaved. All around, it was turning out to be a nearly perfect day. So perfect, in fact, he was playing around with the idea of asking Rose out. Surely two years was long enough for her to have moved on.

Despite the perfect beginning, Mickey's day came crashing down soon after lunch. Pete, Jake and he were watching sports while Jackie, Rose and Mel, Jack's girlfriend, were chatting about who knows what. Out of nowhere, a familiar sound hit his ears, but it was a sound he had never thought to hear again. Jackie's paled and her jaw dropped in shock as she looked to him for confirmation. Rose's eyes lit up and she was on her feet before any of us could say a word. She tore out of the room, a single word finding it's way out of her throat.

"Doctor!"

Jackie followed after her daughter, though at a much slower pace, and Pete fell into step beside her. Mickey let out a sigh and trudged after them. _So much for a perfect day. _By the time they were outside, Rose was all ready tangled around the Doctor, their lips locked in a passionate kiss. The Tardis stood unassumingly on the lawn with a dark skinned woman leaning against it. Her expression was sad and almost regretful, but there was touch of happiness in her face as well. Immediately upon seeing her, Mickey knew. She was in love with the Doctor. Just as he was still hopelessly in love with Rose. For the two of them, there could never have been a worse day.

* * *

Martha was busy watching the Doctor as he moved about the Tardis, trying not to dwell on the sadness of unrequited love that was niggling at her chest. Looking at him though, she could never push away the sadness, the happiness, the want, and the love that always came when she was around him. She let out a sigh, everyday with the Doctor was both the best and worst of her life.

That particular day had been one of the better ones. The Doctor had not pulled his heartbroken recluse act, and he had even given a Martha a larger smile than usual that morning. She considered all of that to be a good sign, until she understood why he was so happy. It wasn't until the moment he shouted, "I've got it!" that she realize he had found a way back to his precious Rose.

As they shot through the vortex, Martha was left to sort out her complicated feelings. She was horribly jealous of course, but she was also insanely happy that the Doctor was finally going to be reunited with the woman he loved. She regretted that she couldn't have more time with the Doctor,but she was so relieved that she could quit trying to live up to a ghost. In the end, she settled on sad. Sadness seemed to envelope the many facets of the other emotions.

When they arrived, it was only a moment before the was a shot of pink and yellow streaking across the yard. The Doctor shot forward, catching the woman, who Martha could only guess was Rose, in his arms, laughter erupting from them both. The sheer joy splayed clearly across their faces, filled her with guilt. Who was she to stand between such love as that? Seeing the glow of happiness in their cheeks, Martha felt a touch of happiness herself. When the Doctor leaned in to capture Rose's lips, Martha felt the sadness return again, but this time it was tempered by that small bit of happiness still welling up within her. Maybe things would change and maybe this was the worst day of her life, but at least _he_ wasn't having a bad day.

* * *

**A/N **_**Alright so this story I ready, was a lot like this, except it didn't really say what Mickey and Martha were doing before hand. But it was the same basic thing of the Doctor showing up out of nowhere, and he and Rose are reunited but the how of it is never explained. It's told from Martha and Mickey's point of view just like this and I think it was from Mickey's view first but I don't know for sure. Hopefully someone know what I'm talking about and can help me out. If not, at least I can remember the story, if not find it. Thanks!**_


	10. Chapter 10: Beautiful

DISCLAIMER: WHY WOULD I OWN DOCTOR WHO? I MEAN REALLY.

**A/N **_**Our song today is **_**Beautiful**_** by **_**James Blunt. **_**It's a little on the short side, but I didn't have a whole lot of time, so you take what you get right?**_ _**  
Oh and remember the very first chapter when the Doctor and Rose are reading a book? The book is **_**Into the Wind**_** by Jean Ferris. Technically it's also **_**Song of the Sea**_** and **_**Weather the Storm**_** as well, as I used elements from all throughout the trilogy. They're very good reads if anyone cares.**_

**Beautiful**

Rose sat in a rocking chair, her happiness tainted only by the loneliness of having lost the Doctor. Nestled in her arms, was a tiny baby boy, sleeping soundly. His soft downy hair was the exact shade of brown as his father's, his eyes stolen from his mother. The beat of his double hearts filled the silence, matching Rose's single pulse in an syncopated pattern. It was almost like the days long gone by, when she and the Doctor would lie side by side. Instantly thoughts of him brought tears to her eyes. She had never once considered the possibility of raising her child on her own when she first discovered she was pregnant. Now the reality of it all stared her straight in the face. How was she ever going to manage on her own?

Luka stirred in Rose's arms, his legs stretching out underneath his fuzzy blue blanket. She pressed a kiss to his forehead, silently promising to do the best she could. She would be strong and raise their son without the Doctor. She was never going to see him again, and now was no time to cry over the fact. She had her time to grieve, but she needed to move on for the sake of her son. Her son needed her, and cliché as it sounded, she needed him. Together, they would get through this, through it all.

Eventually, Rose laid Luka down in his crib to stare sadly out the window. Outside, the night was clear as could be. Stars glittered in the sky above, and if she tried really hard, she could almost believe she were back in her home universe. A zeppelin floated into the view, ruining the picture she had begun to paint in her head. This was not home.

"Did you ever see something more beautiful than a rose?" came a voice from the doorway.

Rose squeezed her eyes shut in desperation. She thought she had moved past the hallucinations months ago. Hadn't she just decided to let him go only moments ago? Why was her mind suddenly playing tricks on her again?

"Rose," the voice came again, amusement finding it's way through despite the emotions choking his throat.

"Stop it," she said aloud, hoping to dispel the horrible dream that was all too sweet.

"Turn around," he murmured, and oh how Rose wanted to believe it.

Tears began their slow journey down her cheeks, as she shook her head. Surely the mad attack of hormones while carrying Luka should have gone by now. Why did she have to put herself through so much pain. He was gone, lost to her forever.

The floorboards creaked behind her, and for a moment Rose almost dared to hope. Could it be? Could it really be him? As soon as the thought entered her head, she banished it at once. He had said himself, it was i_mpossible_. The Doctor never said impossible unless it really truly was. But when a warm familiar hand slipped into hers, she began to feel the truth ring through her entire body. He was here, he was really here!

"Doctor?" Rose said hesitantly, as she turned to look at him. The sight of him nearly took her breath away. He was all she remembered and more.

"It's me, it really is," the Doctor whispered, staring straight into her eyes.

Her breath caught in her throat, and she could feel the sobs rising up in her throat. The Doctor had found her. Rose threw herself into his arms, laughing and crying all at once, as he wrapped her in a bone-crushing hug. Tears leaked out of his eyes as well, as he caught her head in his hands.

"You have no idea how much I missed you," the Doctor said, his voice low and full of intensity. "Everything about you. Your laugh, your smile, your compassion and kindness, your love. I've missed it all."

Rose smiled softly, resting her head against his. "Missed you too," she said simply. What more needed said.

He grinned once, before his lips were on hers. She leaned into his kiss, feather light as it was, pleading for more. He had just begun to deepen the kiss when a single cry from the crib broke them apart. She watched as he stilled, before glancing in shock at the crib. His eyes narrowed, then widened as he connected all the dots. He strode across the room to look down at the little boy that could only be his. He gripped the crib wall until his knuckles turned white, and Rose laid her hand on top of his.

"Are you angry?" Rose asked fearfully.

The Doctor looked at her in alarm, taking bother her hands in his as his eyes put her fears to rest. "Angry? That I've a child, a son by the looks of it? That you and I... that you and I could create something so... so wonderful, so new, together? No, Rose. How could I be angry?"

Rose smiled, joy filling her chest anew. In that moment, she could see their future in a blink of an eye. The three of them, together, forever. She saw the future looming ahead, and it was beautiful, absolutely beautiful.


	11. Chapter 11: Beautiful Mess

DISCLAIMER: LEAVE ME WELL ENOUGH ALONE. I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N **_**The song for today is**_**Beautiful Mess**_** by **_**Diamond Rio. **_**Again this is rather short. I seem to follow a pattern of long and getting progressively shorter. Ah, well what can I do? I hope you enjoy it in any case. I don't really know whether this is the Doctor in his Tenth or Eleventh form I suppose you can choose. Personally, I wrote it with Eleven in mind but picturing Ten. How weird is that? Review are cherished and even replied to, if you care to drop in for a few minutes. :-) You guys are awesome! Oh and thanks to Sunflashnurse for her anonymous review.  
**_

**Beautiful Mess**

It was Summer, and the Doctor leaned against the fence, watching as Jackie Tyler pushed a stroller through the park. Inside, he could just make out a baby Rose with her bright brown eyes as curious as ever. Her nose was perpetually running, mixing with the slobber leaking out of her mouth. He couldn't help but smile at the mess she was making of her face. Even as a baby, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

It was Fall, and the Doctor was back at the fence, smiling as a young Rose giggled with pure delight on the swings. Beside her, Mickey was spinning around on the swing, while Jackie watched from a wooden bench. Rose's face was smeared red with kool aid, and her hands had the sticky look of a child who got into everything. Apparently mess making was her specialty.

It was Winter, and the Doctor revisited the fence to see a twelve year old Rose and two other girls walk through the park on their way home. Behind them, a couple of boys whispered amongst themselves, before launching snowballs at the girls. Rose was the first to retaliate, a grin so like the one the Doctor had come to love crossing her face. Snow flew back and forth between the two groups until they tired. Rose's hair was horribly mussed, her cheeks red with excitement. She tried to smooth her hair down, only to succeed in creating frizzy mess with her gloves. She let a huff before smiling again. He admired her for that. She wasn't above laughing at herself.

It was Spring, and the Doctor saw Rose softly crying on the bench from his place against the fence. By her appearance he knew she would meet him soon. She looked much like the scared girl he first encountered in the basement of Henrics. Her mascara was running, leaving heavy black streaks where her tears were falling. In all the times, he had visited he had never seen her like this. Yes, she had been upset now and again, but now... He wanted nothing more than to go to her side and wipe away her tears. He had to remind himself she wouldn't recognize him. No doubt she would mistake him for a creeper and slap him straight off. Still, it hurt to see her like this. It only served to bring the memories of Bad Wolf Bay crashing around him. He left before he could see the culmination of her current mess.

It was Summer, and the Doctor was again at the fence he now considered his own. The whole day passed by without a glimpse of Rose's face. As the sun began to set, he knew he had gotten the time wrong. He must have over shot it, and landed sometime during their adventures or perhaps after. Either way, he was alone. There was no Rose with her various degrees of messiness, to lift his spirits. Dejectedly, he pushed off the fence, preparing to return to his lonely life aboard the Tardis.

It was Summer, and the Doctor caught sight of a woman running madly towards him just as he was leaving his fence. He turned towards her, shock overtaking him. It was impossible, utterly impossible. And yet, he could not deny that it was indeed Rose Tyler shooting towards him from across the park. A crazy grin lit up his face as he raced towards her. Her hair flew out behind her as she careened into his arms, an utter mess as usual.

It was Summer, and the Doctor held his Rose as their lips in a desperate kiss. It was raw and full of passion, so new, and characterized by insistent curiosity. It was messy and it was absolutely beautiful. She pulled away first and he smiled down at her brilliantly. She was home.


	12. Chapter 12: Best I Ever Had

DISCLAIMER: LEAVE ME WELL ENOUGH ALONE. I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N **_**The song is **_**Best I Ever Had **_**by **_**Vertical Horizon, **_**which I actually had a kind of difficult time with. Hopefully the chapter turned out okay, although it's not my favorite. This is another one I might come back and change. I'm hoping the next ones will be better. Which reminds me, I won't be able to post until next Friday or Saturday, sorry about that. **_

**Best I Ever Had**

Rose stared blankly at the marble counter, drumming her fingers as she waited for Shareen to show up. Her stomach growled loudly and the smell of chips was driving her mad. There was no way she could wait for her friend, who would no doubt would be hours late. The next time the waiter came around she was ordering, with or without Shareen.

"Gonna keep waiting, Rose?" Rose looked up sharply, smiling to see her favorite waiter, Charlie. He had just started working last week, but after seeing each other almost everyday, they were coming to be friends.

"Nah, just get me some chips and soda. Shareen can order when she gets here," Rose told him grinning with her tongue between her teeth. He smiled in return before going to help other customers.

Rose watched him as he walked away, her expression thoughtful. Charlie was super nice, and he was really funny at times too. His blonde hair curled around his ears and he had the most gorgeous brown eyes. By all accounts, he should have been on the top of her to-go-out-with list, and Shareen was constantly telling her to get his number. In all honesty though, Rose felt little to no attraction to him at all. Lately she had just had this restless feeling, and it was like all the guys she met were missing something.

"Can I sit here?" a bloke asked, pointing to the stool next to her.

Rose nodded, watching him out of the corner of her eye as he sat down. He was tall and skinny although he was built enough to not look like a bean. His brown hair was sticking up in the front in a way that just dared her to run her fingers through it. His pinstriped suit looked a bit mismatched with his converses, but the effect was more attractive than anything. All in all, he was a pretty good looking guy, a bit foxy, but altogether... well, Rose was pretty pleased with what she saw.

"Come here often?"she asked, trying to sound casual.

"Nope," he answered, with a slight grin. "I'm actually waiting for someone."

"Me too," Rose replied immediatley. "My mate, Shareen. She's always late though."

He chuckled a bit, nodding knowingly. "I know how that goes."

"I'm Rose, by the way," she said, extending a hand. "Rose Tyler."

"Nice to meet you, Rose Tyler," he said, and the way he said her name made her grin. It gave her the mental image of a toddler popping a sucker out of his mouth. "I'm the Doctor."

"Doctor?" Rose asked. She looked at him expectantly for further explanation.

"Just the Doctor," he replied, throwing her another smile. "Though if it bugs you terribly, I suppose you could call me John."

Rose squinched up her nose, frowning. "I've never liked the name John."

Suddenly, a loud scream came from up the street, and the Doctor leaped up from his stool.

"That's my cue to go," he explained. "Enjoy your chips, Rose Tyler."

"Wait," she called as he ran towards the door. He paused to look back at her, though his eyes darted back to the door, clearly wanting to go investigate. "Will I see you again?"

Rose never got more than a last manic grin as an answer before he hurtled out the door. She sat dumbly in her seat, fingering her chips as she continued to stare at the door. Even when Shareen came and bombarded her with questions, her eyes kept straying to the door. Somewhere out there was the Doctor, or John, or whatever his name was, and all she wanted to do was run out there and find him.

"Oi," Shareen said, waving a hand in front of Rose's face. "Did you even catch what I said?"

"I'm going to find him," Rose blurted out, not even noticing her friend's expression of shock. "I think I'm in love with a man I only just met, and I'm going to find him."

"Honey, you don't even know his name," Shareen retorted with a roll of her eyes. "How do you ever expect to find him?"

"I don't know," Rose said simply. "But I do know I'll find him."

* * *

Rose backed against the wall of Henric's basement, fear making her heart thump wildly in her chest as the living mannequins approached. They had her cornered, no doubt about it, and it was quite clear they meant to kill her. Her only regret was that being killed by shop dummies seemed a poor way to go. She snapped her eyes shut, expecting to die any minute, when a warm hand found it's way into hers. Her eyes flashed open and she looked to her side, where she was shocked to see the Doctor.

"Run!"

* * *

"I've been looking for you everywhere, ever since that night we met," Rose told the Doctor as soon as the Nestene Consciousness was defeated. "I practically pounced on this one guy wearing a pinstriped suit. He almost had me arrested."

The Doctor laughed a bit and squeezed her hand tightly wrapped around his. "Rose Tyler, attacker of plastic autons, and pinstriped men."

She laughed too, loving how natural it all came. She had a feeling traveling with this man, was going to the best thing that would ever happen to her. After just that one adventure she was all ready feeling on top of the world. Now she couldn't wait to see the entire universe with him, with the Doctor.

* * *

Rose was sitting on the captain's chair of the Tardis not long after their adventure with Charles Dickens when her phone started ringing. She glanced at the number, somewhat surprised to see it was Shareen. She was a bit reluctant to answer but in the end, she missed her friend too much to ignore her.

"Hey, Shareen," Rose greeted cheerfully.

"Where have you been?" Shareen demanded. "I haven't seen you in like two days. Don't tell me your back with Mickey again."

Rose snorted at the thought. "No, are you kidding? Actually... you remember that guy I met the other day, the one I've been looking for?"

Shareen gasped and Rose could just picture her jaw dropping. "No way! You found him! Did he ask you out?"

Rose grinned a bit, thinking how differently things had turned out than she originally planned. When she first met him, all she wanted was a few dates and maybe a boyfriend out of the deal. Instead she had found the most amazing alien known to man, who was taking her across all of time and space in exchange for a hand to hold. It wasn't what she had expected, but she wouldn't have it any other way.

"Yeah..." she said, still grinning to herself. "You could say that."

"And how was it? The date, I mean?" Shareen asked, totally in gossip mode now.

Rose smiled. "It was the best I ever had."


	13. Chapter 13:The Best is Yet to Come

DISCLAIMER: I MAY BE WATHCING DOCTOR WHO AT THE MOMENT, BUT I CERTAINLY DON'T OWN IT.

**A/N **_**The song is**_**The Best is Yet to Come **_**by **_**Asheley Harris. **_**Again, I apologize for the wait. However, I regret to inform you it might very well go the same way this week. I do have time in the evenings though, so hopefully I can continue to update. **_

**The Best is Yet to Come**

The first time it happened, the Doctor passed it off as a mistake, a freak accident. Amy had requested a surprise, and he decided to let the Tardis choose. As a rule, she would never cross his time line unless specifically told to do so. Thus, the Doctor was in complete shock when the door opened to reveal Rose Tyler, sitting on a park bench, with a look of recognition as she looked at the Tardis. Their eyes met, and he swallowed heavily. She rose with a slight smile across her face, and he found himself returning it despite the ache in his chest.

"You must be the Doctor," Rose said, looking the Tardis up and down. Her eyes were bright, and happiness bubbled in side him. This was his Rose.

"Who else owns a blue box, Rose Tyler?" he asked, grinning madly.

His use of her name made her smile grow all the more. She looked so irresistibly happy that the Doctor couldn't help but cross the distance between them to sweep her into a hug. He breathed in her sweet scent, smiling into her hair. It felt absolutely brilliant to hold her close again. Amy cleared her throat from the Tardis doorway, looking at Rose with a touch of suspicion.

The Doctor stepped back, grinning sheepishly as he turned back to his current companion. "Sorry, Amy. This is Rose Tyler," he paused for a minute in an attempt to find the correct way to describe Rose without giving things away or causing himself too much pain. "She's... she's a very dear friend of mine. Rose this is Amelia Pond."

Rose nodded to the red head, a warm smile on her face that sent the Doctor's head spinning. He hadn't seen such a kind hearted smile in a very long time.

"Lucky you, traveling with him," Rose said. "At least he takes you with you. Mine popped out to do some 'business' apparently."

The Doctor coughed nervously. He remembered that trip. He had left her at the Powell Estate without telling her the real reason. He then returned after prepping the Tardis gardens so they could have dinner together for her birthday. Knowing how upset it had made her, and yet how happy she had been in the end made the Doctor's present situation a little tricky.

Rose cast him a glance, knowing he remembered, but holding back on the questions she was dying to ask. Amy looked between them in confusion, quite obviously not following Rose's words, or their reactions.

"I hate to leave so soon, but I'm not meant to be here anyway, paradoxes and what not," The Doctor said, smashing his hands in his pockets. " The Tardis malfunctioned again."

Rose smiled fondly, and patted the exterior of the ship as she laughed a bit. "Just making sure I wasn't lonely," Rose said confidently. "I expect my Doctor will be back soon though."

"He will," the Doctor promised. "And when he does... well you'll find out."

He gave her a wink and a knowing smile before returning to the Tardis, with Amy following behind. The doors shut behind them just as the sound of another Tardis materializing hit their ears. The Doctor laughed quietly to himself, imagining the look of shock on his tenth self's face when he heard the second Tardis. They had left just in the nick of time.

* * *

When it happened a second time, The Doctor began to be just a bit edgy. The Tardis was spinning harmlessly in the vortex, minding her own business, when the ship began to shake wildly. Fearing any number of things, he quickly set about landing his precious ship to avoid further accident. By then, Amy had come running into the console room, screaming angrily. He lurched out the door, claiming to have found a brilliant new place before she could rip his head off.

Out in the street, signs of destruction were everywhere. Humanoid aliens with lilac colored skin and wings protruding from their back were frantically running in swarming mobs. Those that tried to fly above risked the chance of being shot by Rassilon knows what. He recognized the scene immediately, having been here before with none other than Rose Tyler. Beside him, Amy looked grim as she observed the choas.

"What have you done this time?"she asked, though her tone was subdued.

"I haven't done anything, although I will, or rather I will in the past," the Doctor said. His eyes searched the area, knowing Rose would pass in front of them sooner or later.

"That doesn't make sense," Amy complained.

"It makes perfect sense," he said. "Now... oh there she is. Rose!"

Amidst the crowd of purple aliens, Rose turned, her eyes blinking in recognition. She fought against the throng, as she tried to reach him. He reached out a hand to help pull her the rest of the way as he laughed aloud.

"Trouble, Rose?" the Doctor asked amusedly.

She smiled in return, shaking her blonde hair out of her eyes, as she proudly lifted the sonic screwdriver for all to see. "The Doctor sent me to find this," she explained, though it wasn't needed as he all ready knew that from having told her in the first place so long ago.

"Understandable," he said with a nod. "However, I don't remember you taking too long to find it. You were back too soon to have fought your way back through this mess. How about I give you a lift, so my memory stays true?"

Rose smiled and nodded enthusiastically. She paused for a moment as she saw Amy for the first time, unsure quite what to do. She extended a friendly hand, giving the other girl a sparkling smile. The Doctor almost laughed at Amy's uncertain gaze. They shook hands and Amy cracked a smile after a moment.

"It's good to see you again, Amy," Rose said and the Doctor was sure she wasn't faking the warmth in her voice.

"You too,"Amy replied, warming up to her almost immediately.

The Doctor grinned to himself. He had been slightly worried they would start a fight in the middle of the street. He should have known better.

"Come on you two," the Doctor prompted, pushing open the Tardis door, "We have a deadline here."

Rose and Amy followed him inside, Rose gasping in surprie. He smiled, chatting with her about the changed interior as he flew about the console, preparing for flight. Amy sat on the steps listening intently, no doubt trying to figure out just who exactly Rose Tyler was. When they arrived a little ways from the battered building where the Tenth Doctor was waiting impatiently, the Doctor gave Rose a quick hug before shewing her off.

Once she had gone, the Doctor leaned against the console sighing heavily. He ran a hand through his hair tiredly, trying to forget all the memories. Amy came to stand beside him, resting a gentle hand on his arm. He gave her a thankful look before bounding into action. It was time for another adventure!

* * *

The third time it happened, the Doctor knew it was more than just a coincidence. This time they were set to go to a a oceanic planet Psulo, only to find they had landed on Earth during the time it was stolen. Above their head where the other planets, and in the open street, people were going insane. The Doctor prayed to every deity he had ever heard of that he would not be forced to watch his painful reunion with Rose again. He doubted he could keep himself from launching himself in the way of the dalek's shot. When he saw Rose wandering alone, the heavy gun in her hands, he let out a sigh of relief.

"Hang on," Amy said, pointing to Rose. "Isn't that Rose, the girl we keep running into?"

"Yeah," the Doctor replied slowly. "Yeah it is."

He kept silent, watching Rose half hoping she would see him, half dreading the moment she would. He only hoped the Tardis knew what she was doing. If he wasn't careful, he could change everything in talking to Rose. All he had to do was warn her about the dalek lying in wait, tell her about the network, explain the reality bomb, and everything would be different. He might not even exist. If she did turn and catch sight of him, he would have to watch every word.

Unsurprisingly, Rose eventually sensed the two pairs of eyes following her. As she turned, the Doctor expected a warm smile or a a look of relief, but instead she glared as she stalked towards him. He ran a hand through his hair suddenly nervous beyond belief. Why was she angry with him?

"I know for a fact my Doctor is alive and trying to fix this problem, so what are you doing here?" she spat angrily.

The Doctor raised his hands defensively and tried to put on his meekest face. "I put in the coordinates wrong. I had no idea until I opened the door."

Rose's glare lessened but she was still quite visibly upset. He could sense Amy trying to hold in giggles. This was so not funny.

"Well, you better get out of here. We don't need crossed time-lines added to the mess," she snapped, though he noticed she couldn't meet his eyes. He knew her pain; he still felt it himself.

"Rose," the Doctor said quietly.

Rose glanced up sharply, hearing the tenderness in his voice. Their eyes met, and the last of her hostility fell as his hand cupped her cheek. Her eyes closed and a few stray tears found their way out from under her eye lids, which the Doctor was quick to wipe away. As quiet tears turned to sobs, he held her tightly, trying not to cry himself. She shook in his arms, all the emotions pent up inside sliding loose at once.

"It's going to be okay," the Doctor whispered. "You're going to find him, I promise you."

Rose nodded as she pulled away. She swiped at the last tears before he could get them. She nodded once to Amy and held the Doctor's gaze for another minute before turning to go. He felt his heart breaking all over in his chest and couldn't help but call her back again.

"Rose, wait," he called, stepping towards her.

Rose stopped in her tracks, waiting for the Doctor to catch up. As soon as he was close enough, he pulled her into a kiss. She was stunned at first but it wasn't long before she was responding tentatively. He pulled away much sooner than he wanted, but he knew he had to leave before doing something even more stupid.

Her eyes were questioning, and her brow furrowed as she looked at him. He shook his head, knowing he could never tell her why he had needed that one kiss.

"Before you go, you need to hear something," he said hurriedly. This was his one last chance, his absolution. "I love you, Rose Tyler, and he loves you too."

With that the turned back to the Tardis, not even stopping when Rose called his name. He entered the Tardis without looking back, knowing that if he did he would never be able to leave. When he was safely within his beloved ship, he sank to the floor, the tears he had tried to hold in pouring down his face. His arms wrapped around his knees as he relived every moment he had ever spent with Rose. He didn't even notice as Amy slipped inside, worry etched across his face. He had no idea how long he sat in absolute sorrow. It might have been minutes, it might have been days. All he was aware of was the aching of his chest, and he lingering feeling of her lips on his.

When he finally spoke, it was to yell angrily at the Tardis.

"What do you think you're doing," the Doctor shouted. "Did you think it would help? Did you think I would thank you and dance for joy?"

Amy watched him with fear and confusion, he could just see her out of the corner of his eye. He ignored her, too wrapped up in his anger to explain. He picked up the mallet sitting on the console, chucking it at the wall as he yelled in frustration. Just when he thought things were getting better...

_I would never intentionally hurt you, little one. _The Doctor stopped, his face falling into complete dejection. He dropped to his knees and hung his head. He knew better than to get angry with his ship. Of course she was only trying to help. _I brought you to her, because this is not the end. You will meet again. The best is yet to come._

_

* * *

_

**A/N**_** Technically that's the end but I wrote this as well. I'll throw it in for fun. Think of it as a present for being lovely patient reviewers. **_

* * *

The Doctor lifted his head, hope shining in his eyes. Could the Tardis have it right? His hearts pounded at the mere thought of having his Rose back home. However, when he thought of his twin living happily ever after with her, he felt himself deflate. How could he take that away from her?

_ He is lost. He was lost before he had even truly begun. He was only ever a half-life. I did not know. There was nothing I could do. _

The Doctor nodded, a bittersweet taste in his mouth. So Rose would return, but the cost... he dipped his head in sorrow, a tribute to the Doctor that was.


	14. Chapter 14: Breathe

DISCLAIMER: MAYBE I'LL OWN DOCTOR WHO WHEN PLASTIC SHOP DUMMIES COME TO LIFE, UNTIL THEN I HAVE FANFIC.

**A/N **_**The song is**_** Breathe **_**by **_**Taylor Swift. **_**Sorry this took me a little. I was trying to muddle my way through a different song before deciding just to throw it off the list. This one is not my favorite, however, I'm somewhat pleased so I won't be changing it. Anyway here it is. Oh and it's actually based off a of a picture my friend once drew. **_

**Breathe**

The Doctor sat in nursery of the Tardis, his head in his hands. He had never been more afraid than he was at that moment. It was not the kind of fear that heats the blood in your veins and suddenly you want to run, rather it was the fear that nags at your head and your heart and all you want is to close your eyes and wish it all away. The reason for his fear lay in a crib before him.

Gracie Bell Tyler was dying.

The Doctor watched his daughter as she lay absolutely still. Each second that passed, each slow laborious breath from her lungs, he thanked the universe for her continued existence. Though she was hooked to latest technology available, every moment was hers to fight for. Nothing could save her, but her own strength. He wished with both his hearts that he could do something, anything, to save his little girl.

"Doctor?" Rose called softly, as she padded into the room.

The Doctor turned to look at her, barely holding in the tears that threatened to fall at any moment. He watched her tired face, worn from an early labor and the very same fear that now plagued him. Her brown eyes worriedly sought out Gracie, her whole self nearly collapsing with relief to see the baby girl holding her own.

"Any change?" Rose asked, stepping farther in.

The Doctor shook his head, offering his hand to her. He felt the coldness leach away as she tightly held his hand. Together, they watched the tiny Grace fighting for her life, daring to breathe only when she did. Together, they would sit hand in hand through the long hours to come. Together, they would wait and hope, praying for another day, and another until the days turned to weeks. And together, they would some day show her the wonders of the universe.


	15. Chapter 15: Bubbly

DISCLAIMER: I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO. GIVE ME A BREAK.

**A/N ****Bubbly **_**by **_**Colbie Caillat **_**is our song on this wonderful day... er, night**_**. **_**The ending kind of plays off of the End of the World. I hope you all find it enjoyable. Unfortunately, I can't answer reviews at the moment, however I promise I will answer both sets, next chapter. **_

**Bubbly**

Rose wondered the Tardis halls, poking her head in the occasional room or cupboard never stopping in one for very long. Her favorite so far was the peach colored bathroom with a tub the size of a small exercise pool. Hours and hours, passed as she explored to her hearts content, knowing full well the Doctor was too preoccupied to worry what she was doing. Pink doors, blue doors, even a door studded with diamonds, filled her view. On particular door caught her interest though. It was a plain wooden door, with a plain wooden knob, but something about it seemed to call out to her.

Rose looked up and down the hall for any sign of the Doctor before pushing open the door. The walls were a crisp white color, and the bed in the corner looked as if it had never been used. All in all, it had an empty feel all except for the desk against the far wall. Papers were scattered across it, and a few books were piled here and there. A half eaten banana rested next to what looked suspiciously like orange marmalade. However, it was none of those things that shocked Rose. No, it was the many photographs littering the desk and the floor beneath.

She picked one after the other up, recognizing herself, usually accompanied by the Doctor. Now and again, Jack or Mickey made an appearance, but without fail, she was in every single one. The very last one she picked up was particularly good. In it, the Doctor had his arm around her waist, and he was laughing hysterically as an alien tried to work the camera. He looked so young and carefree.

"I've always loved that picture," the Doctor said from behind.

Rose whipped around in shock as the picture dropped out of her grasp. Her cheeks glowed red at being caught snooping in what could only have been the Doctor's room. His warm smile soon set her to ease. He picked up the fallen photograph, not seeming to mind the invasion at all.

"You looked absolutely beautiful that day," he continued, his eyes gazing thoughtfully at the picture. "More so even than your usual."

"Doctor?" Rose asked hesitantly. This was a side of the Doctor she rarely saw. Quiet, and reminiscent, he was almost romantic in the way he spoke. She didn't know what he expected her to do. The Doctor's brown eyes flicked up to her face, capturing her gaze. He too dropped the photo, and instead, he touched her cheek tentatively almost as if asking permission.

"Am I too late, Rose?" he asked quietly. "Have I waited too long? Or... have you known all along? Surely you must have."

Rose's breath caught in her throat, and she quite forgot how to speak. Her hand covered his, bring them both up to her cheek as she breathed in deeply. From some hidden place in her body, tingles began shooting through her. Just his hand against her face and she could feel herself falling apart.

"I love you" The Doctor whispered in her ear. Rose looked at him in surprise. Had he really just said that?

"I love you too?" And had she really just responded in kind?

The Doctor's lips were against hers, warm and gentle, but in her dreamlike state Rose could barely register it. She shivered under his touch hardly knowing what to do. Somehow, she must have caught on, for soon she was kissing him back, and the world went spinning. Her knees buckled beneath her, but he caught her deftly in his arms. Her legs wrapped around him, and his locked hands supported her bum. When the need for air became apparent, Rose forced herself to pull away. Her forehead rest against his though, and he refused to let her down.

"I think you may just have found my weakness, Rose," the Doctor commented, with a laugh.

Rose laughed along, feeling her mind finally catch up with her body. Really, she would have to work on that.

"I think..." Rose paused and sniffed. "Do I smell chips? Don't tell me... you made chips for dinner!"


	16. Chapter 16: Change

DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO BBC, TRAGICALLY I'M NOT BBC.

**A/N Change **_**by **_**Taylor Swift **_**is the song used for today's title. The chapter is a little different, and it's not exactly Doctor/Rose. Well it is... but... oh you'll figure it out. Enjoy! Oh and by the way, I've decided not to post on Sundays as I will be using that day to write original work as well my Harry Potter stories. Oh and another by the way, updates should be more regular this next week, as I'm very free all day long. **_

**Change**

_Nobody understands change quite like the Doctor. His body entirely transforms on a regular basis for Rassilon's sake. A man -time lord- doesn't go through that without understanding change. His life is always moving, always in constant flux, much like time itself. Even when he was a small child change was rampant around him. It is a fact of life, one he has come to depend upon very much. Perhaps that's why loosing Rose hurt so much, because for the first time he dared hope the change would never come. _

The Doctor found he couldn't hold on to anything anymore. Everything was moving faster than the speed of light, and no matter what he did it wouldn't slow down. He was so lost. Even when Martha joined him, it wasn't the same. Everything was wrong, out of place and wrong. She gave him stability, helped him keep up with the world, but his feet were still dragging, his hearts still out of place.

Life moved forward, the changes continued. The Doctor gradually learned to hide his loneliness inside. Donna came and started recovery work on his damaged hearts. Her presence gave him the strength to continue on, despite the complete and utter pain still tearing at him. Jenny flashed through his life for one brief shining moment. She was absolutely brilliant, and for a moment he thought things would take a turn for right. Maybe, she could save him, take away the pain of the time war and of losing Rose. She was gone as soon as she had come.

Walking in a market, far away from Earth, the Doctor felt hope for just a moment. Donna had seen her... she had seen Rose! The darkness was coming but so was she. If she was there, it was worth it. The darkness did come. The daleks threatened everything, and he wondered if he was destined to lose his Rose so soon after finding her. Perhaps it would be like Jenny all over again.

Nothingness is absolute. There's no movement, no change. Change can always be relied on. The universe cannot exist without it. Was it any surprise then, that the daleks failed in there quest for nothingness?

On a little known beach off the coast of Norway, the Doctor felt his hearts breaking. Surely the universe couldn't be so cruel as to take her away again. He didn't even spend an entire day with Rose, before he was losing her again. At least she would be happy, at least she could have forever, he told himself. It didn't stop the pain.

Leaving Donna, robbing her of her memories only made things worse. His love and his friend all stolen from him in one day. He wondered what else the universe planned to take.

_Still, time moves forward and so must the Doctor as he has for centuries upon centuries. Perhaps that's why he can put on a brave face. Rose returned once, fate may see she returns again. So he continues on, watching and waiting. _

_Change happens, and nobody knows it like the Doctor. _


	17. Chapter 17: Clocks

DISCLAIMER: MAYBE WHEN SLITHEEN TAKE OVER 10 DOWNING STREET...

**A/N **_**The day's song is **_**Clocks **_**by **_**Coldplay**_**. I'm not sure I really tied the title in all that well, but I like the chapter none the less. I hope you like it! **_

**Clocks**

"_I don't want to go." said the doctor, as light began to fill his body. The clock on the console began to beep just as the light burst violently out. The regernation had started. _

* * *

The Doctor slowly came to, his thoughts gradually becoming more clear. He took stock of his body from his head down, checking for broken bones as he went. His head pounded, and his whole body ached as if he had been repeatedly smashed by a giant meat tenderizer, but over all he felt pretty good, normal even. Normal? Shouldn't he feel odd? He just regenerated. Didn't he? Then why did his body feel so familiar? Somewhere he could hear a clock ticking, which pleased him to no end that his ears still seemed to work.

"Oh, go ahead, and take your time," came a hauntingly familiar voice.

The Doctor's eyes flew open, widening in shock to see his ninth regeneration before him. There was that same old daft face with the big ears and nose, and stunning blue eyes. His arms were crossed, and he was frowning at the moment.

"What are you doing here?" the Doctor asked immediately. His voice was still the same as ever. Than he hadn't regenerated. Or had he? "What am _I_ doing here?"

Nine rolled his eyes and sauntered towards him. "You've regenerated. Now, some other form of us is in control. Meanwhile you end up here."

"Where's here," Ten asked slowly. For the first time he thought to gaze around, recognizing the library of the Tardis, except it was different... very full of light, yet strangely empty.

"This is everywhere and nowhere, the place in between, the crossroads," here Nine paused to give Ten a very weighty look. "This is where you have to make your choice. It's all very Harry Potter, really."

"Well if the next us is all ready up and running I can't very well choose to go back, now can I?" Ten retorted.

"I never said you could choose to go back," Nine said. "I never even said what the choice was."

"Nah, but you mentioned Harry Potter, implying that I could choose to go back and live or I could choose death," Ten said.

"Now, hold on a moment, you simply read more into it than I meant," Nine snapped.

"Well, then you'd better get on with it, before I start reading more," Ten replied, feeling slightly angry. Neither form was very patient, and he could feel the other wearing on him.

"The Meta-crisis, he's you. Literally. If that's what you want. You can choose to become him, or you can move on." Nine explained impatiently. "Obviously, that's the choice you have to make."

"What do you mean become him?" Ten asked, warily. "What happens to his conscious if I take over?"

"No, no, he's not a separate conscious, if you choose to be him, you'll start from the very beginning, back with the Devros fiasco. If you choose not to, I imagine he'll die," Nine said with a shrug.

Ten stared at him in shock. Really the choice was incredibly simple. He couldn't just let the human doctor die. If he died... oh, Rose. How would she ever get through that? To loose one Doctor after another. No, he could never do that to her.

"I want to go back," Ten said without hesitation.

"Thought you might," Nine said, smiling for the first time. "Take care of her." He didn't have to say who she was. They both knew. Oh, they knew.

"I will," Ten promised solemnly.

Blackness began to enveloped him, then, and the Doctor could feel himself slipping into unconsciousness again. The last thing he was aware of before the darkness completely overtook him, was the clock. Ticking, ever ticking.

* * *

The Doctor was thoroughly confused as he suddenly came back into existence. There was Donna staring wide eyed, and there was the Tardis catching on fire. He leaped into action almost immediately. Everything he did felt so weird, knowing it had happened before. Soon he would talk to himself, and the old him would have no idea it was really the future him talking, as if that made any sense. He would have to keep his mouth shut about everything, to be sure the old him, never found out that he would someday be the human doctor. Human. It was such a strange concept. His thoughts were different, and his body too. One heart. That would definitely take some getting used to.

Still that would have to wait, for now he had to concentrate on saving the world.

* * *

The Doctor caught Rose's hand in his own, watching her carefully. She had to be hurting so badly right then. Inwardly he smiled widely though. Oh he couldn't wait to tell her the truth. Come to think of it, he might as well tell her right away. Now that the old him was gone, there was no reason to hide it anymore.

"Can I tell you a secret?" the Doctor whispered, when she finally turned to look at him with those wide, mournful eyes. Her expression barely changed, but he took it as a sign to continue. "You didn't actually lose him. I'm him."

"You all ready said that," she said, sounding tired, but there was laughter beginning to creep into her eyes. So she would have accepted him anyway. That was nice to know he supposed. Still, it was much better if she knew.

"No, really," he said, grinning madly. "Three years ago, I watched you and I kiss, feeling both of my hearts break. Donna and I left, after which I removed her memories to save her life. I traveled on my own after that, saving the world from all number of things, missing you the entire time. Then I ran into a nasty fellow called the Master, and I ended up regenerating. When I woke up, though, I was naked in the Tardis, which was slowly burning up, and Donna was going crazy, and Devros was planning to destroy the Universe. And then I ended up here."

Rose looked at him as if he had gone mad, but he could just the tiniest bit of hope in her eyes. Logic told her not to believe him, but she was starting to just the same.

"I'm serious, Rose. I _am_ the Doctor that just left, except from the future," The Doctor said, squeezing her hand reassuringly.

Her gaze was skeptical, but that smile of hers was tugging at her lips. She believed him! Oh, yes she did. She might not quite know it yet, but someday, she would believe him.

* * *

Meanwhile, back on the Tardis, the Doctor sat completely alone, still horribly shattered by Donna's loss and the parting with Rose. He tried desperately not to let the tears all ready filling his eyes fall, but it was to no avail. He was alone again. All alone.

It was during this time of utter lonesomeness that the Doctor spotted a crisp white note on the captain's chair. He was stunned to see his own handwriting looking up at him.

_Doctor,_

_I know for a fact how hard things will be for you from now on, but I promise they will get better. Someday, you will see Rose again, and... well when the time comes, you'll know what I want to say, but cannot. Be careful, don't get into unnecessary trouble, and don't ever give up. Don't know why you would ever need me to tell you that, but encouragement never hurt anybody. At least not that I know of. Anyway... you'll have a good life eventually. Fantastic even._

_Love from,_

_The Doctor, or rather the the Meta-crisis, human Doctor if you prefer. _

_P.S. Just wait for the alarm clock. It all starts when the clock goes off._


	18. Chapter 18: Crazy Love

DISCLAIMER: HAH, THERE'S A LAUGH. ME, OWN DOCTOR WHO? YOU'RE INSANE

**A/N **_**The song is **_**Crazy Love**_**by **_**Michael Bublé **_**. I think he might be in the lead for must used artist so far. Anyway, sorry this was late. There was a different song before this, however it was driving me bonkers, so I threw that one out. Also this chapter is really quite long, and when I started it at 10:00 last night, I realized I'd need another day to finish it. **_

_**Oh and this breaks so many rules of cannon, I can't even count them. I don't really have an explanation for it either. Basically, whether Doomsday happened or it didn't, one way or another Rose didn't say she loved the Doctor. And I have no idea, if she got trapped, if she left, or if she traveled with the Doctor when he had Martha and Donna or what. Oh, and I don't have the slightest idea why the Doctor and Rose are hanging around Earth so much. Maybe the Tardis broke down or something. Just go with it. **_

**Crazy Love**

Martha snapped the Tardis door shut behind her, completely frustrated. Just a few feet a way, Jack and Mickey were approaching, animately talking about the match last night, and a little further off Donna was coming up the road as well. Jack paused to throw her smile, and Mickey waved his hand in greeting.

"Good Morning, Martha," Jack said spryly.

"No, it's really not," Martha replied. "Honestly, have you seen those two? They're hopeless!"

"I take it they haven't the left Planet Denial, yet?" Mickey asked, shaking his head. "Really for being a genius, the Doctor can be really thick sometimes."

"And the worse part is, everyone can see it but them. They haven't got a clue," Martha complained.

"Well, that's it then, isn't it?" Donna, said as she finally reached them. "Why don't we give them a clue? You know, a little friendly nudge in the right direction."

"Tried," Jack said. "It doesn't work."

"Oh, alright then," Donna said, dipping her head from side to side. "So it will be a little more than a nudge. More of a... shove. Yeah?"

"You're going to need a lot more than a shove to get those two going," Mickey said.

"Yeah, but it's four against two," Martha pointed out, suddenly warming up to Donna's idea. "Think of it. We could do all kinds of things. Set up a few situations, drop a word or two. Who knows, maybe our combined efforts will actually work."

"I like the way you two think," Jack said with appreciation. "I'm in. Mickey?"

"I don't know..." he said, still clearly hesitant. "I mean this is the Doctor and Rose we're talking about. They've ignored what everyone else can see for years."

"Mickey, I can't put up with them any longer," Martha began. "We've got to do _something_."

She pulled her best pleading look, knowing Mickey would always fall for it. When he groaned in defeat and threw up his hands, she laughed aloud.

"Sounds like Operation nudge-the-Doctor-and-Rose is a go."

* * *

Jack was assigned the first mission. It was simple really. He was 'the plant'. His job was to talk to both the Doctor and Rose, separately of course, and put a few ideas in their heads. Obviously, he didn't expect them to immediately drop everything to run to each other's side. He was just the groundwork, a little preparation.

"Sooo, Doctor," Jack said as he sidled up to his old friend.

They were currently in the console room, repairing a few things, while Donna and Martha where successfully distracting Rose at the shopping mall. Mickey was getting things ready for upcoming missions.

"Oh, you've got that look," the Doctor said nervously. "You're about to do something very Jack, aren't you?"

"Of course not, Doctor," Jack said soothingly. "Well not really. I thought we could talk a little."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, specifically about Rose."

"Oh."

Jack loved the look on his face at that moment. His brow was furrowed, just so, and a whirling storm was just beginning to brew in the depths of his eyes. Jealous much?

"Listen, I know you don't appreciate when your companions are in relationships as it complicates traveling and going home and what not, but... there's this guy who's absolutely perfect for Rose," Jack said. There it was again, that jealous flash in the Doctor's face.

"Why don't you tell her then, not me?" The Doctor asked rather grumpily.

"Well... cause he's not exactly human," Jack said. "But I know that's not a problem for her, because she told me she's actually quite attracted to aliens. Well human looking ones, anyway." This was followed by a brief flash of hope in the Doctor's face. Ah, so he wasn't completely oblivious.

"Once again, I think you should be having this conversation with her, as it doesn't involve me." the Doctor said, resolutely refusing to look at Jack anymore. He pretended to be preoccupied with the Tardis, but Jack knew ships, and the Doctor was not helping anything.

"Actually, it does because... well this alien is you," Jack said. He smiled to himself as the Doctor paled slightly. The sonic screwdriver clanged as it hit the console, and the Doctor seemed to get even more flustered.

"You're out of your mind, Jack," the Doctor said, after a clear moment of hesitation. "Rose is Rose and I'm... well I'm me."

"Which is why you'd be perfect for one another," Jack said earnestly. "Really, Doc, you're missing out on this."

By now the Doctor's ears were beginning to flush red, and it took him nearly a full minute to compose himself enough to answer. "Jack, don't you have work to be doing?"

With that, he collected his screwdriver and practically ran away, his face a bright cherry red. Jack smirked. Mission accomplished.

* * *

Martha quietly opened the bathroom door, careful not to make a sound as she entered the room. Luckily, Rose had the radio cranked up as loud as it would go and she was also singing at the top of her lungs. It made for a great cover as she quietly stole Rose's clothes. Mission number two was well on it's way to completion.

* * *

"Doctor!" Rose shrieked, as she walked into the library, gripping her towel tightly. "What have you done now?"

"I assure you, Rose I didn't-" he cut off abruptly when he turned to face her. Suddenly, Rose was very much aware of her bare shoulders and exposed legs. She hoped he couldn't see the blush tainting her cheeks. Maybe yelling at him, hadn't been the best idea.

"I set my clothes on the sink and now they're not there," Rose said, her voice suddenly very breathy. "What did you do to them?"

"Why would I steal your clothes?" the Doctor asked. Was she just imagining the pitchyness of his voice?

"Well it was either you or the Tardis," she continued, "and I want them back."

"Wear something else, for now," he replied, his eyes carefully focusing on her face. "I'm sure they'll turn up later."

Rose let out a growl of frustration and turned on her heel. Really, that man was far too infuriating for his own good, and that hair of his... it wasn't helping matters at all.

* * *

From behind the bookshelves, the four accomplices, looked on with glee. Things were going brilliantly well.

* * *

Mickey was in Rose's room, having a friendly chat. A pizza lay on the floor between them, and they each had a bottle of soda in their hands. He tried to hide the mischief in his eyes, even as he put mission number three into action. Hopefully, Jack was doing his part of the job, otherwise it would completely flop, and Mickey would likely be exiled.

"This is just like the old days, eh Rose?" he asked, throwing her a grin. She nodded, smiling as well.

"Except, my room was never this big back home," Rose said, looking around the room which was truthfully, quite spacious.

"Do you... do you ever miss those days?" Mickey asked, his voice quiet.

Rose frowned a bit, and he knew he was in dangerous territory. One wrong word and the entire plan could come crashing down.

"I don't mean like, _miss_ it, miss it," he said hastily. "Obviously, you're happier now, with your life in the Tardis. But what if you never met the Doctor, do wonder what your life would be like?"

"Same old life, I suppose," she started thoughtfully. "Workin' in the shop, hanging out with Shareen..."

"What about me? Do you ever wonder about us?" Mickey said, careful not to sound too hopeful or forward. He couldn't afford to upset her now.

"Mickey..." Rose said slowly, her voice gentle but firm as she shook her head.

Now, he told himself, he had to do it now. He stepped closer to her, hoping Jack would follow through. If not, he was in for the slap of his life...

* * *

Jack was in the kitchen, rooting through the fridge, the Doctor ideally pealing a banana behind him. Their conversation was revolving around various vortex manipulators, and their differing properties. The Doctor was currently gabbing on about a VM 67, when Jack cut across him.

"This kitchen is practically empty," he moaned. "When was the last time Rose went shopping?"

"I thought she went yesterday," the Doctor said, frowning a bit. He began digging through cupboards and peaked in the freezer. "Fact, I know she went yesterday. But where has all the food gone?"

Jack shrugged, feigning ignorance. Inside, he was chuckling to himself, having helped Donna take out most of the food just that morning. No doubt his team back at the hub was enjoying the spoils of this mission before it was even complete.

"I'm going to have to talk to her," the Doctor said, scratching the back of his neck. "Why would she hide the food? Oh, she just gets more confusing everyday."

With that, the Doctor set off down the halls to find Rose with Jack trailing quietly behind. He could only hope Mickey had gotten the timing right. If they were to come too early, all that surreptitiously stolen food, would have been for nothing. If they came too late... well Mickey's cheek would probably hurt for a few days, but it should still be enough to make the Doctor jealous.

"Rose, the food's gone missing," the Doctor called as he pushed open her door.

Jack watched with mirth as the Doctor's eyes widened to see Mickey kissing Rose. He could only imagine, what was going through the Time-Lord's head just then. By the looks of it, it was pure shock at least to begin with. He had no doubt the Oncoming Storm would make an appearance soon enough.

"What?" the Doctor sputtered. "What?"

Rose immediately pushed hard on Mickey's chest, forcing him back a good two or three feet. Her cheeks were bright red, and when she looked at the Doctor it only seemed to get worse.

"Are you insane!" she finally managed to yell at Mickey.

Mickey stared at his feet painting the perfect picture of a man who had just been rejected. Jack was quite proud of him. Who knew Mickey the Idiot would be such a great actor? The Doctor was still staring open mouthed at Rose, and she couldn't seem to meet his eyes. Jack wondered if either of them, had even register the fact he was looking on.

"Sorry," Mickey muttered. "I didn't mean to do that."

"Didn't mean to?" suddenly the Doctor had regained the power of speech and it was quite clear he was going to use it liberally. "You go around kissing my companion, and you don't mean to? You, Mickey, need to go back to school, as you clearly don't understand what not meaning to means!" He took a deep breath to continue on, but Rose shook her head, giving him a glare of sorts.

"Leave it, Doctor," Rose said calmly. "I'm sure, Mickey's learned his lesson. Right Mickey?"

Mickey looked up quickly, grinning broadly. "It won't happen again. Thanks, Rose."

Jack grinned as well, and Mickey hurriedly left the room before the Doctor could do anything. Together the two of them, left all ready plotting the next mission.

* * *

A month, passed, as did about 25 missions, give or take. Some had more of an effect than others, but none of them seemed to work. Finally, the four decided that the Doctor and Rose really would not be nudged. Still, they planned one last final mission.

Jack pulled some strings at Torchwood, quite easily in fact, and Donna pulled some strings with the Doctor, with much more difficulty, and voila, the last mission was ready to be launched.

Donna had insisted the Doctor take her on trip for her birthday to a planet of her own choosing, and after enough bullying he agreed. She of course chose a planet which Jack had connections on, connections the Doctor was unaware of. So it was, that normally peaceful natives chased the three of them through the jungle at Jack's request.

"Come on, Donna," The Doctor yelled as they crashed through the undergrowth. His hand was clasped tightly in Rose's but he reached out to Donna with his free hand. She pretended to reach back towards him as they ran, knowing full well she couldn't allow herself to catch up with them. After all three's a company.

With a yowl from the Doctor and a scream from Rose, they were swept up in a giant net, and as according to plan, Donna was just a few steps away from getting caught up with them.

"Doctor!" Donna shouted, hiding her laughter behind fraudulent fear.

"Run!" they yelled in unison. See they were practically made for each other.

"But..." she protested, all the while smiling to herself.

"Just go, Donna," the Doctor told her. "Get out of here, and call Jack or something."

"Donna!" Rose yelled, pointing at the natives just visible through the trees. "You have to leave now!"

Donna ran off as fast as she could, but as soon as she was out of sight, she started laughing hysterically. She was actually going to miss these missions. They were the most fun she'd had in years.

When she finally got control of herself, she carefully, doubled back to spy on the captives.

By now they were out of the net, and the natives were all pointing deadly looking spears at them. The Doctor stood protectively in front of Rose, and she clutched at his hand. She would maybe have considered that progress, but really the Doctor was protective of everyone. After a few minutes of conversation, which Donna chose not to follow, the natives bound the Doctor and Rose's hands. Clever as they were, though, they tied the two of them together. She didn't envy them. How awkward would it be to walk around tied to another person's hands?

Donna followed them to the encampment where their bound were finally cut. They were escorted to a tent of sorts to wait for whatever those natives had planned. In all reality, they were waiting for Jack to get their and 'negotiate' with the natives. She made herself comfortable just outside the tent to listen in on whatever conversations they might be having.

"Really, I fail to see how it's my fault this time," the Doctor was saying. "If it's anyone's fault its Donna's."

Needless to say, Donna was not very happy with him upon hearing that.

"How could it possibly be Donna's fault?" Rose asked. Her voice was light and playful. Still, Donna appreciated the support. She knew she had always liked Rose. "Her own birthday, ruined."

"Reminds me a bit of your birthday." From the tone of his voice, Donna knew he was smiling fondly.

"Oh, that was great," Rose said, and Donna could just imagine her warm smile in return.

"Even though the Juhu tried to blow us up?" he asked.

"Especially because of that," Rose answered softly.

Donna knew they'd be smiling those smiles they saved especially for each other, and their hands would be clasped between them or maybe even on someone's thigh. And suddenly, it occurred to Donna, maybe they didn't need a nudge. Maybe, their love was being expressed every minute of everyday. Maybe they all ready knew, simply by the moments and memories shared. Maybe, just maybe they had never needed anyone to tell them in the first place. However, she dismissed the thought on the grounds it was crazy. Nobody in real life had love like that. That was for stories and movies, but definitely not for reality.

* * *

Later that night, after Donna and company had left, Rose and the Doctor were in their room. The Doctor sat against the head board, and Rose was situated between his legs. His hands moved through her blonde hair, plaiting it into an simple braid as they talked about their day.

"How much you want to bet, the incident today was another one of their little schemes?" Rose asked, laughing aloud. "You'd think they'd give up all ready."

"What's more, you'd think they'd figure out we've been together for more than a year now," the Doctor added.

She smiled and leaned back against him, resting her head on his shoulder. He kissed her head as his arms wrapped around her.

"Still, I haven't had this much fun in a long time," the Doctor said against her hair. "Some of their tricks were really quite entertaining."

"My favorite was when that beastly woman jumped you," Rose said, giggling at the memory. He had a point,; the past month had been much too fun.

"No, no the best was when their plan back fired, and Mickey and Martha ended up being the ones to admit they were in love. I'll never forget the look on Martha's face, when he kissed her out of nowhere. That was good," the Doctor said. "Makes me wonder about Jack and Donna. Think they'll ever admit it?"

"If we can do it, so can they," she said, smiling. "It's crazy how love works, isn't? It's so different for everyone."

"I like ours the best, though." The Doctor pressed a kiss just below her ear as he said this, sending shivers through her.

"Can you keep a secret?" Rose whispered, turning so they were face to face. She kissed him softly, grinning as she pulled away. "I do too."


	19. Chapter 19: Crush

DISCLAIMER: SCHOOL IS BACK IN SESSION, BUT I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**The song is **_**Crush **_**by **_**David Archuleta**_**. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was going to update sooner. I really was. My mother grounded me from the computer for a few days, and then we went camping, and school started today. I swear I will do better this week... er... next week. I'm actually quite excited for some upcoming chapters. I've got a few ideas I'm playing around with that I think will be fun! Wish me luck!**__  
_

**Crush**

Rose settled deeper into the pillows piled high on the couch, tossing a few kernels of popcorn into her mouth. Jack was settled comfortably on the floor with his own throne of pillows, grinning his trademark grin. They were having a grand time watching movies, eating junk food, and playing foolish games. It was just like having one of her old mates around again except he was obviously a man and from the 51st century at that.

"Who was your first crush?" Jack asked

"Who was yours?" Rose countered, her tongue poking between her teeth teasingly.

Jack smiled widely. "Her name was Violet. I was seven and she was ten. She was the prettiest girl in school, and oh, didn't she know it."

Rose let out a long drawn out awww. She could just see a young Jack chasing after the queen of the playground. She could also see that very girl falling for him years later when he had grown into his charm.

"So, Rosie dear," Jack started giving her a significant look. "You've not yet said yours."

Rose pushed away the blush that threatened to flood her cheeks. She was never going to tell Jack the real truth. She didn't think it counted anyway.

"I actually was also seven," she said, grinning sheepishly. "Danny Stokes sat next to me in class, and he lived in one of the homes downstairs. We walked home together everyday. He gave me a rose on my birthday."

"How sweet," Jack said. He was grinning quite widely, but there was mischievous glint in his eyes that put Rose on edge. "But that's not the truth is it?"

This time Rose could not hide the blush any longer. She couldn't meet Jack's eyes as the blood rose to her cheeks. She stared resolutely at the fringe of the nearest pillow as she shook her head.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rose muttered.

"Oh, come on," he said. "You can tell me. Pretty please?"

"It was the Doctor," she mumbled into the pillow.

Jack sat straight up, his face alight with curiosity. "How does that work out?"

"Well I didn't know it was him at the time," Rose explained, still blushing profusely. "I do now." She paused taking a deep preparatory breath. "I was five years old. I had been playing at the park when Mickey upset me. I ran away and didn't stop running until I was thoroughly lost. I sat down and cried my little heart out in the middle of the sidewalk. I remember seeing a pair of worn converses, and when I looked up, I saw a grinning man dressed in a brown pinstriped suit, with the greatest hair. His eyes were gentle and warm as he picked me up off ground. I trusted him immediately, especially when he brought me back to familiar places. He carried me all the way back home. We talked, or rather I talked and he listened. When he did talk, I would giggle madly. He was beautiful and kind and everything I imagined a prince should be. We got back to the estate and he put me down. I hugged him tightly, and he kissed my forehead. Then he was gone. I was absolutely smitten."

"That's quite the story," Jack said, quite impressed, she was sure. "Love at first sight. I never stood a chance."

Rose tossed a pillow at his face, groaning as it soared through the air. "I should not have told you that. Don't you dare say a word to him. He probably had no idea the affect he had on a little five year old girl."

"Just as I'm sure you have no idea the affect you currently have over a 900 year old alien," Jack said slyly.

Rose felt her face flush again and she abruptly stood. "I'm going to bed," she growled, chucking another pillow in his direction.

She stalked out of the room, flipping her hair and raising her chin. She wasn't going to give Jack any satisfaction by looking doubtful or unsure. She was a considered a Goddess on many planets and in that instant she planned to play the part perfectly. Regal and indifferent, she sauntered away only to stop with a small squeal the minute she was out the door. There, leaning sheepishly against the wall, was the Doctor. She stared at him in utter mortification, knowing perfect well he had to have been eavesdropping. The waves of red running into his ears in cheeks were enough to prove that even without the awkward scratching of his neck. He had heard every word.

"Smitten, you say," the Doctor offered meekly. She stared at the floor afraid to meet his eyes and see her own scarlet face reflected in them.

"Yeah..." she said, scuffing her foot along the floor. "I was _five_, Doctor. What did you expect?" Her argument was weak; they both knew it.

"I would guess he expected you to jump him the minute he said anything, and start kissing him passionately," Jack suggested, grinning impishly.

"Stay out of this," the Doctor said, glaring at the other man.

"He doesn't understand anything less than a physical explanation," Rose said. She then shoved Jack back into the room, before slamming the door in his face. She dusted her hands of any non existent dirt they might have as she turned to the Doctor with a smile. "You were saying?"

The Doctor laughed, all awkwardness gone between them. He set off down the hall, and Rose followed after. They ended up in the kitchen, by then talking of their most recent adventure in great detail. She watched him closely as he set about making tea. He was still just as beautiful and kind as he was fifteen years ago, and she was still just as smitten. The only two differences were, they were now the best of friend and knew the other like the back of their own hands, and she was old enough now to even consider a relationship. The more she thought about, the more she realized how very right Jack was. After all, where would Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty be if they gave up on love at first sight?

"Doctor," Rose said suddenly, breaking into his ongoing monologue. "Jack said something else, you know. Something about you."

The Doctor stilled in his motions, keeping his back to her. "I wondered when you'd get to that." His hand was on his neck again, clutching it nervously. "I don't suppose you could just forget that part?"

She walked forward until she was directly behind him "No," she whispered. "Not at all."

The Doctor whipped around, not fazed at all by how close Rose was standing. In fact, the kiss he suddenly whisked her into had her convinced he hadn't minded her proximity one bit. Kissing the Doctor was even more brilliant than she expected. He was teasing yet tender, fierce and playful. He tasted of sweet peppermint and just a hint of banana. He was wonderful and new, but so familiar as well. She could kiss him forever, if not for the need to breathe. When he finally pulled away, she rested her forehead on his, gasping for breath. Oh yes, she was absolutely, without any doubt at all, smitten.


	20. Chapter 20: Cut

DISCLAIMER: NAH, DOCTOR WHO IS NOT MINE. MAYBE SOMEDAY.

**A/N Cut **_**by **_**Plumb **_**is the song I used**__**. I was excited to write this one, but it ended up quite different than what I picture. I hope you enjoy in any case. Reviews will be answered tomorrow, and any new reviews(hint, hint) will be as well. Much love and many thanks!**_

**Cut**

Rose followed after the Doctor, cursing under her breath as they pushed their way through an endless forest of rose bushes. She could feel the blood dripping down her arms from the many painful scratches from the thorns. She was falling all over herself, and she frequently had to grip the Doctor's arm when she stumbled. He laughed every time, steading her with a gentle hand before continuing on. As 'helpful' as he was, she couldn't help but resent him for dragging him here in the first place. Sure the natives were nice, but they were all together too obsessed with her blond hair, an they seemed to have it stuck in their heads that the Doctor and she were betrothed or something.

Consequently, when they finally burst the wall of thorns and bloom and she tripped again, she was far too upset, to reach out for his support. When her hands crashed into yet more thorns that littered the ground, she let out a yelp of pain and frustration. She would have sat down and cried right there if not for the said thorns. The Doctor turned to her, alarm showing in his features as he offered tried to help her up. Still upset, she pushed away his hand, the hot angry tears that had been threatening for the past half hour running like wildfire down her cheeks.

"I'm fine," Rose said, even as the blood streamed from her hands.

"Rose?" the Doctor said, his voice coated with worry. "Rose, your hands."

"Yeah, my hands" she shot back angrily. "My hands, my arms, my legs, even my face!"

The Doctor's eyes widened in sudden understanding, before softening as he reached a hand to cup her cheek.

"I didn't think," he said. "I'm in long sleeves and pants, but you..."

Rose nodded, no longer trusting her voice. The tears still fell, but the anger was slowly leaking away, as he softly caressed her cheek. Of course he had no idea. Typical Doctor.

"I'm sorry. I really am," he said earnestly. She nodded again, leaning into his touch just slightly.

"I know you are," she whispered, her voice thick. "It really wasn't your fault I wore a tank top and shorts today."

The Doctor smiled, dropping his hand and taking a step back. "That was quick. Normally, you're set on fighting for a good ten minutes."

She managed a grin even poking out of her tongue. "The natives will be just behind us. If my mum taught me one thing it was not to make a scene."

He laughed and just the sound of it made Rose feel better. She was wrong to have blamed him for her own folly.

"If it makes you feel any better, I got cut too," The Doctor said, showing her, the long ugly scratch on his left palm.

Rose grasped his hand gently, smiling while she stroked the blemished skin. He flinched slightly, whether from pain or pleasure she didn't know. Her blood was mixing with his, and it reminded her of movies she had seen growing up. With a grin, she purposely slid her larger cut against, mixing the blood even more. She didn't notice him still, nor did she notice the arrival of the natives.

"There," she said. "Now we're blood brothers."

When he stared at her in what might have been shock, she let out an exasperated sigh. "Surely you've seen movies like that? The two little boys cut themselves, and mix the blood, claiming to now be blood brothers."

The Doctor still stared at her, but his face was crinkling up in amusement. Rose had the distinct feeling he was laughing at her. She was just about to tell him off, when out of nowhere one of the native women, hugged her tightly.

"Congratulations," the older woman said, pressing a kiss to Rose's forehead. "May you have many years of love and joy."

Rose stared at her, completely stunned as she walked away. More came to take her place, and for the longest time, Rose found herself, hugging, kissing, shaking hands, and receiving many sincere offers of congratulations. The Doctor was under the same treatment and by the time the last of them had left, she was pretty sure she had figured it out.

"Did we just get married?" Rose asked, laughter pushing through.

The Doctor nodded, his grin wide and foolish. "I thought you might figure it out."

A round of laughter ensued, and soon they were leaning on each other as tears of mirth poured down their cheeks. Rose held her ribs, gasping for breath as her laughter faded to giggles, and the giggles faded to soft chuckles.

"Can you imagine my mum's face?" Rose asked. "Oh and by the way, the Doctor and I got married while we were gone. She would die!"

"So would I," the Doctor replied hastily, not faking the fear in his voice.

Rose laughed aloud, taking his arm in hers. She tugged him towards the Tardis, wanting nothing more than to heal those blasted cuts, and take a hot shower. And maybe watch a movie with the Doctor, or read, or make tea or really anything. So long as she was with the Doctor. After all, he was her newly wedded husband. She could hardly leave him on his own, now could she.


	21. Chapter 21: Dancin' in the Moonlight

DISCLAIMER: NAH, DOCTOR WHO IS NOT MINE. MAYBE SOMEDAY.

**A/N **_**So leading off our D's is **_**Dancin' in the Moonlight **_**from the soundtrack of **_**Walk to Remember**_**. First, I have to apologize(again) for my lateness. I don't even have a good excuse this time. I wasn't even in school, as it was obviously a Saturday. I hope you're not too terribly upset. If I'm late one more time this week, I give you permission to say awful things, or slap me, or whatever cruel thing you'd like to do. However, I should mention it took a lot of things for this chapter to even be here. Mainly, I had a massive argument with my mom. Anyway, be grateful for the chapter. And if I don't post for a while, you'll know why. Reviews, as I'm sure you've guessed will not be answered tonight. Tomorrow afternoon I'll try to answer all three sets, whether I post or not.**_

**Dancin' in the Moonlight**

The Doctor wandered through the reception hall, trying to fight back the wave of emotion flooding over him. All around him, people were laughing and dancing, and being entirely too happy. Everyone had a partner, and nobody was left on their own. Nobody but him. He found himself heading to a darkened balcony far above the festivities to brood in peace. He sat in the shadows, forcing away the memories pushing at him. He would not think about her, not at all. She was gone, out of reach, and remembering her silken hair and contagious smile would not bring her back.

The Doctor watched the swirl of colors beneath him, lingering on the faces of those he knew. There was Donna and Jack, locked in each others arms. He was flirting madly, and she laughed at every chance. Really, they were great together. Jack had finally found someone he loved enough to earn his fidelity, and Donna found someone who could needed her and told her everyday just how much she meant to him. They were full of fire and laughter together. A good mix to be sure.

He sighed aloud. They thought they lost Donna forever, but he and Jack had accidentally stumbled on a solution a while ago. How he wished things could have been that simple in his own life...

Sarah Jane was turning in slow circles with Peter Dalton, smiling radiantly. She hadn't looked that happy in years. That man was so, so good for her, and Luke as well. Peter had magically came back from the dead after the Tardis and Mr. Smith put their heads together, putting things back as they should be in Sarah Jane's life. More and more painful reminders hit him. He never knew happiness could hurt so much.

Cline, the guard whom they encountered while adventuring with Jenny, was crossing the room to sweep Jenny herself into a dance. Her smile was absolutely blinding, and his was very nearly just as bright. For being just friends, the two were incredibly enamored in each other. The Doctor had no doubt they would eventually admit their feelings. He could only hope they confessed before it was too late. How could he ever have been so foolish?

Jenny was yet another surprise in the sea of impossibilities that was the dance floor. He still wasn't quite sure how she had returned to him, Cline included. He was grateful everyday for the safe return of his daughter, though. Somehow it made all his pain and loss a little bit more bearable.

Also on the dance floor was the happy couple themselves, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, otherwise known as Mickey and Martha. Now that was an unexpected match. Even more so than Donna and Jack. It all made brilliant sense, though and when he thought about it, the Doctor knew they were just right for each other. They were glowing with their new found love, absolutely brimming with delight in the other's company.

For a moment the Doctor wished... he wished she could see them now. How they would laugh together over the way things turned out between everyone. Donna and Jack, Sarah Jane and Peter, Cline and Jenny(Sort of), Mickey and Martha, Jackie and Pete, who wasn't really Pete. He wondered briefly if perhaps they were dancing somewhere too. Wouldn't that just be ironic? If they were dancing, no doubt so was the Meta-crisis and... He swallowed not even trusting his thoughts with her name. Everyone was with the person they loved most tonight. Everyone, that is, but him.

"Dad?" Jenny said behind him.

The Doctor's head snapped up. He hadn't even noticed she left the floor. He met her eyes once before quickly dropping them. He didn't know if he was strong enough to have this conversation.

"What's wrong?" she asked gently. "And don't tell me nothing. I'm not stupid, In fact, I'm rather clever."

He smiled weakly. It was really all he could manage.

"Martha once told me there's someone for everyone," the Doctor murmured, barely audible in his own ears. "She said it in hopes that I would see her, but at the time she didn't realize her someone was Mickey. I'm only now beginning to understand we both had the wrong people in mind that day."

"Are you thinking of Rose?" He flinched at her name. Jenny rested a warm hand on his shoulder, taking an empty seat behind them. "Martha told me about her when I first got back. She said you loved her, but that's she with the other you."

"Yeah," he whispered. "That was her someone."

"But how do you know?" Jenny asked. "I mean what if you were wrong and he really wasn't her someone."

"He is," the Doctor answered sadly. "He's everything I ever wanted to give her, and she's everything he and I ever needed."

"Exactly. You need her too," she said with excitement in her voice. "What if you're her someone?"

"And where does that leave him?" the Doctor asked somewhat bitterly. "I can't just take that away from him. It doesn't matter anyway. The walls are sealed. We'll never see either of them again."

"I died, Doctor," she retorted, "And so did Pete and Jack at one time, and Donna was beyond reach. If you haven't noticed, nothing stays impossible around you."

A few months later, moonlight shone through the trees above, creating paths of melted silver. The Doctor danced beneath the softly glowing canopy, Rose nestled in his arms. He breathed in her sweet smell, kissing her hair and cheeks over and over again. The impossible had happened yet again. Rose was with him once more and it looked like they finally had a shot at happily ever after. Just like everyone else, including the Human Doctor. Turns out, the parallel universe did have another Rose Tyler up it's sleeve.


	22. Chapter 22: Different

DISCLAIMER: NOPE, NADA, NO, ABSOLUTLEY NOT. CAN I MAKE IT MORE CLEAR? I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N **_**The song is**_ **Different **_**by **_**Acceptance**_**. All right. Obviously, this isn't exactly on time. As I said last time, feel free to be mean now to punish me. However, as some have you may have noticed, I posted a separate one shot instead. It's entitled The Burning, if any of you would like to have a look. If you liked chapter eight of this story, you ought to like the oneshot. You have my horribly boring Computer Tech teacher to thank for it (I wrote every spare minute in that class. There were a lot of minutes, let me tell you.)**_

_**Anyway, this chapter showcases the meta-crisis Doctor. I feel like I should give just a touch of explanation. I don't hate him. At all. In fact quite the opposite. I think he gets bashed a lot unfairly. Well not bashed, but I think you catch my drift. I personally think Rose would be just as happy if not more so with him. However, I have a hard time writing about them, don't ask me why, which would explain why he has never made an appearance beyond a sentence or two so far. I plan to use him more often, but I can't promise anything brilliant. Oh and once again, I had a hard time tying in the title. Oh well.**_

**Different**

Rose pushed her hair away from her highs, growling at the papers scattered across her desk. She thought she was done with all the paperwork and reports when she started with the dimension cannon. Of course, now that she had returned to Pete's World with the human doctor, it was back to Torchwood and their ghastly reports about absolutely everything. She failed to see why they required files on all her various adventures with the Doctor anyway. Really it didn't help anything... well not very much.

A soft knock on the door, and suddenly the Doctor was bouncing into the room all grins and smiles. Really, he looked just like a kid with that popsicle grin and ridiculous (gorgeous) hair. He may have worked for Torchwood, but he was anything but a typical employee. She doubted there was anyone else that could act that foolish and not get fired. Torchwood kept him around though for his use as an encyclopedia of knowledge pertaining to aliens. He was also a fantastic field agent, and his research and experiments were beyond brilliant. (It also didn't hurt that he was dating the Head's daughter.)

"Aren't you supposed to be working?" Rose asked as the Doctor made himself comfortable on the corner of her desk.

"Nah," he replied, still grinning like a madman. "I thought I'd take my break early."

"You can't do that," she said, shaking her head incredulously. "One of these days, they'll kick you out, you know. You can't just skip work whenever you feel like it."

"Yes, I can," he answered simply. "So can you. What do you say, Rosie? Feeling adventurous?"

Rose looked at him a moment, before her face slowly worked into a smile. He was far too adorable for his own good.

"Oh, all right," she broke down, before any resistance had really even been formed. He knew only too well how utterly bored she could get.

The Doctor snatched up her hand and dragged her laughing from the room. They shot out the doors without so much a glance back.

* * *

"Think we'll get attacked by aliens?" Rose asked.

The Doctor glanced down at her in slight surprise, smiling a little at her teasing tone. Her head rested in his lap, her legs stretched out to the side. His fingers twined absently though her, his back resting easily against a tree trunk. They were on the planet Voruga, enjoying a moment alone together under the warm red sun.

"I doubt it," he replied. "This place won't be inhabited for, oh, thousand years maybe. Definitely no aliens today."

"That's what you said on that planet with liquid mountains," Rose reminded.

He laughed, remembering the fierce dragon-like creatures that had chased them all the way back to the Tardis. Now that had been one spectacular day. It wasn't long after their New Earth trip. They had still been getting used to one another, learning what was different and what was the same. His face grew thoughtful as he thought of the trip they had taken shortly after the Tardis was finished. Rose still was unsure of him at that point and they had gone through the motions of learning differences and similarities all over again. In the end, he had found himself kissing her for all he was worth. Adventures tended to end that way these days. It was difference he found entirely... well anyway.

"What are you thinking of?" Rose asked, cutting into his thoughts.

He brushed a hand up and down her jaw, his smile returning. "You."

"Yeah?"

"Yes."

Rose's smile in return was blindingly beautiful, and the Doctor swooped in to kiss her. As her lips moved against his, he wondered how he could ever have been such an idiot to hold back on her. He kissed her neck, and face, his tongue flicking out to caress her skin as she giggled.

"Doctor," she said, laughing loudly. "What do you think you're doing?"

"What does it look like?" He murmured against her throat.

Rose's hands pushed through his hair, sending tingles down his spine. She kissed his lips gently, but she pulled away, before he could even taste her properly.

"It looks like your going to make me late for work again," Rose retorted, moving to stand.

The Doctor grabbed her hand, pulling her back down. His lips descended to prevent any protest from spilling from her mouth. She was stiff against him to begin with, but after a moment, she relented, responding to the kiss. When his lungs screamed for oxygen, he pulled away, keeping Rose locked in his arms.

"Rose, I have a time machine," he said.

She smiled, kissing him again.

"I always knew you were good for something."


	23. Chapter 23: Don't Stop Dancing

DISCLAIMER: YEP, STILL DON'T GOT IT.

**A/N Don't Stop Dancing **_**by **_**Creed **_**is the song that took me so long. As you can see, updates have not been coming everyday anymore. Well, they haven't for a long time. Anyway, I'm now going to drop that expectation. I will still try and update everyday if I can, but I have musical practice everyday after school now which complicates the matter. I should be able to promise with a clear conscious that I will post at least twice a week. I do apologize, but be grateful you're not a reader of my Harry Potter story, it hardly ever gets updated. **_

_**It's a bit short and very different than I planned but I hope you like it anyway. Sort of 9/Rose. Sort of.**_

**Don't Stop Dancing**

Rose was six years old, running in the parking lot as the rain fell down all around her. Laughter bubbled from inside her, spilling free in glorious happiness. She splashed through the thousands of puzzles, singing at the top of her lungs in between the laughter. Her head thrown back, she danced and danced and danced, not thinking, only doing.

"Rose!" Jackie cried from the railing.

Rose stopped spinning, staring up at her mother with wide brown eyes. She hugged her body as if cold, but she hardly felt the chill accompanying pouring rain. She smiled sheepishly at her mum, giggling yet again. Even from here, she could see Jackie's expression.

"Rose, come inside right now!" Jackie yelled. Beckoning sharply.

"But I'm dancing, Mum!" Rose called back.

"Well you've got to stop now, love," she answered her voice much softer. "You'll get sick."

Rose sighed, but nodded meekly. Her mother beckoned with her hand before heading back in. Rose sighed again, following obediently, but much, much slower. She was sure to splash in every puddle she could along the way, still grinning from ear to ear.

"Hold on,"a voice said from behind.

Rose whirled around, knowing she should be afraid, but feeling nothing but curiosity. A tall man stood before her, dark brown hair beginning to recede, and clear blue eyes sparkling with mirth. His leather jacket was soaked through, but he was smiling at her.

"Yes?" Rose asked.

"I just..." he paused unsure of what to say. "I wanted to tell you... don't listen to your mum. Well, I mean, yes go inside and get warm, but don't ever stop dancing, no matter what anyone tells you."

Rose held his gaze for a moment, surprised by the utter sincerity in his voice and the amusement fading into tenderness in his eyes. Somehow, this man knew her, of that she was sure. She was equally sure she didn't know him, though. Still, she instinctively trusted him, and a small voice she didn't quite believe whispered that someday she would come to him very well indeed. An even smaller voice she couldn't even outside of her sub conciousness told her that one day she would learn to love him.

* * *

Some thirteen years later, Rose watched from a far as her Doctor spoke with her younger self. He had been calmly observing the dancing/singing/laughing child with her grown up counter part up until Jackie came out. He had promptly informed Rose that he was off to do some damage control. She didn't know quite what he meant, but as the memories of being a six year old child flooded into her, she thought she understood. Don't stop dancing. He had never meant dancing in it's most literal sense he had meant... he had meant so much more. Don't give up on love. Don't give up on yourself. Don't forget to laugh. And don't let the world tell you no.

When the Doctor returned, Rose caught his hand, the rain hiding the tears slipping down her cheeks. She kissed his cheek softly, in gratitude for what he had done, and all that he had told her with one sentence. He looked to her, smiling warmly, and for the first time in weeks, she saw true happiness lighting his eyes.


	24. Chapter 24: Don't Wake Me Up

DISCLAIMER: MUST I SAY IT? I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N Don't Wake Me Up **_**by **_**Mcfly **_**is the song today**__**. I truly am sorry for the delay. I had another stupid song I couldn't work with. I did get a few good ideas I plan to use for future chapters though. Yeah! Anyway, I'll try to update tomorrow or Friday. If not... I'm really, really sorry. Oh, many apologies, but I don't have time to answer reviews at the moment. I will get to them, promise. I do love them, so very much. Thanks for all your support!**_

_**Oh so this one is sort of 11/Rose. I will warn you, it's got a fair bit of angst. It's just the way, it played out. **_

**Don't Wake Me Up**

He watches her enter the room, her whole self glowing softly in the darkness. He smiles in warm welcome, holding a hand out to her. She seems to float a few inches off the ground as she glides forward. Her eyes are alight with laughter, and she's smiling that smile he loves so much. Her hand slips into his, fitting perfectly just as it always does. Her skin is warm, her heart beat strong and resilient.

He pulls her closer, trailing kisses up her arm as he does. She laughing now. A more beautiful sound, he's never heard. As her hands find their way into his hair, his eyes flutter closed. Her lips are featherlight against his eyelids, her fingers a gentle breeze skimming across his cheeks. He holds her close, and she nuzzles into his neck. He presses kisses into her cascading hair, loving the way the smell of summer strawberries and crisp vanilla rises into his nose.

She whispers his name over and over again, sending shivers through his body. Of those who know his name, none can say it quite like she can. His hearts race, while his stomach performs any number of gymnastic feats. He's positively melting under her gentle touch. Oh, to feel this way all the time, he thinks.

Her lips meet his in a tender kiss, the underlying passion knocking his feet out from under him. He kisses her back with the same veiled intensity. His eyes close again, as he focuses entirely on the impossibly brilliant woman before him, and the feeling of her lips moving with his in an intricate dance. She pulls away, murmuring his name one last time.

That's when the dream begins to fade... that's when it always fades.

* * *

Amy laid a hand on the Doctor's shoulder as he abruptly jettisoned into the waking world. His eyes were haunted, and tears poured freely down his cheeks. His mouth was open as if a single word was caught in his throat, never said, but lingering in the air. His hand clutched at hers, nearly cutting off her circulation.

As a sob burst from The Doctor's throat, Amy wrapped her arms around him. She held him tightly, running a hand through his hair comfortingly. She sssh-ed him quietly, while her brain tried to process the new development. She had never known the Doctor to be like this before. Never. She couldn't begin to fathom what had happened. Seeing his utter grief, she wasn't sure she wanted to. All she knew was that it was weeks before he slept again.

* * *

The Doctor woke, tears streaming, after yet another dream of Rose. He sat on the edge of his bed, staring forlornly at the plain white wall before him. . As time had gone by, he had begun to welcome sleep. Sleep meant dreams, and dreams meant Rose. Even if the pain was excruciating in the morning, he knew it was worth it. To see her face again, and kiss her as he once had, even if only for a moment was worth it all.


	25. Chapter 25: Dream Big

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN DOCTOR WHO, AND SOMEDAY I MAY COME TO TERMS WITH THAT.

**A/N Dream Big **_**by **_**Ryan Shuppe**_**is the song which inspired this chapter. I think you really might enjoy this one. I decided to continue on with the storyline started in the last chapter. Why? Because it was sad, which I never really like, and I am very possibly doing some angst in the next chapter too. I figured there's nothing like happy romantic-ness to temper the taste of angst.  
It's not my best work I think, but I think it's still all right.**_

_**I debated between doing this or Harry Potter tonight, but as you can see Doctor Who won out. That's only because I'm incredibly nice, and you all are so wonderful. I really do appreciate all your support. It's awesome!**_

_**Oh and as this is the 25th and therefore 1/4 done chapter, I would like to have a little informal poll. if you could please say your favorite five chapters in your review that would be so amazingly awesome! All reviews will be answered tomorrow most likely.  
**_

**Dream Big**

The dream starts as it always does, and after so many nights, he welcomes it. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knows it isn't real, but seeing her face glowing in the darkness, he can't fathom even pushing her away no matter how fictitious. Everything about her is so beautiful and full of love and life. He wraps his arm around her, losing himself in her absolute warmth. The swell within his hearts is so full so great. She's kissing him and singing sweetly in his ear. He kisses her softly in return and hums a forgotten song to harmonize with her melody. Together their song eerily resembles one his own mother sang when he was just a child. Holding her tightly, he wonders if perhaps she will sing lullabies to her children, _their _children. The thought both thrills and frightens him at the same time. He catches a glimpse of what their family would be like just before he slips into the waking world.

* * *

Amy watched the Doctor spin around the console, his smile wide and his laugh pouring freely. Still, she could hear the falseness behind it, and see the pain lurking just behind the shadows of his eyes. She knew he had one of his dreams last night. She heard his quiet tears through the walls, and could sense the deep well of sadness that always accompanied him the morning after. Though she knew all this, she was quite unsure what to do. She was sure he was hurting terribly inside, but what could she possibly do to help? She didn't even know what pained him so.

"Amy, what are you thinking, sitting so sullenly in your own little corner of the world?" The Doctor asked, bouncing to her side.

Amy looked up into his eyes, fighting back tears. She was supposed to help the Doctor, keep him safe, and give him a hand to hold. His hearts were breaking, though, and she could do nothing to stop it. If ever she were to help him, it would have to start with knowing the problem. She took a deep breath, not quite sure how to ask, but knowing she must.

"Why..." she paused. "Why do you cry, Doctor? What is so terrible that it keeps you up at night?"

The Doctor's smile fell almost immediately. He let out a soft defeated sigh as he sank down next to her. His eyes were again the haunted depths Amy had only seen a few times before. She knew his thoughts were far from her.

"It doesn't keep me from sleeping so much as it makes me dread waking up," he whispered. "In my dreams I find again what I once lost."

"Your people?"Amy said hesitantly. Her gut instinct scoffed at the idea.

"No."

"Then what?" she asked. Her eyes pleaded with his and her hand touched his arm gently. He was so close, she could feel it. All he needed was touch of encouragement and he would let it all go. And he needed that. Perhaps more than anything else, he needed someone to listen.

"I dream of her," he murmured, staring at the floor. "I dream of Rose."

Amy's breath released in along whoosh. It was girl! No doubt she wasn't just any girl but still... the Doctor was in love! Suddenly everything made perfect sense. It was as if someone had removed the cotton from her head and she could see everything with perfect clarity. The Doctor had loved this Rose girl, who had presumably loved him in return, and ultimately lost her. Her heart ached in her chest, remembering her pain when she lost Rory, and the happiness of his return.

"What was she like?" Amy asked.

The Doctor raised his eyes to hers once more, tears making their slow way down his cheeks. He blinked just once and looked away to stare at the time rotor humming softly.

"She was brilliant," he said."Brilliant and beautiful and... and she was my Rose."

"Did she..." Amy swallowed, "...die?

He shook his head, a smile finally surfacing. "Thank Rassilon no. She's trapped in a parallel world. But she has her family, and a good life. She's happy."

Amy touched his cheek, wiping away a silvery tear. "But she doesn't have you."

"No, we were torn apart before we had ever truly begun," he said with quiet sadness. "I saw her one last time to say goodbye, but I ran out of time before I could tell her... how much... I-I loved her."

Amy stared at him in somewhat surprised shock. Though it was obvious, the love he felt, she hadn't expected him to say it out right. No, she thought he would surely beat around the bush or leave off the details. Really, it was much better this way though. Get it all out of the way at the very beginning.

"But..." Amy stopped. How could she possibly put this? "But... had you never told her before."

The Doctor laughed, though it was laced with bitterness, as could be expected. "I'm not a complete idiot. Yes, I had told her a few times before."

"Then she knew," Amy said consolingly. "She wouldn't need to hear it again I'm sure."

The Doctor merely shook his head, still staring at the console. He sat perfectly still for maybe half a minute more before hoisting himself off the ground. He extended a hand to help Amy up. When they both were on their feet, he launched them into yet another adventure. But all day and throughout the many days that followed, Amy never forgot. A woman she had never even met now plagued her mind and she swore she would do everything in her power to ensure the Doctor was reunited with his Rose once more.

* * *

The Doctor restlessly paced back and forth, sighing impatiently. Hours of waiting for Amy to return was beginning to wear on him, and Rory as well. Rory leaned against the wall, his fingers drumming on the ground with nervous energy. Just watching him, made the Doctor all the more anxious.

"Are you sure Amy will be able to fly that thing?" Rory asked after another few moments of boredom.

"She's only flying from London to New York. It should be relatively easy," the Doctor explained, running a hand through his mop of hair. "I showed her exactly how, and River's in contact with her; there's no reason why she should have any trouble."

At least he hoped what he was saying was true.

"Then what's taking so long?" Rory whined, but there was just the slightest touch of worry in his voice.

"I don't know." The Doctor replied.

He shook his head as he resumed his pacing. Rory's fingers started pounding the concrete again with a fury to match Jackie Tyler. Would that man ever stop? Really it wasn't doing either of them any good. He didn't even stop to think how his endless pacing might be affecting Rory.

After another ten minutes of waiting and snatches of conversation, a most glorious sound The Doctor's ears. A wide smile broke out across his face, and his hearts seemed to hum. The Tardis was back and Amy was safe. Rory leaped up, whooping as he clapped the Doctor on the back.

"She's here!" he cried. "She made it!"

The Doctor grinned. "Oh yes. I always knew she could."

The two of them hurried through the doors, embracing Amy warmly and throwing surprised hellos to River sitting on the stairs. The Doctor looked between the women, with blatant confusion. What in the world was River doing there?

"What's she doing here?" Rory asked, stealing the question right out of the Doctor's mouth.

Amy smiled, wrapping an arm around Rory. "I needed help with something, and she was happy to come."

The Doctor narrowed his eyes in suspicion. They were were up to something or rather they had been. River was smiling just a little too smugly and Amy... she was practically bouncing off the walls with triumph. Yes, they had done something all right. The question was, what? He crossed to the console, fiddling with this and that, before turning sharply to River after a moment more of pointless deducting. Really, he needed some information to work with.

"What did you do?" the Doctor asked.

"Happy Birthday," she said with a confident smile. "The cake was Amy's idea."

The Doctor stared at her, a frown growing across his face. What was she talking about? His birthday was months ago, and there certainly was no smell of cake in the air. There was though, a very different smell... something he hadn't caught in years except in sleep. He shook his head, trying to clear his head. It would do him no good to dream of her in the day as well.

"Make a wish, Doctor," River added. He glared at her all the more when she winked cheekily. It was bad enough that woman wouldn't say a word about who she was, now she was stringing him along for Rassilon knows what purpose. The fact that she seemed to know _everything _did nothing to help her case.

"I'll find out," he muttered testily. "And if I find you did anything to my Tardis..."

"Relax," Amy said, even as she and Rory started down the hallway. "It's a heap of space-junk. I doubt anything could hurt."

The Doctor grumbled and so did the Tardis. Much to his surprise though, she sounded much less disgruntled than he would have expected. In fact, she was inordinately pleased at the moment. Outwardly, she was humming happily and in the very back of his mind he could just hear her singing softly. He touched the console hesitantly, eying the various knobs and dials. It seemed even his beloved ship was in on the 'birthday surprise'.

River laughed almost as if she could hear the Doctor's thoughts, which he wasn't convinced she couldn't. He was certain he would never get used to her strange, knowing ways no matter how long he knew her.

"I've got to leave now, Doctor," River said as she slid towards the doors. "Sweet Dreams. Enjoy your cake."

He watched her go, still in a state of shock. What could she possibly have done? Well, ultimately it was really Amy. After all, according to River it was Amy's idea in the first place. He wandered towards his bedroom, his feet moving of their own accord as he tried to pick apart the puzzle his leading ladies had presented him. He honestly had no idea even what to think. The fact that the Tardis seemed to be a part of it and extremely pleased with herself only served to confuse him even more.

The Doctor sank down on his bed, slipping off his jacket and bow tie. The pale blue wall opposite him proved to be a very good staring point while he continued to pore through the information available. His shoes and socks fell to the floor in the time it took him to replay the entire scene. He analyzed every word and expression, anything that might give him any sort of clue. He hung his shirt on the bedpost and changed into a pair of warm flannel pajama pants before falling into the soft pile of blankets. His head was spinning, and his chest ached. He closed his eyes, ready to fall into sweet unconsciousness rather than face his current problem. He wanted to see Rose again. and forget his confusion in her kisses.

Sleep would not take pity on him though. The Doctor flicked his eyes open, rolling on his side. What he saw made his breath catch. Perhaps he really was asleep for in the doorway, shining in the moonlight was the very person he wished most to see. Rose smiled angelically, tucking her hair behind her ears almost nervously. He rose from his bed, crossing the room, instead of waiting for her. His whole body seemed to jolt with electricity as the dots slowly connected in his head. This was no dream. How could it be? It was too clear, too real. Everything was in sharp focus as only reality can be. Her eyes though filled with happiness, had a kind of pain he had never before seen in the dreams. Her scent was so strong and heady, reminding him how even a time lord's memory can fade. And when her lips melted into his, he knew with perfect certainty she was real. Only Rose Tyler in the flesh, could kiss like that.

* * *

**A/N **_**In case you didn't figure it out, although I'm sure you did, Amy and River brought Rose back from the parallel world. Also, I ignored Journey's End, or at least the existence of the meta-crisis. But you probably picked up on that too. **_

_**Just a reminder, please tell me your top five chapters thus far. Thank you!  
**_


	26. Chapter 26: Dream of a Normal Death

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN DOCTOR WHO, AND SOMEDAY I MAY COME TO TERMS WITH THAT.

**A/N Dream of a Normal Death **_**written by none other than **_**Murray Gold **_**is the song used today. It's the first one I've used that actually come from Doctor Who. I think I use maybe one or two others. I can't quite remember. It's angsty, but I threw in a little bit of... well not angstness... at the end**__**  
Thank you to those of you who weighed in on the top five chapters. If you haven't, feel free to do so in the next little while. I would love to hear from you. My only request is that you choose from the first 25. If I receive enough votes to change the results I'll post the new results in the future chapters.**_

_**The results (if I counted right)… **_

_**1. Chapter 18: Crazy Love**_

_**2. Chapter 6: Apologize **_

_**3. Chapter 11: Beautiful Mess**_

_**4. Chapter 19: Crush**_

_**5. Chapter 25: Dream Big**_

_**My own personal choices can be found at the end of the chapter. Also there's another slightly important thingie majig. This note is getting a little too long. :-)**_

**Dream of a Normal Death**

Jackie watched over Rose sleeping on her bed, fear filling her heart. Her baby, her little Rose was dying. Silent tears slid down her cheeks, but she didn't dare make a noise for fear of disturbing the small child beside Rose. Gracie was having a hard enough time as it was without Jackie's despair. To lose her mum, at such a young age... It only made Jackie's tears run faster. The poor thing didn't even have a father to turn to. Not yet, Jackie thought resolutely as she saw Mickey duck into the room. There could still be help for Gracie and maybe even Rose as well.

"I found him," Mickey said. "I only had time for about two sentences, but I made sure he heard every word. There's nothing in the universe that could stop him now. He'll get here, even if it kills him."

"He better," Jackie replied, with all the fierceness of a mother grizzly bear. He owed Rose at least much.

"He's comin', Mummy," Gracie said softly to her mother, surprising both Jackie and Mickey; they thought she was still sound asleep. "Daddy's comin'."

* * *

The Doctor stared at the projected image of Mickey in horror, knowing that only something truly terrible could have forced him to use the emergency communicator the Doctor had left with him.

"I don't have much time," Mickey said with heart-stopping urgency, "so you better shut up and listen. Rose is in trouble. Well... more than that. She's dying. She needs you. She needs a hand to hold. There's more, but I'm out of time. Don't you dare let her down, Doctor. She deserves so much more."

Mickey's image faded, leaving the Doctor in a complete state of shock. Rose. Rose was... He sucked in one breath after another, trying to dispel the numb, helpless felling overtaking him. After tow or three minutes, something inside him snapped to attention.

His body was suddenly flooded with icy fire, and he whirled into action. He flew around the console, pulling levers and pushing buttons he had never dared to touch before. The Tardis roared with power as the rotor flared. He sent her soaring into the vortex, preparing to cross through the void. He expected her to protest or refuse to go through, but it seemed she was just as worried for Rose as he was. They crashed into the parallel world, the Tardis screaming in his head with the effort. His head was pounding with the knowledge that they could have just ripped a terrible hole in the multiverse, but none of that mattered in comparison to Rose. She was dying, possible dead all ready. Everything else was second to that.

The Doctor stepped out of the doors, and straight into the Tyler entrance hall. Pete was waiting at the foot of the stairs, as if he knew the Doctor would be arriving there. The Doctor crossed the floor, his strides long and purposeful. Pete opened his mouth to greet him, but he cut across before any words were said.

"Where is she?" the Doctor asked.

"Follow me," Pete said, and started up the stairs.

The Doctor followed, trying to listen to Pete's voice rather than pay attention to the droves of possibilities running through his head. His fingers toyed with his screwdriver in an unsuccessful attempt to rid himself of the nerves.

"She passed out on field assignments three times before we pulled her out," Pete was explaining. "The doctors examined her, but they couldn't find anything wrong. We let her keep working but only in the office. That's when she started having nausea and vertigo. After a few black outs, we made her stay at home. Things have only gotten worse. The doctors still couldn't find any physical problems, and they've assured us she'll get better soon. Jackie and Rose have always had good instincts, though and they don't agree. Then of course there's Gracie..."

The Doctor was going to interrupt and ask who Gracie was, but just then, they arrived at what could only have been Rose's room. The door was exactly like the one she had in the Tardis, plain white, but for single pink rose painted in the center. Mickey and Jackie stood just outside, whispering apprehensively to one another. He thought he saw a flash of pretty brown curls behind them, but he didn't have time to think that through. He pushed the door open, clenching a nervous fist.

The Doctor's first thought upon entering the room, was that it was distinctly Rose. Photo frames littered every surface, and the soft smell of perfume permeated the room. Clothes were draped across the chair and bed posts, and jewelry and makeup spilled all across the vanity table. His eyes fell on her, his breath catching in his throat. She still could make his hearts stop with her beautiful, glowing face. Everything about her looked just as he remembered, including the warm smile she immediately threw him. The only indication that she was dying was her brown yes, which looked more tired and worn than even his own.

"You came," Rose whispered, her grin full and bright.

"Course I did," he replied, ignoring the acute tightness of his throat. "Someone's got to keep you out of trouble."

Her smile fell a million miles, and unshed tears filled her eyes. "It's a little too late for that, I'm afraid," she said sadly.

The Doctor shook his head violently, dropping to his knees before her. "No," he said. "I'm a time traveler remember? I'll take you some place far away where they have a cure. You'll be off having brilliant adventures in no time."

"Doctor," Rose said, her voice firm, despite the tears now flooding down her cheeks. "I am going to die."

"No," he murmured. Tears slipped out of his own eyes, falling into his hands tightly clasped around hers. The droplets glistened on their skin, shimmering in the dim light. She reached out to wipe them off his cheeks, pressing a kisses to his closed eyelids as she did.

"Yes," she said in simple admission.

The Doctor shook his head, but words would not come. What words could possibly voice his overwhelming grief anyway? How was he supposed to let her go so soon after finding her?

"You promised me forever," he finally croaked.

She smiled and gently brushed a hand through his hair. "And we'll have it, someday," Rose promised, "when we both get to whatever comes next. Then we'll have our forever."

He nodded silently, his eyes catching hers again. So beautiful... always beautiful. From nineteen to twenty-two she was still the beautiful Rose who had so easily stolen his hearts. She rested her forehead against his, their tears beginning to mingle. His lips caught hers for just the briefest of moments before he pulled away.

"I love you," he whispered hardly louder than a dropping pin.

She smiled, knocking her nose against his. "Love you too, daft alien that you are."

The Doctor grinned, ready to throw out a protest, when a small voice came from outside the door.

"Mummy?"

"Come in, sweetheart," Rose called immediately. The Doctor stared at her for half a second before it sunk in.

"Mummy?" he mouthed, pointing to her. Rose smiled somewhat sheepishly in the affirmative before pointing a finger right back at him. He mirrored her action, and then his jaw dropped to what might very well have been the floor as he realized what she meant. "Me?" he mouthed even as he heard the padding of tiny feet enter the room. She nodded, her smile almost a smirk as she turned to look at her- their- daughter.

"Come here, Gracie," Rose said.

The Doctor watched in awe as the small girl scrambled into Rose's lap. Her curly brown hair, was the exact shade as his own, and her lithe body definitely screamed 'Doctor'. Her eyes were entirely Rose's but for the tiny flecks of gold. Her full lips no doubt came from Rose as well, and he wouldn't be surprised if her tiny little hand packed a mean slap. Only thoughts of Rose's impending death, kept him from leaping for joy.

Gracie looked up at him, with shyness but obvious curiosity as well. He knew she was probably seeing much the same expression in his own eyes.

"Hello," the Doctor said softly, not entirely sure what else to say.

Gracie was silent, but wide grin spread across her face, and she jumped out of Rose's lap to wrap her arms around his neck. His arms slid around her small body, hugging her as close as he could. Tears spilled down his cheeks once more, as he thought of just how precious his little girl was. His eyes lifted to meet Rose's, and he was surprised to find she was crying too. She was weeping with complete joy and complete sorrow. Joy, to see the two things she loved most in the world, sorrow, to know she was going to lose it all.

The Doctor gently placed Gracie back on the ground as he moved to sit beside Rose. Something in the way she held herself was scaring him.

"Go find Nan for me," Rose said, her voice painfully tired. The Doctor closed his eyes, knowing what was coming. "Tell her to bring Mickey and Granddad as well."

Gracie nodded, and hustled out of the room, leaving them in silence. The Doctor kept his eyes shut tightly, even when Rose's hand slipped into his. He gripped her hand tightly, so afraid to let go, fearing when he did, it would be for the last time.

"Help me up," Rose directed quietly, and the Doctor's eyes flashed opened. "I want to go on one last trip."

The Doctor couldn't find the words to say in response. By now, he could feel and see that denying anything was pointless. Instead, he helped her to her feet, wrapping a steadying arm around her waist, as they made their way towards the Tardis. Her family was waiting for them then, and he quietly stepped aside so she could have her last goodbyes. When they were finished, with tears pouring down each of their faces, he took her hand once more, and scooped Gracie up with his free arm.

The Doctor stepped into the Tardis with his family on either side of him. His two fantastic, wonderful girls. For one it was to be her first trip, for the other her last. He kissed the tops of both of their heads and sent the Tardis spinning into the Vortex.

Later, when the Doctor and Gracie entered the Tardis entirely alone, her hand shaking in his, he reflected not for the first time on what it would be like to have a normal human life. To live with the woman he loved, raise a beautiful family, watch as his grandchildren and great-grandchildren were born. And not for the first time he thought how wonderful it would be to simply die a normal death.

* * *

_Somewhere in the wide expanse of time and space, a_ _woman races through a field of wildflowers, crashing through the flowers with reckless abandon. Her eyes sparkle with mirth and her laughter fills the air with it's bright musical sound, as her blonde hair streams out behind her. On the far side of the field a man waits with open arms, smiling widely as he bats at his wild brown hair. He catches her up in his arms, spinning her in a circle as they both laugh with absolute happiness. He presses kisses into her hair, and she wraps her arms tightly around his neck. They laugh and smile some more, all the while wearing matching expression of utter devotion and love. _

_What is this place? Full of happiness, where lovers are reunited, and flowers always bloom? Why this, this is heaven._

_

* * *

_

**A/N _Okay so, as you can see, my updating is kind of going down hill. I'm going to try for Mondays and Thursdays. If Tuesday or Friday morning comes and there is no update, somebody please, please, please message me, so I can motivate myself!_**

**_Here are my favorites. They were terribly hard to choose! Oh and they're just in numerical order, not preference_**

**_Chapter 13: The Best is Yet to Come_**

**_Chapter 18: Crazy Love_**

**_Chapter 19: Crush_**

**_Chapter 20: Cut_**

**_Chapter 25: Dream Big_**


	27. Chapter 27: Escape

DISCLAIMER: WHAT DO YOU KNOW? I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N Escape **_**by **_**Hoobastank **_**is the next song on the list. I believe it's the first of the E's. Anyway, so the whole Monday, Thursday thing goes into affect today, I decided, since I totally missed it last week. So 10/Rose today. Not much else to say. Well... except I should warn you it's a bit odd, but it's honestly all I had at the moment. I hope you like it. Oh, and if anyone has a request of something they'd like to see in the future chapters, let me know.**_

**Escape**

Rose sat on the floor, her fingers absently twisting the chain around her neck. Her eyes lingered for hours on the thousand photographs scattered across the carpet. Everywhere she looked, she was met with picture after picture of the man who haunted her dreams. In many, she recognized herself as well, but beyond that, nothing was recognizable. There were planets of gorgeous blue ocean water, and fire-red sunsets. There were markets bustling with people of any number of species, and there were quiet hills over looking flower flooded fields. But these things were foreign to her. Only the man with sorrowful eyes brought any sort of a memory to her.

Rose knew very little of the world she now found herself in, but she knew even less about her past. Jackie was her mum, Pete was her father, but not, Mickey was her childhood friend, and she was not in the correct universe. That was all she could say of her current life. As to her past there was only one thing, a single person in nineteen years of memories that she could place. A man named the Doctor.

* * *

It was entirely by accident that the Doctor arrived in the parallel world. Once he was there though, he had nothing to complain about. He dragged Donna out of the Tardis, throwing out a hasty explanation as they took a cab out to the Tyler mansion. By the time they arrived, she was nearly as excited as himself. He rang the bell, hopping impatiently from one foot to the other, as Donna laughed at his nervous energy. At least had a pretty good excuse though. It wasn't everyday someone gets reunited with the one they love.

The moment Jackie answered the door, the Doctor knew something was wrong. She burst into tears that were quite clearly not those of happiness or joy. Her arms flew wildly about him, and she sobbed into his shoulder until Pete pried her off.

"Things... are bit complicated," Pete started, his voice hesitant and unsure. "Rose... well, she doesn't..."

"She doesn't remember her life with you,"Mickey said as he appeared from one of the doorways. "She doesn't have a clue who or what the Tardis is, and she can't even remember Jack."

The Doctor could feel the blood leave his face, and his hearts pounded erratically. Beside him, Donna let out a soft gasp, though he doubted she understood the half of it. His whole body was numb with a sudden fear and he now understood Rose's panic when she thought he would forget her. How wrong he was to ever think her fears were irrational.

"And me?" the Doctor asked, his voice hoarse. "Has she forgotten me?"

"She has dreams, nightmares, where she sees your face," Pete said. "She recognizes you in the pictures, knows your name. Beyond that... it's hard to say. Does she remember loving you? Does she still? There's no way of knowing. All she ever says is your name. Sometimes with a question of who or where you are, but even when we answer she still doesn't know or understand. It's as if she's locked in dream world."

"Perhaps she is," the Doctor said quietly, before picking up speed. "Sometimes, a person can become so lost in dreams, that even when they wake they still are lost and confused as if they're still in the dream scape. If she's trapped herself in her own mind, it would be impossible to escape without help."

"And can you?" Jackie asked, her voice soft and pleading. "Can you help her?"

The Doctor met her glassy eyes, tears starting to tease at his own.

"I don't know."

* * *

Rose was gathering up the photos in a pile for Jackie or Pete to put away when they returned. Her fingers were unsteady and shook, her head and heart hurting from the effort of trying to remember. All she could feel was loss, and sadness, and all she could remember was pain and loneliness. She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them desperately. Tears streamed down her face, but she made no move to wipe them away. What was the point, more would soon join them anyway.

"Rose?"

Rose's head snapped up immediately, knowing that voice anywhere. Oh to meet those eyes that plagued her dreams at night, to hear that voice of time, and to know that it was all real. _He_ was real. No matter what the forgotten memories or the dreams tried to say. He knelt before her, here and now, and she could feel his warmth, feel the familiarity of his gentle touch. Though she literally knew nothing of him, she couldn't help but be gladdened by the worry and the love shining in his gaze.

"Doctor," she whimpered like a tiny child. "I can't remember. I—I don't..."

"Shh," he said soothingly, brushing away her tears. "It's going to be alright, Rose. I'm here to help."

"Please," she whispered. Over and over again, the words fell out of her lips, a prayer to anyone who cared to listen. Tears filled the Doctor's eyes, and momentary fear welled up inside her. Maybe he couldn't help her. Maybe she was going to be lost forever.

But as his fingers sought out her temples, and his eyes filled with determination, Rose felt an overwhelming sense of calm. This was the Doctor. One thought, pushing through the walls of her mind, told her he would take care of her. She could trust him.

* * *

_Rose huddled in the stone cold cage, waiting ever waiting for someone to find her. The air was still around her, and the chill was beginning to crawl underneath her skin. She didn't know how much longer she could afford to wait. In the distance, she could hear confusion and loss in her absence. The small part of her left outside the cage was struggling. Without the other, each were bound to eventually wither and die. _

_ But then a new sound could be heard. A voice of beauty and majesty, a voice she knew and loved beyond all else. The Doctor was here, in the maze of her mind, searching for the answer, searching for her. Rose leaped to her feet, crying out in joy. He was here. He was going to rescue her yet again._

_ "Doctor!" she screamed in delight, hoping he could hear her. _

_ She could feel him pause in the search, only part way through the maze. He _had_ heard her!_

_ "Doctor!" she cried again, and this time she could hear him cry out in return._

_ "Rose!" he yelled, his voice just as joyful as her own. The pounding of his feet resonated throughout her mind, and she could tell he was getting closer. He was jogging, then running, and then sprinting as the cage was within sight._

_ The Doctor stopped just sort of the bars, grinning madly at her. Rose stood, pressing against the cage, to reach a hand out to him. He caught it in his own, and she nearly burst into song. The feel of his skin against hers, his mind melding with hers. She had never felt such happiness._

_ "Get me out?" Rose asked, her tongue poking between her teeth._

_ The Doctor's smile fell. "I don't have the key."_

_ Rose laughed, tugging him closer so she could reach his pocket. She fumbled with all the items inside until she found what she was looking for._

_ "Of course you do," she replied, as she held out a tiny silver key. "You've always had the key."_

_ His grin returned full force, as he snatched the key away. He forced it into the lock, whooping when it smoothly turned. The cage door slid open, and Rose jumped free, laughing aloud. _

_ "Thank you," she said sincerely. "I wasn't going to last much longer in then."_

_ "Glad I could help," the Doctor said, ducking his head. "But I imagine you would have gotten out sooner or later."_

_ "Oh no," she said. "I could never escape without my Doctor. Never have, never will. _

* * *

Rose's eyes blinked open, and she smiled to see the Doctor still kneeling in front of her. He smiled in return, offering a soft hello. She almost said hello in return but at last minute, she decided a kiss was a much better form of greeting. By the way he kissed her back, the Doctor must have thought so too.


	28. Chapter 28: Every Time I Hear Your Name

DISCLAIMER: MAH, STOP ASKING. I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N Every Time I Hear Your Name **_**by **_**Keith Anderson **_**is the song that should have been Thursday but ended up on this lovely Saturday evening. I actually was going to post on time, but we went camping and what do you know, there was no Internet access. Typical.  
So I just re-watched the Girl in the Fireplace, which bothers me to no end. I don't know quite what to think of it, beyond the fact that I don't like it and that it doesn't make sense. Anyway, I'm quite fond of this chapter. I don't like the beginning as much, but it gets better as it goes along. Reviews will be answered on Monday probably.**_

**Every Time I Hear Your Name**

The Doctor lay back on his bed, trying to force away all thoughts of Reinette. How abandoned she must have felt... she waited her whole life for him, and he let her down. She _died_ waiting for him. He tossed her letter to the floor, shutting his eyes tightly. Was there no promise in this world he could keep?

_She had a good life, _the Tardis said, not entirely gentle but not cruelly either. _She waited for you, but while she waited she lived and she was happy. I think she knew you would not return. _

_ Still, _ he said with a sigh, _I would liked to have given her at least one trip._

_ I wouldn't, _the Tardis retorted almost snorting. _I know you care for her, and I respect that, but one trip would accomplish nothing. She would be lost and have trouble understanding the world around her, I would be terribly irritable for days, and your relationship with Rose would be broken even more than it is, I think. _

_ More than it is? _The Doctor asked, his brow furrowed. _I don't understand._

_ You're losing her, Theta, _she warned. _Everyday, you're losing her more and more. Her faith in you is fading. She no longer knows what to expect and it frightens her. She used to be your everything, her safety second only to the safety of the universe. But now she's met Sarah Jane, and sees what's in her future. She lost you to Reinette with no hope of your return and she fears for her place in your world, in your heart. _

_ But that's crazy, _he said, but his hearts were suddenly feeling very panicky. _This is Rose we're talking about, as in _Rose Tyler, _the one I would die for over and over again, have died for actually. I promised her. I told her I would never leave her. I... I can't lose her. _

_ Then fix it._

The Doctor would have replied, but the Tardis had all ready left his mind. No doubt she was giving him some time to think over what he had done like any good parent should. He huffed, but in reality, she knew what she doing. Within five minutes, he had analyzed everything and come to the conclusion that the Tardis was indeed most likely correct.

He slowly walked to Rose's room, trying to decide on the best way to make things right. He didn't know if she would even be awake this late at night, but something told him she was having just as much trouble sleeping as he was even if it was for slightly different reasons. When he at last reached her door, he considered knocking but ultimately decided against it. He had never knocked in the past, no reason to now.

Rose was sitting on the bed when the Doctor walked in, staring sadly at the wall. She turned abruptly to look at him, and her eyes widened in surprise. His hand automatically went to his neck, and his eyes dropped to the floor for half a moment.

"Sorry, thought you were asleep," he offered in explanation. There was no need to tell her he had been hoping she was awake.

"Nah, I napped for five hours after all," she said with a smile. He ignored the fact that she had to force it.

"In that case, how would you like to go on a little outing?" he asked. When she hesitated, his hearts pounded with worry. It never occurred to him she would turn him down.

"With or without aliens?" Rose asked. "I've had enough adventure for one day."

"No, no," the Doctor assured her. "I was thinking just a trip somewhere quiet, where we could relax a bit."

Rose shrugged, but she stood anyways. He broke into a wide grin, and slipped his hand into hers. He was scared she would reject it, but her hand merely tightened around his in soft acceptance.

He tugged her into the console room, where he swiftly pressed a series of buttons on the Tardis. He had no idea where they would end up, but he trusted the Tardis to take them somewhere quiet and out of the way. When the door opened to reveal a starlit sky and an apple grass hill, he knew she had chosen correctly.

The Doctor led Rose out the doors, about ten feet away, where he carefully set out his overcoat for them to sit on. She settled down next to him, although he noticed she kept a careful distance from him, as if he would explode on contact. Her hand still remained entwined with his though, which he took as comforting sign.

"So, stargazing huh?" she asked, turning her head to look at him.

"Yep," he replied, smiling. "Unless you have something better to be doing?"

"No, stargazing is just fine," she said, laughing a little. Laughing was good. It meant she was regaining at least some of her lost confidence.

"Look, you see that group of stars there? They're..."

* * *

An hour later, the Doctor finished another story, his voice beginning to dry out. Rose had long since given up her cautiousness and was snuggled into his side. One hand rested on his chest, the other still toyed with his fingers. His free hand snaked through her hair, and his hearts were at peace. He never needed to say a single word about Reinette or Sarah Jane, but Rose seemed to understand anyway. That was one reason he fell in love with her to begin with. She very rarely needed the verbal discussion. All he wanted her to know and all she needed to hear, she could gather from his actions. Maybe that was bad, maybe it was good. It certainly served it's purpose that night under the stars.

"What about that set there?" Rose asked. "Looks a bit like a flower."

"A rose to be exact," the Doctor said. "The explorers thought so too. Two thousand years from now, they name it the Eternal Rose."

Rose grinned, and the Doctor smiled in return. In that moment, with her eyes sparkling and her cheeks red from the slight chill, he had never seen anything more beautiful. He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, and her arms wrapped around him.

"I'm sorry about Reinette,"he said softly, surprising both of them. He hadn't intended to bring her up, when things seemed to be working out just fine. Still now that he had said it, he better follow through. "I promised you yesterday, I would never leave you. Then first chance I get what do I do?"

"You had to save her Doctor, I understand that," Rose answered quietly. "Plus... it's not like..."

"What?"

"One way or another you and I... well, someday I won't be with you anymore," she said simply, shrugging in his arms. "You were trying to tell me that, and... I can understand a little better now what you meant."

"You're... special to me, Rose. I don't want to leave you behind, ever," the Doctor said, meaning every word. Of all of his companions, he had never had one like Rose. So perfect, and yet so flawed. So utterly human and so completely his. No one's hand fit half as well in his as hers did. He loved her.

"Even if you do, or if I die or whatever," Rose said, hurrying past the thought of either of those things, "When I'm gone, promise you won't forget me?"

The Doctor turned to look at her in surprise. How could she ever think that. "Never. I would never forget you. You're so incredibly you I could never forget."

Rose met his eyes earnestly, looking for the truth of his words. He kissed her forehead again, drawing her even closer.

"Do want to know how I'll remember you?" he asked into her hair. "I'll plant a garden in the Tardis entirely devoted to roses. I'll grow every color I know. I'll take care of it everyday. My companions will ask about it, and I'll say it belongs to a very old, very dear friend of mine. Every time I eat a banana, I'll think of the first time we met Jack and of banana smoothies every Thursday in the kitchen. When I smell chips, I'll think of you and how much you loved them, how much... how much you loved me."

"And when you hear my name?"Rose asked, tears now falling from her cheeks.

The Doctor carefully wiped away her tears, before rubbing away his own. "And every time I hear your name, I'll close my eyes and picture this moment. I'll think of you. I'll remember you."

"You'll remember this," Rose whispered, before pressing her lips to his.

The Doctor closed his eyes and kissed her back tenderly. Their tears mingled, making a mess of mascara on their cheeks, but he had never been so happy in his entire life. She was safely nestled in his hearts again, and their world was in perfect balance once more.

* * *

Two thousand years later, a group of explorers examined the stars over head, searching out constellations, when a strange man arrived. His body was young, but his eyes were ancient and knowing. They listened in awe as he pointed out a rose in the skies above, and told a story of love and devotion. He told them about a lonely wander who had long ago lost his true love, but how she was kept alive in his memory throughout all of eternity. He told them, she was his everything, but all she asked was that he remember her. He asked them then, to keep the memory alive, to tell the story to all they met. He left as soon as he came, but the visit remained forever in those explorers hearts. When the new colonies were naming the stars, the explorers asked for the flower in the sky to be named the Eternal Rose. And so the legend continued, and the lover's Rose remained forever among the stars.


	29. Chapter 29: Fearless

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Look who's back from the dead after suffering from a terrible disease known as homework. Oh and let's not forget my mother grounded me as well. Yeah... luck has so not been on my side this past little while. Neither has time. Sheesh, I think every powerful entity in the world has crashed down on me lately. It even snowed, so we can count off Old Man Winter and Mother Nature too.**_**  
**_**Anyway, **_**Fearless **_**by **_**Taylor Swift**_**is the song choice. I used Halloween as my theme today, and it went all right. Not spectacular but not dreadful. I hope you like it in any case. I don't really know what Halloween is like in England but hopefully it's not too different from the American holiday. **_

_**Oh and I should answer reviews tonight, but I really can't so I'll try to do that tomorrow or when I post next. Cross your fingers, that I manage to find some more time for writing this week. By the way, we hit over a hundred reviews. Yeah! Bonus points to StarryNight101 for being the 100 reviewer! Thanks so much to everyone!  
**_

**Fearless**

"I don't get it. I really don't get it," the Doctor said to Mickey as they wandered aimlessly through the crowd of costumed people. "She asked to come home for a _party_. She misses parties all the time, but she refused to speak to me until I agreed to bring her back in time for this one. And she's went and run off with her friends earlier, and I have know idea where in this place she is or even what she looks like. I hate Halloween."

"Relax,"Mickey said, as he scooped up a handful of candies from a table. "There's free food and a movie downstairs. Hang loose for awhile, and eventually Rose will come find you."

"Oh that's just brilliant," the Doctor snapped."Wait around for who knows how long until Rose has had her fill of fun. Best idea I've ever heard."

Mickey shrugged. "You could look for her if you really wanted. My guess is she's either playing games with Shareen in the other room, or dancing in here. Actually, she might be in one of the rooms downstairs too. I don't really know."

"Really helpful, aren't you?"

The Doctor turned, planning to go sulk on an empty couch somewhere, but much to his surprise a tiny little brunette dressed as a fairy stood directly in front of him. He mumble a quiet, excuse me, before moving to go past her. Her small hand wrapped around his arm, though, stopping him dead in his tracks.

"Want to dance?" she asked in high, delicate voice.

The Doctor felt his collar growing hot, and he tugged nervously at his tie. "I'm afraid I can't. I'm looking for my friend, actually."

"Please, just one dance," she pleaded, and her big brown eyes looked softly up at him. "I'm sure you're friend can wait."

"Well..." he said uncertainly. What was it with girls and making him dance. He didn't even like dancing. Well... not really. "It's really important I find her though. She-"

"She's probably drunk and won't know what time it is anyway," the brunette said.

The Doctor couldn't help but laugh at that. He had never seen Rose get drunk. In fact he'd never even seen her touch alcohol before, but that may have been caused by the fact she never really had time when they were off running for their lives. Tea was much better for you anyway. Still, the idea of a drunk Rose was incredibly funny. He could just see her tottering around and laughing at anything and everything. He wondered if perhaps she would swoon into his arms and he would be forced to carry her home. Secretly, he rather liked the idea. Not only would it make him feel terribly manly, he liked the thought of her snuggling into his shoulder and her hair tickling his skin.

"I doubt it," he finally replied, smiling at the girl. "Maybe you should ask that bloke over there." He pointed to Mickey still raiding the treat table. "I bet he would love to dance."

The girl pouted, but she drifted off anyway. The Doctor sighed, glad to be free of any obligation to dance. Now, he really wanted to go find a couch or a chair or really anywhere he could have a proper pity-party. But, the fates were against him, and halfway across the dance floor he was apprehended by yet another costumed girl looking for a dance. His eyes flicked momentarily to the deep red dress which hugged her chest corset style before flooding to the floor in a mass of fabric, but they were drawn to the warm brown eyes behind a red mask trimmed with gold. He knew those eyes.

"Would you care to dance?" he asked before she even had a chance.

Rose smiled, a glorious, tongue-poking-out smile, and nodded once. "I'd love to."

The Doctor, grasped her hand in one of his own, while the other sought out her waist. He pulled her close, inhaling the sweet smell of her perfume.

"So what are you supposed to be dressed as?" she asked with another grin as she eyed his pinstripes and converses.

"I'm a Doctor," he answered lightly, "The Doctor actually. What are you dressed as?"

"Oh, I'm a Rose of course," she told him, very seriously. "Don't you see?"

He paused for a moment to give her outfit another careful consideration. "Yes, I do see it now. How could I miss it."

"You might have a least dyed your hair ginger, you know," Rose said with a laugh. "There's no fun in being yourself all the time."

"Speak for yourself, Miss Rose Tyler," he replied. "I quite like being rude and not ginger."

"I'm sure you do," she said. "Still, you really should find some way to properly celebrate Halloween. And no, coming to this party doesn't count."

"Oh then what would you suggest?" the Doctor asked. By this point, he was beginning to have an idea. An idea, that really had no business being in his head at all. But each moment that passed saw the Idea becoming more and more agreeable to him. He felt emboldened, courageous, as if nothing could ever stop him. He felt in love.

"I don't know, watch a scary movie or go to a haunted house or something," she answered.

He though for a minute and the more he thought, the more the Idea became a real tangible thing. Really there was nothing to hold him back. If she called him on it, he could claim it was in celebration of Halloween. He ought to just do it then and then.

"I don't think either of those will work," the Doctor said. "You see Rose, tonight... tonight I feel invincible."

"Then do something, wild and impulsive," Rose said, her voice nearly a whisper, as if she could sense the Idea too. "Be fearless."

Her words were too good to ignore, and so he gladly took her advice. His hands gently held her face, and his lips crashed against hers in an unflinching, flawless way. She kissed him right back, like she had been expecting it all along. Her hands tangled in his hair, and tugged him closer, as she laughed into his lips. He closed his eyes, loving the moment, loving her. Tonight he was fearless of the slap Jackie might give him, fearless of what his people would think were they still alive to think, fearless of his own long life and the heartache it entailed, fearless of the great gift she had to offer, and fearless of the gift he could off in return. Tonight he was completely hers.


	30. Chapter 30: Feels Like Home

DISCLAIMER: I REALLY OUGHT TO OWN DOCTOR WHO, BUT I DON'T.

**A/N Feels Like Home **_**by, well I don't actually know who it's by. I could Google it I suppose but then, so could you. **__**I'm terribly sorry for the late chapter, but I have a really good reason. I was in my school musical and we performed last week. Before that, we had longer practices and I was too tired to do anything but my homework when I got home. It was so, so much fun though, so I figured you guys would forgive me.  
Anyway, I finally watched the fifth season... well, only the first two episodes so far. I like the new credits, the new Doctor, and the new Tardis is all right too. I like the old Tardis better, and I don't like the new logo. Beyond that, I have yet to pass judgment.  
That little rant did have a point. This chapter features 11 and for some reason that made me want to explain my moment of joy-ish.  
Oh, and happy Thanksgiving today for my fellow Americans. **_

**Feels Like Home**

Rose had never been good in fights. She let her temper flare up, and she said things she knew would cut deep. She withheld nothing. It was an all or nothing characteristic that carried over into many aspects of her life. However, because she knew how low she could get in a fight, she avoided them at all costs. Perhaps that only made things worse when she did get in a fight, but that's the way she worked.

The most recent fight was with her mum over something incredibly stupid. She was so angry and frustrated, Rose couldn't even remember what had started the fight. All she knew, was that there _was _a fight, a terrible raging argument which ended with the door slamming behind her as she ran away. Hours later, Rose sat in an upstairs room of Wester Drumlins, staring at the cracked ceiling. She often came to the abandoned house when she needed time to think completely on her own. The calm was well worth the price to get to the house in the first place.

Rose closed her eyes, sliding off her jacket to use as a pillow. She sang softly to herself, listening to the way her voice echoed in the empty house. It was a haunting sound that made her grasp at memories that did not exist. There in the strangely secluded world of dreams, where time itself seemed to echo in her head, she fell asleep with warmth in her heart.

As Rose's eyes slowly opened, she first became aware of a hand resting on her shoulder. She shot quickly away, nearly screaming to see a man kneeling beside her, but his eyes inspired a strange trust inside her, as if she had known him before.

"Relax," he said softly, raising his hands, palms up, in a gesture of peace. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Rose surveyed the man silently. He had floppy brown hair above a good strong face. His eyes were old and knowing though he could only have been in his twenties. He wore a plain button up shirt, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, with suspenders and a bow-tie besides. On the floor, there rested a tweed jacket with elbow patches that seemed to fit with the rest of him in the oddest, but most perfect way. He was certainly strange, but she instinctively trusted him, bow-tie and all.

"Who are you?" she asked, scooting just the tiniest bit closer.

He grimaced. "Ah... I'm afraid you can't know that just yet. Call me John."

Rose gazed at him curiously, only half understanding what he said. She reached out a tentative hand to touch his hair, surprised when he seemed to flinch under her touch.

"I'm Rose,"she said, fingering a lock of his hair. "Rose Tyler."

He grinned, though she had no idea why. She liked the way he smiled. It was crazy and childlike, but one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen.

"How old are you, just now?" John asked. He eyed her hand, and she quickly snatched it away from his head. He probably thought she was creeper. It wasn't as if she normally went around touching complete strangers. But then, he wasn't a stranger, not really. He didn't feel like a stranger.

"Seventeen," she replied, absently twining her hands around each other. They felt oddly empty.

John's eyes shut briefly as if he were savoring something sweet, or reviewing a memory. Rose couldn't quite decide which it was. When his eyes flashed open again, he smiled at her. It shot straight into her, and made a wave of warmth and tingles pass through her. There was the strangest tug at her heart and she felt as if a kitten were snuggling into bed inside her. She blushed.

"Seventeen. Rassilon, you'll be you in no time," he said. He was confusing her, but it only served to make her smile. It was like he already knew her, or perhaps _would _know her. "What are you doing here anyway?"

Rose shrugged and looked around at the room with it's pealing wall paper and dirt covered floors. She couldn't really put her finger on the exact reason why she liked the old house so much. There was just feeling in the air. It made her feel complete. She felt connected to something or someone she knew in a distant dream. It was home.

"I'm thinking," she answered simply.

John nodded, but his gaze grew distracted. He stood and walked to the window. His fingers drummed against the sill and he glanced anxiously at the watch on his wrist. Rose crossed the room to stand next to him, suddenly worried for the man she didn't even know.

"You can't come here again," John said urgently.

Rose stared at him in shock as he turned to face her. His eyes were dead serious, and his hands gripped her shoulders. For the first time since waking up, she was frightened. His complete change in countenance and the earnest worry he now held scared her.

"There are things you'll do someday," he said, "very important things. And you're going to meet someone who will change your life, but not if you come back here. Listen to me, Rose. The angels will be coming here anytime and if they find you..."

She watched him wide-eyed, too stunned to speak. His eyes were glistening with unshed tears, and his voice was beginning to catch in his throat. He lifted one hand to touch her cheek, and she caught it in her own hand as he slowly dropped it. His hand tightened around hers and she was surprised at how well it fit with hers. It was as if their hands were always meant to be together.

"I don't know why I trust you, or why I'm saying this," she started, looking straight into his eyes. "But I promise you, I will never come back here."

John sighed in relief, and for a split second she regretted what she was about to say.

"On the condition, you tell me your name,"Rose whispered.

He stared at her for a moment, his eyes searching hers for something. Whatever he found, seemed to satisfy him. He nodded and then leaned in close to her ear. He whispered one word, one single, beautiful word. It struck a chord deep within her, shooting a feeling of rightness through her whole body. It was name without age, set outside of time, a name of infinite majesty, and it was a name she was born to love.

Rose pushed up on her toes, kissing him straight on the lips. She expected him to freeze up, or stumble backwards, but he didn't do either of those things. He kissed her back gently, his lips as soft as a down pillow. He pulled away soon after, but his arms stayed tight around her waist. She rested her head on his shoulder content to remain there forever.

"I really shouldn't have told you that," he said, pressing a light kiss to her hair. "You'll have to keep that to yourself."

Rose raised her head to look at him questioningly and he shook his head.

"No," he said, though his voice was sad. "You can't come with me. You've got a few more years to go."

"Promise, you'll find me again," she asked, touching his cheek.

He laughed, though she couldn't think why he would. "Oh I'll find you..." he laughed some more. "You might not know it's me, but I'll find you."


	31. Chapter 31: Forever and Always

DISCLAIMER: SANTA? CAN I HAVE DOCTOR WHO? NAH, THAT WOULD NEVER WORK.

**A/N **_**Yeah, it's me! I'm alive, and I'm still shipping and writing and loving all you wonderful people, even if I haven't been around in a while. Sorry, for the wait. I will try to update everyday this week as a Christmas present to both you and me. I have a few good stories up my sleeve for this week. **_**  
**_**Right, so the song is**_** Forever and Always **_**by **_**Taylor Swift**_**. Christmas themed writing is so much fun, by the way! Yes! So this chapter is totally different than what I had planned. I mean totally different. I don't know if I'm all that fond of it, but I guess you guys can be the judge of how it is. Much love to you all and a Merry Christmas to all my Christmas celebrates out there. Oh and sad story. I still have school tomorrow. :-( It's my last day.  
Oh yeah, and don't be surprised if there are a lot of mistakes. Course you're probably used to it from my other chapters. If I had time to look over them I would... but nope I don't have time. **_

**Forever and Always**

Rose sat on the captain's chair, tapping her feet absently as the Doctor leaned against the console. His brows were knit, and his lips pulled slightly in. Overall he had the expression of a slightly confused, slightly pouty little boy.

"Let me get this straight," he said, shaking his head. "You want to decorate the Tardis for Christmas, even though time is relative in the Tardis and it therefore could very well be the middle of July?"

"Yes," Rose said, smiling sweetly. "That is exactly what I want."

"But why?" the Doctor moaned. "It's not even a proper house."

"I don't care," she said. "It is a home though, and I haven't had a proper Christmas in two years. This year, I want to feel the anticipation, decorate and enjoy those decorations, have a nice little party with Mum and Mickey, and most importantly I do not want any aliens."

"I'm an alien," he muttered.

"Please, Doctor?" she asked, her eyes as big around as saucers as she gazed up at him mournfully. "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

The Doctor looked straight at her for half a second, before shifting his gaze to the floor. The big brown eyes were winning again. He rubbed the back of his neck, and his expression squirmed between a wide range of emotions before he reluctantly nodded his head.

"Well,I suppose we could put up a few decorations," he said.

Rose bounced off her chair in sudden glee, throwing her arms around him.

"Thank you," she cried happily. "This is going to be so much fun, wait and see."

"Remember, just a few," the Doctor repeated, though it was weak even in his own ears. There would be no stopping the Jackie in her now.

* * *

Rose was sitting in one of the Tardis storerooms, surrounded by glittering tinsel, and colorful ornaments. She slowly sifted through the mess, choosing what she would need for her next project, the library. The kitchen was already covered in all things Christmas, and the Dining Hall, which they rarely even used, was filled out with holly and beautiful red table runners made in some odd planet that nobody knew quite where it was. Periodically, the Doctor would pop in his resigned head, and ultimately get stuck with a new job to work on. The funny thing was, every time he showed his face it grew less and less resigned and more and more cheerful as time went past. In fact, as he swaggered in the next time, he was humming carols to himself and smiling at absolutely nothing at all.

Rose smiled widely as soon as he slipped through the door, and cleared some space for him to sit. He carefully picked his way through the decorations littering the floor to settle down beside her.

"What happened to our grumpy time-lord?" she teased, bumping his shoulder with hers.

Immediately, the Doctor ceased humming, and scowled a terribly grumpy scowl. Rose only laughed and smoothed away the 'angry' wrinkling of his forehead with gentle fingers. He tried to hide his own laugh behind a grunt, but it poured through anyway, making a horrendous sound as it pushed through his throat. Naturally, this only made the two of them laugh harder until they were piled in a giggling, tangled mess. Still gasping for breath, the Doctor shook tinsel and false pine needles off his head, swiping a hand through his hair to find any hidden culprits.

"Here let me," Rose offered.

She began to pick the last few strands out before he could even manage a yes. She raised up a little on her knees to see the very top, carefully removing every last needle. However, that was very nearly impossible as no matter how many she took out another five replaced it. It took her nearly two minutes of frustrated tinsel removal before she realized it was tinsel from her own hair that was replacing his. She promptly fell back on her bottom, laughing at the absurdity of it all.

Now that the problem was properly identified, the Doctor and Rose began to help each other remove the offending decorations, laughing whenever their hands or heads bumped, perhaps to hide the blush rising quickly to their cheeks. And once when their lips brushed, completely by accident, it was easy to hide behind a chuckle. By the time their lips touched again, this time for much longer, their laughs were spent and the need to hide seemed distant and far away. The worlds stopped their turning and the universe stopped in it's track for that moment as Rose lost herself in his kiss. Time never trickled so slowly as it did in that most wonderful moment where laughing and playfulness turned to absolute tenderness in the kiss she shared with him. He pulled away, only to capture her lips again, as soon as she murmured his name.

Perhaps it was an hour, perhaps it was a day. Rose never could say. For years afterward, she would always maintain that time indeed had stopped for them. And who knows? Maybe it did. Even the Doctor admitted it was entirely possible. Still, however long it was, it marked a change, a turning point in not only Rose's life but the Doctor's as well. That night, that sweet kiss, shared in the spirit of Christmas, friendship, and love, entwined their lives more closely than even they could imagine. Rose had never felt so close to anyone in her life; she could almost see their heart's twisting and twining in a beautiful glorious dance, a bond of trust and love never to be broken through all of time.

And so when the Doctor asked that fateful question not long after, Rose already knew the answer written into her very soul. She would travel with him forever just as she would love him forever. The words fell quickly from her mouth without a thought, and his own promise echoed back just as quickly. He not only accepted her forever, he offered his in return. For them time had stopped, and for them time would grant them forever and always. Why? It's quite simple really. They were the Doctor and Rose; they were the stuff of legend.


	32. Chapter 32: From the Heart

DISCLAIMER: I WISHED UPON A STAR, BUT I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO

**A/N**_** Sorry, I didn't update yesterday. I was more busy than expected. However, I should have time tomorrow to post so no worries. I might, emphasis on the might, be able to update again later tonight but I highly doubt it. **_**  
**_**Anyway, **_**From the Heart **_**by **_**Hoobastank **_**is the song. I'm actually really, really pleased with today's chapter especially considering the last one. I hope you like it in any case. Not a whole lot else to say. Merry Christmas, again. :-) **_

**From the Heart**

The Doctor threw open the Tardis doors, grinning madly at the snow covered landscape before him. About a mile away, the village huts were glistening with a coat of frost, and the trees were drooping with snow. He looked over his shoulder to watch impatiently as Rose pulled on a pair of warm boots. He was strangely fascinated by her hands, swiftly working on the laces. She was really quite graceful, he decided, even when she was tying shoe laces. Out of nowhere he had the urge to take her ice skating, which was quite convenient considering their location.

"C'mon Rose," he said, extending his hand towards her. "We haven't got all day, you know."

She stuck out her tongue, and pulled her arms through the sleeves of her coat.

"Some of us actually bother to change our outfits, and wear protection from the cold." Rose retorted.

He retracted his hand, looking convincingly affronted. "I change clothes!"

"Oh, you're wearing a green shirt instead of blue today. I'm so proud of you." Her voice was biting, but her smile and laugh hat followed was anything but mean. "You should at least wear a coat or something, though."

The Doctor just grinned and swung his brown trench coat in answer. Rose rolled her eyes, clearly unimpressed. She grabbed the multicolored scarf from beside her, though it still trailed behind her as she walked. She swung it around his neck, and he, though it surprised even himself, let her. In fact, he merely stood calmly and enjoyed her silent care as she carefully wrapped and knotted it it for him.

"I _am not_ taking care of a sick time-lord again," Rose explained.

" I won't get sick, I promise," the Doctor said, catching her hand in his.

They left the Tardis, stepping out into the bright sun reflected on the crisp snow. Rose burrowed into his side as the first bit of cold hit her. His arm wrapped around her waist, hugging her tightly. It was all for the sake of keeping her frail human body warm, of course. It didn't matter that her closeness stirred his insides into very tricky gymnastics, certainly not. That was just a... pleasant byproduct.

"Remind me what we're doing here?" Rose asked, her voice muffled by the excess scarf which she had apparently decided to borrow.

The Doctor glanced down at her, his eyes alight with... with the sting of winter surely, not anything else like say... oh... attraction and love. He blinked once, and he felt himself settling back into normalcy. No attraction and _definitely_ no love. She was Rose and he was the Doctor and they were... what _were_ they doing here? He couldn't actually remember the original reason, and seeing as it was clearly unimportant enough to be forgotten, they might as well go ice skating right away.

"We're going ice skating," he said.

She looked up at him, her eyebrows quirked in slight surprise. "That's not what you said this morning."

"Didn't I?" the Doctor asked lightly. "Well change of plans then. Forget what I said this morning, that's what I did."

Rose laughed, a singularly most bright and beautiful sound. He laughed too, finding it just slightly interesting, the way their bodies expanded with air in tandem. He could feel the swell of her ribs even through the several layers separating them, and it felt terribly good. Out of nowhere, he wondered what it would feel like to sing together, and feel their combined vibrations resonate through him. An experiment for another day perhaps, for they were fast approaching the little town of fur clad people.

"Do you think they even have ice skates?" Rose whispered as a few of the men came out to greet them.

"How should I know?" he whispered back. He wasn't expecting the smack of her elbow against his side for an answer.

"Welcome,"said a big burly man with fiery red hair and a matching beard. "Do you plan to stay long with us?"

"Just for the day," the Doctor replied. His voice was laced with the slightest bit of pain, and he dearly hoped Rose heard it. She ought to feel at least the tiniest bit guilty for whacking him.

The man nodded, and made a series of quick gestures to the boy at his side. The boy signed a few things in return, muttered a yes, and scampered off to the village without another word. Another man, both younger and smaller than the first, with raven black hair restrained in a ponytail, turned to them with an open smile.

"You chose a good day to come. It is a festival day."

His voice was full and excited, and his eyes lingered on Rose. The Doctor's arm instinctively tightened around her. Rose smiled politely but she showed no further interest much to his relief. Though why that mattered at all, he could not say. He pushed away the possibility of jealousy before the thought was even fully formed. He was not jealous in any way, shape or form. That was the most ridiculous idea ever. Well... maybe, _maybe _he had been very mildly jealous of Mickey... and Adam... and Jack. But honestly that didn't count. That had been so mild it couldn't even register on the scale of jealousy. It was so mild that...

"Doctor?" Rose asked hesitantly.

"Hmm? What?" the Doctor asked. He nearly jumped, but her gentle hand on his arm kept him relatively calm.

"Kelton said we can ice skate whenever."

"Oh right, ice skating," he said. His thoughts slowly fell back into place and it wasn't long before he was his usual bubbly self, even more so because of the snow and awakening cold and maybe a little, tiny bit because of Rose laughter lit eyes.

The rink was big and scarcely populated, which left plenty of room for the Doctor and Rose to mess around a great deal. Snow flew between the two of them, and occasionally hit an innocent bystander who would then join in for a few minutes, before withdrawing. They dragged each other around with the football field long scarf, and towed a few younger children along as well. The afternoon was spent in good fun for anyone and everyone, and Rose was indeed graceful even at play.

When they finally tired, the Doctor reached for Rose's hand. She squeezed it and they smoothly glided around and around again. His heart's were beating loud and fast in his chest, but he felt completely at peace. He knew it had nothing to do with Rose, but at the moment he was exhausted from a full day of excuse making to come up with viable alternative. So he simply let it stand as, 'it was not due to Rose.'

The sun was slowly sinking closer and closer to the horizon, and the remaining skaters gradually filed off to the festival feast. The Doctor turned to Rose, about to ask if she wanted to stay and eat or return to the Tardis. He stopped before he uttered a word, completely entranced by the girl beside him. Her eyes were closed in perfect serenity, and her lips were slightly parted, allowing the misty breath to slip out. Her snow-glazed hair, shone in the light of the setting sun. He caught his breath, his mind void of any any thought besides the one that whispered in awe that Rose was absolutely and unquestioningly the most beautiful woman he had ever known or ever would know.

Rose's eyes flew open as if she could sense his heavy gaze. She didn't say a word, just looked at him with open eyes sparkling with two parts joy three parts... love? He blinked, both surprised and confused. Was she really in love with him? That was new. Or was it? His thoughts were flying all over the place and he was sure it showed on his face. Rose's hand reached up to tenderly touch his cheek as if to bring him back to the present and help focus his thoughts. His internal flurry stilled, but so did really any thought at all, up until the moment Rose's lips touched his. Well, in all actuality his thoughts did not again think until after the kiss was over. Rose settled back onto her feet, and he briefly wondered how she had managed tiptoe on ice skates. He looked at her in slight shock, but he could feel a smile creeping slowly across his features. He really wanted to kiss her again.

"Where did that come from?" the Doctor asked.

Rose smiled, snuggling into his side. His arms naturally found their way around her and he nuzzled her hair still glowing in the fading light. He had begun to think she wouldn't answer when the muffled reply finally came.

"It came from the heart."


	33. Chapter 33: Gone

DISCLAIMER: MAYBE I'LL GET THE DVD'S FOR CHRISTMAS, BUT PROBABLY NOT THE RIGHTS.

**A/N **_**I think I may go hide in a hole and die. Why? You might ask. Well... I'm really frustrated with this chapter and I don't like it at all, but maybe you'll like it anyway. I'm so sorry, I really tried honestly I did. Tomorrow's should be pretty good though, so maybe I can redeem myself. **_**  
**_**The song is **_**Gone **_**by **_**Kelly Clarkson?**_**I'm not sure is that's the right artist as I don't have my list with me, and I'm too lazy to go get it. Doesn't matter much though.  
Oh, this one was originally going to be written for starrynight101 for being my 100 reviewer (awhile ago) but because it turned out not like I wanted it, I'll probably write another one for her. She requested Doctor angst with a reunion. Why am I even mentioning this then, if it's not really her chapter? I don't know. I felt like babbling I suppose.**_

**Gone**

The Doctor held the soft pink rose up to his face, rubbing the velvet petals against his cheek. He took a deep, shuddering breath of it's heady scent, so like the smell that used to follow her like a sweet cloud. A single crystalline tear made it's slow path down his cheek, settling on the crisp white paper attached to the stem. He glanced at the words and another tear slipped out.

_Merry Christmas, Doctor. Wish you were here._

_Love you,_

_Rose _

* * *

Pete lifted Tony up to hang a shiny red bulb on the tree, Mickey fiddled with the sound system as he tried to provide them with Christmas music, and Jackie was just hanging mistletoe over the arched door way. Rose watched with a strange mix of sadness and joy. Joy to see her family safe and happy, sadness at the person missing from the picture. She fingered the Tardis key still hanging around her neck, barely holding back her tears. She had a family, she had a good job, and she was by no means wanting for money or really any material thing, but she didn't have the Doctor anymore. Her hours felt like days and her days felt like weeks, without him by her side. The only thing that kept her going was the hope that the dimension cannon would start working. She had symbolically sent a a gift through earlier that day, but the likelihood of it actually getting though was something like .2%. Still, she thrived on that .2.

* * *

"I don't understand," Donna said as she looked at the rose sitting innocently on the kitchen table. "How did it get here?"

The Doctor shrugged, though a smile was beginning to show on his face.

"I don't know, but I intend to find out."

* * *

Christmas Eve dinner at the Tyler's was just beginning when the sharp ding of the doorbell interrupted their meal. Pete complained about it being dinner time and Jackie just rolled her eyes and told him to eat his food. No one moved to get the door, which still caught Rose by surprise even after two years of living there. The idea of a butler answering the door was so foreign to her. She strained her ears, trying to catch the conversation over the noise of Tony's incessant talking. What she heard, sent her heart into a mad frenzy.

"Shh, Mum listen," Rose said.

Mickey clapped a hand over Tony's mouth and they all listened for half a second. In the second half, Rose was up and racing down the hall. She stopped at the top of the stairs, a wide smile blossoming across her face to see The Doctor hopelessly arguing with the butler.

"Doctor," she said, her voice a cross between a sob and a shout.

The Doctor looked up immediately, catching her eyes right off. A smile split his face, and Rose couldn't wait any longer. She flew down the stairs, the first few tears pouring down her cheeks. He caught her up in his arms and crushed her in a half-crazed hug. She pulled away, taking his appearance in hungrily as if just the sight of him could feed her for an eternity. Laughter spewed from her throat, genuine, joyful laughter.

"Merry Christmas, Rose," the Doctor said before he swooped in to capture her lips in his own.


	34. Chapter 34: Haven't Met You Yet

DISCLAIMER: I GET SICK OF SAYING IT, BUT I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Sorry, I didn't get this up on Christmas. It was a lot longer than I planned on. **_**  
**_**Well we're going straight from G to H with**__**, **_**Haven't Met You Yet**_** by **_**Michael Buble.**_** I'm actually really proud of this one. It's slightly based off of one of Jessa L'Rynn's stories. Um... I'll leave another little explanation about that on the bottom. Also, Theta, Kosch**__**ei**__** and Ushas were the Doctor's, the Master's, and the Rani's childhood names respectively. At least according to Wikipedia.  
I hope you like it!**_

**Haven't Met You Yet**

Rose was settled on a bench, observing her family Christmas party. The younger cousins were playing tag all around the gym, and the aunts and uncles sat in a huddle around a table chatting about absolutely nothing at all. The early teenage girls were hiding somewhere else in the building, no doubt sharing vitally important secrets, and the boys were sulking in the corner. The other cousins around her age were congregating by the door preparing to leave and find something better to do. Mo waved at her, throwing a pleading look. Rose glanced at Jackie as if to reassure herself that her mum was in good hands before slipping away with the others.

Outside snow was falling and Rose almost regretted going. She loved the snow, really, she did. It was the cold that always accompanied it that she didn't like. Still, she pulled her coat tight around her, smashed a hat on over her ears, and followed the others as they wandered through the icy streets. Mo kept pace with her, telling her all the details of her new relationship. Rose listened in with half her brain, but the other half was far too preoccupied with the falling snow and the few stars visible between the clouds.

Rose stepped out onto the next street, sliding her feet idly along the snow pack, not even paying attention to anything around her by that point. She didn't even spare a glance at the car further down. It would stop. Cars always stopped. A scream, Mo's scream, split the air, fighting for dominance over the squeal of tires on ice. In slow motion, she looked once at Mo, still on the sidewalk, her voice desperately calling out her name, then at the car spinning out of control. She was frozen, too scared to move but to flinch in anticipation of the impact. The impact came, but not from the car. A body from the other side of the street slammed into her, pulling her out of the car's path at the last instance.

Rose crashed to the ground, tangling with the other person as she fell. Stunned, she made no attempt to stand or even untangle herself. She looked at her rescuer, dark serious eyes set in a strong youthful face with black hair and a single white streak running above his ear. His breath was fast and ragged, matching hers exactly as their combined fear turned to relief at the realization that they both were alive. Their hearts beat in perfect rhythm, though there was a strange echo that held it all together. His eyes shut, and he sighed, perhaps to release the tension of adrenaline.

"That was close," he said, as he managed to gain his feet, helping her up in the process.

"Yeah," Rose answered weakly. "I'd probably be dead without you."

He grinned and opened his mouth to answer but Mo drowned him out.

"Rose!" she yelled, running towards them. "Rose, are you okay? Should I call an ambulance? Are you hurt?"

The other cousins followed her, expressing their fear and worry in such a cacophony of noise as to give Rose a far worse head ache than even hitting her head on the ground, which she conveniently had not done, would have. The dark haired bloke stood awkwardly off to the side, quite unsure what to do with himself until someone, a boy with fair hair, called out to him. They spoke in quiet voices to one another before turning to go. The dark one looked back at Rose, catching her eye. He smiled and waved his hand before turning his back.

Rose suddenly felt the desperate need to go after him. She silenced her cousins, running off before they could do anything but stare at her retreating form. She caught up to the boys fairly quickly much to her relief.

"Wait," she called.

They turned, the dark one grinning to see her running towards them. The blonde watched her with a strange intensity, his eyes openly curious as if he were baby surveying a new environment. Rose paused to catch her breath and he, the one who saved her, rested a hand on her shoulder as if to ask if she was all right.

"I didn't get to thank you or even ask your name," Rose explained, though she knew her real reason was far more complicated.

"You're welcome," he said with genuine sincerity. "And my name... well it's Theta, believe it or not. This is my friend Koschei. Although I guess... you could call me the Doctor."

"Oh, don't start that again," Koschei complained. "You are not the Doctor anymore than I am the Master. If you're going to give her a false name that's easier on the ears and the head just say something like John Smith."

"John Smith?" Theta asked, with a quirked eyebrow. "Isn't that a little, I don't know, ordinary? I mean the Doctor... now that's an impressive name. It's all mysterious and powerful."

Koschei snorted derisively, but Rose just laughed.

"I like it," she announced.

Theta looked at her in surprise, smiling brightly. "Which one?The Doctor or John Smith?"

"Both," Rose replied. "Either/or. I like Theta too. They all suit you."

Theta smiled even wider than before."Thanks," he muttered, blushing slightly.

"Aren't you going to ask her name?" Koschei asked, while rolling his eyes.

"It's Rose," she said, to which both of them smiled.

"I like it," they said in unison, which resulted in an exchange of glares.

Rose offered a quiet thank you after which it was silent. They all three stood in a somewhat circle, not saying a word, each feeling both awkward and comfortable at once. Koschei pulled out glowing metal mass of wires that he wove into strange patterns and shapes. Rose quietly wondered where he had gotten such a thing, but she had a surprising lack of curiosity, at least towards him. Rather, her curiosity was directed more at Theta. He stood fairly close to her, and yet he couldn't seem to look at her. Instead, his eyes gravitated to the ground, where his feet mindlessly drew things in the loose snow. Or at least at first glance it seemed mindless.

After watching for close to two minutes, Rose could see what had looked like pointless circles were quite possibly responses to the equally pointless circles Koschei was devising with his hands. All at once, she could see the swirls were a sort of conversation. Koschei signed something out and Theta would answer. It was fast moving with very short breaks if any at all. Rose could tell who was 'speaking' but she couldn't understand what they said. As she watched their faces, she caught flashes of emotion which helped tell at least the tenor of the conversation. She was surprised at how often their eyes flicked to her. If she had to guess, she would say they were talking about her.

"How do you do that?" Rose finally asked, breaking the silence.

They both looked up at her, clearly surprised. The secret conversation came to a complete stop, and Koschei pocketed the ball. She looked at them expectantly, waiting for her answer. When she was met with stares, she clarified.

"The talking with symbols,"she said. "How do you do that? Where did you learn?"

"You saw that?" Theta asked, his voice incredulous. "You knew what was going on?"

"The real question is, how did _you_ do that?" Koschei asked. His eyes were hungry with curiosity again, and Rose wanted to hide. Didn't his parents ever tell him not to stare?

"I told you she was different," Theta said.

"Of course she's different," Koschei replied haughtily. "Any fool can see that just by looking at her. She practically glows with suppressed power."

"You only saw it after I told you," Theta shot back. "She has a sort of perception filter on I think. You have to know what you're looking for to see the power."

"Then, why did you see it?"

Theta shook his head. "I don't know."

Rose just looked on helplessly. She almost preferred their silent exchanged to this confusing dialogue. Not a word of their discussion made sense to her beyond her own name. No matter how they spoke it seemed she was doomed to not understand. Her first instinct was to sink into confusion and leave it all alone. Her second, stronger instinct was to scream at them to shut up and explain. She decided on a middle road.

"Aren't you going to answer me?" She looked primarily at Theta as it helped distract her from Koschei's strong gaze.

His eyes softened and his lips curled with amusement as he spoke. "Sorry, you just surprised us. Not many people catch on to what we do. We... learned it at school. It's kind of a different sort of school. We're actually here on a field trip."

"Over Christmas break?" Rose said, doubt coating her every word.

Theta shrugged, but Koschei answered. "Like he said. It's a very different kind of school."

"We ran away," Theta said brightly, proudly.

"You ran away," Koschei corrected. "I came looking for you."

Theta smiled, "He has a point."

By now, Rose knew she should be closing up with confusion and denial like any other sensible human, but suddenly all she wanted was to know more. She should have been scared or at the very least worried. They could be psychotic killers, who set up the almost accident just to gain her trust, or a couple of crazies who escaped from an insane asylum. But she didn't think about either of those possibilities. She instinctively trusted them, or at least she trusted Theta. Koschei's open curiosity frightened her, but she knew he wouldn't hurt her either.

"Theta! Koschei!" a voice called from down the street.

In the same fluid motion, all three of them turned to see a lithe girl with straight dark hair streaming behind her as she ran towards them. She came to a stop, throwing her arms first around Koschei and then Theta. A sharp pang of jealousy shot through Rose's stomach, and she almost tackled the girl right then and there.

"Who's this?" the girl asked, her eyes narrowed as she regarded Rose.

"This is Rose," Theta said, and Rose was pleased at how protective he sounded.

She sniffed. "A bit ordinary, isn't she?"

"Anything, but," Theta said, laughing.

"Look again," Koschei suggested. "See anything shiny."

Rose stood stock still as the other girl scrutinized her. Her eyes opened wide and she gasped loudly.

"Rassilon, she's bright!" she exclaimed. "What did you do to her?"

"Nothing," Koschei said. "That's the way she is. Someone put a perception filter on her."

"And something else too," the girl said, her voice filled with awe.

She gestured at something on Rose's cheek. Rose immediately clapped a hand over her cheek, feeling for something that wasn't there. The girl had to be mistaken; there wasn't anything on her cheek.

"It's okay, Rose,"' Theta said softly, trying to calm her sudden worry. "Ushas is talking about... well it's similar to your glow. You can't see it, and neither can anyone else besides us. We see things most people don't. It's not something to be scared of, I promise.

Rose nodded, but her heart still pounded fearfully. Now, both Koschei and Ushas were staring at her. It quite truthfully was starting to scare her. She kept her hand on her face, hoping it would discourage their looking.

"Can I see, Rose?" Theta asked. He met her eyes, his gaze silently promising he wouldn't hurt her, that he would keep her safe.

She nodded again, feeling slightly numb. His hand gently rested on top of hers and he squeezed it reassuringly, before placing it back down at her side. His hand rose again to touch her cheek, tracing some invisible pattern along her skin. She shivered under his touch, loving the way his fingers skimmed across her skin, light as a warm summer breeze. Their eyes met, and she was surprised at what she saw in his. He looked at her with such power, so full of feeling. She had never seen such emotion in a single look before.

"Write it down Theta," Ushas said excitedly. "We can look up whose mark it is when we go home."

"That won't be necessary," Theta replied, his voice barely a whisper. "I know whose mark it is already."

"Whose?" she asked, bouncing up on her heels.

Theta's foot began tracing in the snow, the same pattern he had trailed his finger across Rose's cheek. His eyes never left hers, and she shook with the intensity between them.

Ushas gasped again, and even Koschei caught his breath in surprise. Rose didn't know whose mark it was or even what a 'mark' meant, but whoever and whatever it was it shocked them all into silence, and inspired Theta's sudden intensity. All this and the surging feeling inside her told her it was Theta's mark on her cheek. The very thought caused her heart to burn in her chest and her soul to sing out with joy. She didn't even know him, but there was no else whose mark she would rather carry.

"The ship is leaving in a few minutes," Ushas said. "We have to go."

"You and Koschei go one ahead," Theta said. "There's a few things I have to tell Rose."

Ushas nodded and turned to go. Koschei touched Theta's shoudler and kissed Rose's cheek.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, before he too left them.

Rose watched them go, feeling sadness overwhelm her. They were leaving and Theta would go too.

"That school of yours must be really, really different," Rose said quietly, tears filling her eyes.

"Yeah," he said. "It's... different."

"I don't even know you, but I don't want to let you go," she whispered, scared of the powerful emotions welling up inside her.

"That's the mark," he explained. "It ties us together across all of time and space. I think we'll fall in love every time we meet. Sometimes it will be fast and inexplicable like this, other times it will be gradual and long, but it will always happen.

"We'll meet again, then?" Rose asked.

"Oh yes,"Theta replied, smiling broadly. "I still have to put the filter and the mark on you at some point."

"You say we'll fall in love again, won't we remember this though?"

Theta's expression grew pained, and tears filled his eyes. He shook his head.

"No, I'll have Koschei take my memories of the mark and perception filter so that all I remember about you is a beautiful wonderful girl whose life I saved," he paused his voice too tight to continue. "I... I have to block the memories in your mind too."

"Why?" Rose asked, tears falling down her cheeks.

"Because I haven't met you yet. This wasn't supposed to be our first meeting. It was an accidental side effect of our real first meeting." Theta said.

"But it's not fair," she cried.

"I know."

Rose fell into his arms, crying into his shoulder. She could feel his tears on her hair, which only made her cry harder. She didn't understand half of what was going on, but what she did understand she didn't like. He was leaving her and she wouldn't see him again for who knows how long. On top of that, when she met him, she wouldn't even know it was him. Some kind of Merry Christmas that was.

Finally, Theta pulled away, and met Rose's eyes with tenderness.

"You ready?" he asked, putting his fingers to her temples.

Whimpering, she nodded. He closed his eyes, and started his search in her mind to find all the many thoughts and impressions that had to be locked away. She helped him as best she could, but she was too much of an emotional mess to be much help at all. When he finished the job, she was left only with the memory him waving goodbye after saving her life.

Rose collapsed into Theta's arms when he withdrew. He was hesitant to leave her unconscious in the cold empty streets, but she would wake up in less than five minutes anyway. He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and then to her lips.

"Goodbye, Rose," he murmured. "Have a Merry Christmas. You made mine."

* * *

Rose returned to the party, feeling out of sorts and missing something that she never had to begin with. Mo ran to her side, asking if she ever found the guy. Rose sadly shook her head. No, she didn't ever catch up to him. She honestly believed herself when she said that. But on snowy winter nights, she dreamed of a boy named Theta who spoke with symbols and loved her beyond the rules of time. And a year later, in the basement of Henrik's the hand that caught hers was familiar and she felt almost as if she he had known him before.

* * *

**A/N _So just a quick explanation of the similarities between Jess__a L'Rynn's__ story and mine. She uses time traces whereas I used suppressed powe__r, specifically that of __the Bad Wolf. Theoretically the power would exist simultaneously in all points of time, but it was merely suppressed before and after the actual happening. Her other things was the mark, which basically said Rose was the Doctor's mate. I kind of went with that and used it for my own purposes. I hope nobody minds my slight borrowing of her ideas. She was quite brilliant to think it up in the first place. _**


	35. Chapter 35: Heart Never Lies

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO, AT ALL.

**A/N **_**I'm terribly sorry that this took so long. I'm hoping to have another one up though tomorrow. The song is **_**Heart Never Lies **_**by **_**Mcfly **_**which I think really, really goes well with the Doctor and Rose.  
Anyway, this one is inspired by the line in The Runaway Bride (Episode One of Season Three) when the Doctor tells Donna "I can't cross personal time lines... apparently." I wanted my chapter to follow that. I didn't quite get what I wanted, but I'm going to come back and tweak a little sometime so that it fits the line a little bit better. Oh, and Ethera is just my own character I made up for this particular chapter, strictly uncanonical. **_

**Heart Never Lies**

The Doctor shut the Tardis doors behind him, staring forlornly at the console. He trudged slowly up the ramp, each step heavy and painful. The silence weighed him down as never before. If he closed his eyes, he could see her sitting on the captain's chair or leaning idly on the rail, but the minute he opened his eyes... it only hurt more at the realization that she wasn't there. She wasn't going to be there ever again. Gone were the walks in the Tardis gardens, the adventures spent running on pure adrenaline, the breathless kisses in the kitchen before dinner, and the lazy days spent on their favorite hill topped with apple grass. It was all gone, stolen in a single blinding instant.

The Doctor sighed and it seemed to him the Tardis echoed it back sadly. The light of the rotor seemed dim in comparison with just a few hours before. He wasn't the only one who was mourning the loss of Rose. He patted a coral column, sympathizing with his dear ship.

"You miss her too," he stated simply. Beneath his hand, he felt a bleak wave of loneliness and distress roll over him; the Tardis had liked her even more than he imagined.

The Doctor shut his eyes again, resting his head against the column. Deep breathes, kept the tears from falling, but inside his whole body ached with pain. He thought losing her wouldn't hurt this bad, not after everything else he had lost. He was wrong, again. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Eyes still shut, he banged his head three times, yelling aloud. That's when the tears begin to fall, and with them anger. Two minutes of pure agony and flaming rage and his eyes flashed open, burning with the fury of a time lord. He could sense the Tardis, uneasy and reluctant to follow his guiding hand, but she did none the less. The landing was rough, and sparks flared up in protest. He thrust open the doors, not entirely sure where or when he was, but knowing _she _would be there.

He stepped out into a world of shifting atmospheric colors, instantly remembering the day and half they spent, flying kites with the young colonists and saving the world from a regiment of misplaced Sontarans. He could see the upward spiraling city in the distance, and in the surrounding hills the kite fliers roamed. The plan was simple really, the other Doctor, sensing the Tardis's unexpected presence would surely slip away to investigate, leaving Rose alone and vulnerable to... was it kidnapping if she loved him and came willingly?

The Doctor set off, purposely circling unnecessarily wide to ensure he didn't run into his previous self along the way. As he walked, he began to really think about the consequences of taking Rose. He was breaking more rules than he could count just by being there and he was going to break a lot more. For the first time in his life, the rules ceased to matter, though. If he could just be with Rose... then he would follow the rules. In the very back of his head, he knew he was being irrational, dangerously irrational. He didn't dare listen to that voice. Without his anger, without Rose, he didn't know what he would be.

Almost halfway there, the Doctor felt a soft hand on his arm and a quiet voice murmured his name. Turning, his eyes opened wide at the sight before him. In a dress of iridescent blue to match her silver blue hair brushing the ground, stood a woman he had not seen for... a very long time. Admittedly, it was never a good sign she was there, but at the same time he craved the connection it brought with his people.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" she asked, her voice warm and amused with just the slightest hint of reproof.

The Doctor looked into her eyes, glowing with knowledge and power. Her eyes were gentle, understanding as if she knew his pain. Perhaps she did. Time lords live an awfully long time but Eternals... well they live forever. Surely they had to lose people sometimes.

"I need her," the Doctor whispered. "Ethera, please."

"Doctor, you don't need my permission," she said, shaking her head. "I'm not here to stop you."

"Then what _are _you here for?" he asked.

Ethera smiled and met his eyes evenly. "I'm here to remind you who you are. You're the Doctor, the last time lord in existence. You carry the noble heritage of your people and your planet. You protect the universe and help those who cannot help themselves. And she... she is Rose Tyler, a brave girl of the Powell Estate who loves you dearly and who is set on saving the universe in whatever way she can. You know what she would want you to do, figure it out."

The Doctor watched and listened as she spoke, tears finding their way down his cheeks. She was right, he knew she was. When her hand wrapped around his, he grasped it gratefully. It wasn't Rose's and it didn't fit perfectly with his, but it was a hand to hold. But perhaps that was enough. Maybe he didn't need to have Rose with him to keep loving her or to keep him going. If he could just find another hand to hold he could make it through. And as for loving her... that would never go away. His hearts told him so and the heart,or hearts as the case may be, doesn't lie.


	36. Chapter 36: Hero

DISCLAIMER: I'VE GOT MY FINGERS CROSSED, BUT FOR NOW I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**So apparently when I say tomorrow, I really mean three weeks. I'm really sorry, I was going to post this sooner, but I kind of got banned from the computer again. I finished writing as soon as I was allowed back on. Anyway, this one is **_**Hero **_**by **_**Enrique Iglesias. **_**It's different than I planned, but I actually like it better. It's a little bit jumpy-ish I think, but I still like it a lot. I'm hoping to have another chapter up on Monday, but I can't make any promises. **_

**Hero**

Rose curled into the corner of the couch, her feet tucked neatly beside her and a well worn book nestled in her hand. The fireplace was glowing brightly even though there was no need on account of the Tardis maintaining a perfect temperature. She had the old fashioned record player going across the room to enhance the mood. All in all, it was a perfect evening for relaxing and enjoying the book she had found on the Doctor's personal shelf. Or at least it was a perfect evening until the Doctor's pitiful cries sounded through the walls.

Rose rolled her eyes and opened up her book, more than happy to ignore the Doctor. Five minutes later, when his cries still had not subsided she found it was a much less happy circumstance. With a resigned sigh, she snapped the book shut and abandoned her comfortable spot. The Tardis hummed sympathetically, but that was hardly helpful to anyone. Rose trudged down the hall, muttering any number of insults under her breath. She thrust the Doctor's door open and her jaw dropped at the sight before her.

On a bed of twisted, scattered sheets, the Doctor lay sniffling sadly. His shirt was wrinkled almost beyond recognition, the buttons not in their proper holes, and some not in the holes at all. He hadn't even attempted to locate his suit pants and instead wore the ruffled shirt over a pair of blue pajama bottoms decorated with little glowing Tardises. His hair was not the casual sticky-uppy look she was used to. Rather, it looked like someone had brushed it the wrong way and left it in a large fluffy mess. His eyes were red and streaming to match his nose. In other words, he was one very sick time lord.

Rose had prepared an angry speech, but her glare softened into amused compassion. She smiled and pushed through the pile of ties on the floor to sit beside the Doctor. She ran a gentle hand through his furry mane of hair, smoothing it out until it was passably good looking. He groaned pathetically, but it sounded less genuine than just a few minutes before. She smiled to herself, pleased that even her simple presence made him feel better.

"Rose," he moaned, his voice stuffy. "I think I have a cold."

She laughed. "I think you're right."

She rested a hand on his forehead, grimacing at the sweltering heat of his skin. "I think you also have a fever."

"Oh, perfect," he muttered, and flopped back on his pillows. "I haven't been sick in... well I guess I got regeneration sickness, but that doesn't count."

"If that doesn't count, what does?" Rose asked with a smile.

He shrugged. "This."

The Doctor settled deeper into the pillows, his eyes shut tightly. His face was crinkled with discomfort and Rose's heart went out to him. Poor, poor Doctor. It was rare sight to see him so vulnerable. Rose lightly caressed his hot skin, a little surprised when his hand came up to press hers against his cheek.

"That feels good," He murmured.

The Doctor turned his head just slightly to press a kiss into her palm. If that surprised Rose, it was nothing to the surprise she got, when he tugged her down until she was laying by his side. She froze when his arms wrapped around her, but as he nuzzled her hair, she gradually relaxed. If he could only hold her close when he was deathly ill, then she would take sickness any day.

Thinking along the same lines the Doctor said, "The only nice thing about being sick is, I can do something like this and pass it off as delirium when I get better."

"There's a flaw in your plan," Rose said. "by telling me this, I know perfectly well that's its a premeditated, conscious decision rather than delirium."

He laughed into her hair, sending tingles into the tips of her toes. "I'd hardly say it was premeditated. That's where the sickness part comes in; it makes me terribly impulsive."

"No one ever said impulsiveness was bad," Rose whispered quietly.

His eyes opened briefly to lock on hers, and she could see the pain this single moment of closeness was bringing him. Because he could never allow them to have another moment like this, what should have been pure joy turned bittersweet. And that was what impulsiveness cost him, cost them. One step forward, two steps back.

"I'm sorry," Rose said.

"No, I'm sorry. This isn't fair of me," he said, his voice laced with anger at himself. "Tomorrow, this will be gone, and you'll probably have gotten sick too."

"Isn't it worth it though?" she asked, looking at him earnestly. "Better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all, right?"

The Doctor sighed, sadly and rested his forehead against hers. His arms tightened around her, and she could feel each shuddering breath he took, each unsteady beat of his hearts. Rose's cheeks were wet, though whether her own tears or the Doctor's she wasn't sure. Probably both.

"I can love from a distance," he whispered, his voice shaking. "I have to Rose, you know why."

"But what if_ I_ can't," she answered. "I can't be as strong as you."

The Doctor sighed again, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Maybe that's just it. Maybe I'm the weak one and you're the strong one. Maybe I'm just being a coward, running away from everything."

Silence followed his words. If Rose said yes, she was the strong one, the Doctor might give in, but then he would be hurt in the long run. If she said no, he would push her away, and they would both suffer silently, but get over it eventually. Or would they? Maybe they were all ready so in love it would actually hurt worse to keep pretending. Time passed slowly as Rose poured over her thoughts. Beside her the Doctor was getting restless, just waiting for her to speak.

"Say something," he said. "Tell me what to do. Because I don't know anymore. I used to think I knew what was best, but lately I'm not so sure."

"I think..." she paused. "I think you should go to sleep. Neither of us are going to think very clearly if you're sick as a dog. In the morning, if you're better, then we'll figure it out, I promise."

"And tonight?"

Rose stilled, not quite sure what to do. It would probably be best if she left, but snuggled in his arms as she was, she couldn't bring herself to go.

"Tonight, I'm staying here," she said. "Someone's got to take care of you after all."

The Doctor smiled, tugging a hand through her hair.. "Thanks."

She kissed his hand, then his shoulder. "Your welcome."

Safe in the Doctor's arms, Rose felt herself falling into sleep, even though he was the one who was sick and really should have been sleeping. It was funny; she was taking care of him, but she felt as if he were really the one taking care of her. Just as she was fading into blackness, she felt the Doctor's lips brush against her ear as he whispered softly.

"You're my hero." Dimly, Rose realized he thought she was asleep and he was admitting that she was the strong one, that it was indeed much better to use the time they had. Whether, he stood by that decision in the morning, she would have to see, but for now it was enough. The very last thing she knew before she succumbed to sleep was the Doctor whispering one last thing.

"I love you, Rose."


	37. Chapter 37: Hold On

DISCLAIMER: WHAT DO YOU THINK? OH, YOU GUESSED IT. I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_** Well it is a Monday... yeah... that's my tail you see dragging behind my legs. Sorry. Anyway, this one is **_**Hold On **_**by **_**Michael Bubl****é****. **_**I really like this one. It's dedicated to my dear friend who loves the meta-crisis. I love him too, but we all know he and Rose will have a happily ever after(if a little shaky to begin with) so I rarely see a point in writing about them. Anyway, here's to you, kid. :-) **_

**Hold On**

The Doctor settled into the soft seat of the car, gazing out at the rainy world feeling more than a little out of place. Three weeks in Pete's world, and he still felt terribly unsure. He couldn't get used to the missing weight in his chest, an empty hallow where his second heart used to be. He didn't like traveling in cars in the crowded traffic and he liked traveling by slow moving zeppelins even less. He hated the way 'Doctor John Smith' felt dry in his throat, always two seconds too slow. It was his name now, but it didn't feel like his name. Rose suggested he might choose another one, but he was too tired, too lost to try for anything farther away from everything he used to be. His head hurt and he missed the Tardis.

Beside him, Rose shifted until she was comfortable in the driver's seat. The Doctor waited silently for her to start the car, but when several moments passed he glanced over to find her watching him intently. Their eyes locked and the Doctor was surprised to see his own sadness mirrored in her gaze. She reached a hand out to him, clasping his gently. He squeezed her hand, feeling the tiniest bit better. He was a shell of the Old Doctor, but at least his hand wasn't empty, at least he still had her.

"You don't have to go," she whispered. "We can wait longer if you want."

"Why?" he said sadly. "It's could only get worse from here on. I've got to go someday or go crazy."

Rose shook her head, looking away. "Do you honestly think this is the solution, Doctor? Is Torchwood really going to help? What if just magnifies what you've lost, what you can't do anymore?"

The Doctor felt her sudden tenseness and he worried she would drop his hand. He clung to her tighter, knowing that if she let go, she might let go forever.

"I don't know, anymore." he murmured. "But I can't face life like this anymore. Everyday, I feel as if I'm really asleep waiting to wake. I... I don't know if I can live a life this."

Tears were streaming down her face now, and he knew it was his fault. He was falling, and he was dragging her down with him.

"You told me once, that a normal life with me was the one adventure you could never have. But when you said it, I think there was never anything you wanted more," she said. "What happened to that man? Is the adventure not as good as you thought? Is human life not up to your standards?"

"No," he exclaimed. "Rose, that's not—"

"No?" she cried, her eyes flashing dangerously. "I don't believe you anymore! I love you! Why can't that be enough? Why are you set on trying to live your old life? Why can't you be happy with me?"

Rose tore her hand from his grasp, reaching to open the door. The Doctor felt the shock of it almost in slow motion. He reached out towards her, but she was already out the door and storming through the rain. It was then that he realized the emptiness of his chest was nothing compared to the emptiness of his hand. He had already lost so much, but in focusing on that, he was losing everything that kept him alive.

He scrambled from the car, calling out her name. Rose kept walking, refusing to turn back or even glance his way. The Doctor hurried forward, driven by a sudden fire in his heart. It was the kind of energy and motivation he had been missing since coming back from Bad Wolf Bay. It was that drive which he needed most. He caught her arm, though she ripped away angrily. Still, she at least turned to face him, although she packed a hard slap along with it.

"Look, I tried, I honestly tried. I thought I could give you time, be the help you needed, but you're so... you're so selfish, wrapped up in your own pain. You can't see that you're just hurting others," her voice was tight, her body trembling with suppressed emotion, fighting it's way out.

"Yes," he said. "I have been selfish, inconsiderate, and I took advantage of you. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. You have to know, I've never meant to hurt you."

A small sob forced its way from her throat, a lost and pitiful sound. The Doctor found tears of his own were pouring down his cheeks as well. He reached out, cradling her head in his hands. She didn't pull away, just stared down at the ground, sniffling softly as her hair fell to hid her face from his view.

"Rose, look at me," he asked, quietly, tenderly. "Please."

Rose raised her head slowly, sobbing a little more as soon as their eyes met. He tried to brush away her tears with his thumbs, but they were replaced with rain and more tears immediately after. Her sweet brown eyes, so full of pain, looked deep into him, and he knew he could never hide anything from her.

"I love you," the Doctor said. "I love you, and I don't want to lose you. I've been a stupid ape, more than any human ever was, but I'm asking you to forgive me. Give me one more chance, and I promise, you'll never regret it. Let me hold your hand, let me hold you close, and I'll get through this. If you're with me I'll get through anything." He paused, waiting for a response, but not getting one. "Do you believe me?"

She nodded silently, before burying her head in his shoulder. His arms snaked around her, pulling her in close. He rocked her softly, needing the feel of her against him just as much as she did. Her shaking gradually stopped but her arms did not loosen around him, and the Doctor was amazed at how safe that made him feel.

"Hold on, Rose." he whispered in her ear. "Hold on and never let me go."

Rose nodded, looking up at him, her eyes filled with pain, but also love and forgiveness. "Never," she promised. " I'm not going to lose you again."

Her head dropped back down, and the Doctor kissed the top of her head. They stood in the rain, just the two of them, until they were chilled to the bone. And when they left, they left the loneliness behind.


	38. Chapter 38: Home

DISCLAIMER: CAN I TELL YOU A SECRET? I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO!

**A/N **_** The song today is **_**Home, **_**again by **_**Michael Bubl****é****. **_**I just finished watching 42 today. I'm not really sure why I haven't watched it before. It was great though. I loved it!(Well I loved it minus Martha.) Anyway, I try and find what I call "Rose Moments"in episodes.(Like the line from Runaway Bride that I used in chapter 35.) Anyway, I didn't find any blatant ones in this particular episode so I decided I'd make one. Thus the chapter was born. I don't actually give really any explanation in the story, and I don't really have one, so you'll have to live with it, I guess. I can't get to reviews tonight, so I'll try to answer all of them tomorrow afternoon if I can. Thanks you guys, you're great!  
**_

**Home**

The Doctor crawled along the floor, still trying to fight against the fire burning in his head. He was fighting a lost battle, he knew, but the least he could do was slow himself in an effort to protect Martha. He forced his body to a stop, but the next second, the sun creature flared up, pushing his body forward again. Crying out in agony, his body spasmed in a physical manifestation of the struggle within.

"Burn with me," he rasped against his will.

Tears forced their way out of his eyes screwed tightly shut. His fists clenched, and another spasm rocked his body.

"No!" he screamed, crawling backwards, only to be stopped but a fiery pain shooting through his spine.

The Doctor felt his body move forward, but he was powerless to stop it. His lips moved in the familiar motions, spouting out the hateful words. Sweat poured down his skin, and his insides burned with liquid flames. This, this was agony. He gave one hard shove backward before crumbling again. He fought against the inevitable commands of the sun creature, but it was no use. He couldn't control it at all anymore. He hoped Martha had gotten to the front. He hoped his life had been given for something good. Most of all, he hoped that when he died, the world beyond would be kind to him. He was on the tipping point, nearly giving in completely to the creature when he heard a soft, sweet voice calling out his name.

"Doctor," Rose murmured on the edge of his consciousness.

He wanted to scream, tell her to run away and save herself from the monster he had become, but all he could manage was another cry of pain. He tried again, this time managing only her name, whispered barely louder than a raindrop. Still, her name felt good, one tiny breeze in the raging torrent of heat. It almost felt as good as the cool fingers, brushing against his heat-radiating forehead.

"Oh, my Doctor,"she whispered. "What have they done to you."

"Rose," his voice was dry and cracky and it was soon taken over by another, loud angry voice. "Burn with me!"

"No," her voice was firm, fearful, yes, but firm just the same. "Leave him alone. I love him, and you can't have him."

The Doctor arched his back, flaming pain flooding his body. He had to warn her; he had to save her.

"Rose, no. You have to leave, don't let it-" A horrible, heart breaking yell ripped through his throat, cutting off his words. The urge to open his eyes, to let the burning fill her up was so strong, so devastatingly strong. The sun creature was yearning to destroy her, but the Doctor kept his eyes resolutely shut. He could control little else, but he would not let it take her away from him, not his Rose.

"Listen to me," Rose said. "I came here to help you. You have to trust me."

The Doctor could only manage a fearful whimper in return.

"Martha's nearly there, the burning is going to leave, but you have to force it. It won't go on it's own. You have to help it. I know it's hard, but you've got to."

He shook his head, clawing the floor to stop himself from doing anything that could possible hurt her. He couldn't... he couldn't hurt her.

"Doctor, do you remember Woman Wept? How cold it was?" she asked, trying to keep his mind away from the sweltering heat. "You had to wear a proper coat for the first time, and I made you wear that ridiculous old scarf. We had a snowball fight, and you were sopping wet by the end. Do you remember that?"

"I remember... I remember," he whispered, the suns' influence was draining, he could feel it being pushed farther and farther back. But was it enough. It was starting to leave, but that was almost as painful as it coming in the first place. He pushed up on his hands, screaming again as he tried hard to push it from his head.

"We were so cold, that when we went home, it was too warm, so we went swimming in the ice cold pool."

He caught on to a single word in the sentence, though he doubted it was the one, Rose intended. Oddly enough, it was not the memory of cold, that ultimately drove the sun creature out, but something else entirely. The moment she said the word, home, he felt something so deep, so instinctive, so powerful it overtook everything. Not even the sun creature could control the love that swept through him. Home. Rose was his home. He had to go home.

The Doctor fell to his back, feeling his head clear as the sun creature finally left. He drew in one, deep, shuddering breath, barely comprehending the state his mind was in. He was so lost, so broken inside, but it didn't matter because Rose was there; he was home.

"Rose," he moaned softly.

Her face appeared in his view, as she leaned over him. He sighed in relief to see her tear-stained face smiling down at him. He reached out a hand to touch her face. She kissed his palm, smiling serenely. But he noted with sadness, her serenity was marred by loneliness and grief. She wasn't going to stay. From around her neck she drew the old Tardis key which she pressed into his hand.

"Give this to Martha as my thank you," Rose said.

The Doctor looked at the key, feeling tears return. "But Rose..."

"I can't stay, not today," Rose explained mournfully.

"Someday?" he asked.

She nodded, smiling the tiniest bit. He grinned in return, knowing that would be enough. She leaned down, kissing him tenderly, which he returned with equal tenderness. She pulled away, standing to go.

"Come home soon" the Doctor said, and Rose nodded before she disappeared in the blink of an eye.


	39. Chapter 39: I'll be Okay

DISCLAIMER: MAYBE IN 20 YEARS I'LL OWN DOCTOR WHO. AS FOR NOW, STILL NOT MINE.

**A/N **_**I'm really sorry this took so long. I've had a million things to do. On the bright side this one is **_**really **_**long**__**. Anyway, **__**it**__**s **_**I'll be Okay**_** by **_**M****cfly****. **_**It turned out so, so different than I planned. I really haven't a clue where it came from. It's kind of random and weird. It's a little bit based off of the minisode, Time Crash. Yeah... it's kind of out there. I don't know if I like it yet, but I'm warming to it. What's the verdict for you? **_

**I'll be Okay**

"No, no, no," The Doctor muttered as he hurried around the console. Everything apparently decided today was the day to go wrong, as he now had universe-threatening problems on his hands. The cloister bell rang loudly, and he sincerely hoped Rose wouldn't wake. He winced at the thought of an unhappy Rose woken at three in the morning. He could do without the inevitable yelling and slapping, thank you.

The Tardis lurched beneath his feet, throwing the Doctor to the floor. "Settle down," he called irritably. "If you wake up Rose, I'll... well I'll think of something."

"Good luck with that," a merry voice popped up from the captain's chair. "I've never been able to come up with something."

The Doctor leaped to his feet, staring open-mouthed at the floppy haired stranger before him. How in the world did that man get on the Tardis, _his_ Tardis. And perhaps more importantly, why was he wearing a bow-tie?

"Who are you?" the Doctor demanded, to which the other fellow laughed.

"Oh come on then," he said. "This isn't the first time this sort of thing has happened. Use your head, Doctor. Who am I?"

The Doctor narrowed his eyes as he circled the strange man. The Tardis continued to rock incessantly, and the wires were beginning to spark. However, his attention remained wholly focused on the man. How on Earth... Suddenly he jumped back, completely shocked. The only way the other man could be on the Tardis was if he had been on a different Tardis which had somehow slipped through time-streams to smash into his own. Which meant only one thing. Well, strictly speaking it could be several things, but the Doctor had seen those suspenders before and the boots come to think of it. Yes, there was no doubt of the stranger's identity.

"You're me," the Doctor said.

"Oh very good, and you haven't even crashed into Five yet," the other Doctor said with a grin. "That's awfully clever of you—us."

"Five?" the Doctor questioned.

"Not to worry, you'll run into him soon enough I suppose. I'm the Eleventh by the way, so naturally you're the tenth. May I call you Ten? Is that quite all right?"

"Are you mad?" Ten asked, with a quirked eyebrow. "May I call you ten? Is that really necessary?"

"So many questions," Eleven remarked, "I haven't the time to answer them I'm afraid. I've got a Tardis to fix you see."

"You mean, _I've_ got a Tardis to fix," Ten said sternly. "You're not touching her."

"Why ever not? She's my ship too, and for the record she likes me better."

"She can't like you better, you're me!"

Eleven sniffed and flipped around. "It's of no consequence. She likes me better, and rarely crashes."

"Oh yes, she _rarely_ crashes," another voice added.

Ten turned to see a leggy red head swagger into the console room, her hips swinging and her face swimming in sarcasm.

"Amy Pond,"she said, matching his gaze. "And you are?"

"The Doctor," he replied quickly, before Eleven could say anything.

"Doctor?" Amy asked, turning to Eleven for confirmation.

"He is right... strictly speaking," Eleven said grudgingly. "That doesn't mean he's going to fix the Tardis though. I've got it under control."

Before the words were all the way out of his mouth, the Tardis shook violently to the side. Ten smiled smugly, and resumed working on his side of the console. Amy sauntered to Eleven's side, seemingly unaware of the danger they were currently in. The way she tossed her hair, and eyed Eleven, told Ten she had other things on her mind. Things which slightly worried him. He wasn't sure the other Doctor had any clue what he had on his hands.

"Doctor!"

Both he and Eleven paled at the angry voice drawing closer. Eleven's lack of color was accompanied by a expression of complete sadness, whereas Ten was sure his showed complete fear. The Tardis had indeed woken Rose up, and now they would both have to deal with the consequences. And Amy... she might be in for quite a shock.

Rose marched in, looking for all the world like the Oncoming Storm, with her blonde hair flying back and her brown eyes flashing dangerously. One glance at Amy, sent her expression up two notches in anger. Amy had a similar reaction.

"Who is she?" Amy snapped, stepping closer to Eleven.

"Rose," he all but whispered, causing all of them to start with surprise, Rose most of all.

She paused in her stewing fury to regard him curiously. Ten watched the silent exchange intently, wondering if she could possibly sense that Eleven was in all actuality the Doctor, or at least one of them. The minute her face softened into a smile he knew she had.

"Doctor," she said.

Eleven nodded, dumbfounded. "Yeah."

"I thought so," she said simply. Her gaze shifted to Amy, narrowing slightly, but she remained silent until her eyes caught Ten's. "What do you think you're doing!"

Ten inwardly cringed, but he maintained his air of superiority. "Don't go jumping to conclusions, Rose. It's hardly my fault."

"Yeah, and why exactly do I have a hard time believing that? Oh yeah that's right, because it's always your fault.,"she retorted. "Now please explain in simple human terms why the Tardis is throwing a fit."

Eleven apparently decided to be helpful and tried to offer a proper explanation. Ten laughed as he proceeded to give a very complex and detailed lecture on crossed time-lines and multiple Tardises by the end he was breathless and frustrated and Rose was gigling and no more educated than before.

"Doctor?" she asked through her laughs as she turned to Ten.

He then gave a slightly less complex and detailed lecture, though Rose still rolled her eyes. He could only humanize it so much after all.

"Yours too, huh?" Amy asked, though her guard was still up.

"Of course," Rose said. "I think it's an inescapable trait. The last one wasn't much better."

"I thought I did quite well," Ten huffed.

Rose smiled. "You did very well."

Another side thrust of the Tardis and they all found themselves in a tangle on the floor. Ten reached out for Rose, planning to pull her up as usual, only to find Eleven had beat him to it. The little rat.

"Are you going to fix that?" Amy asked, idly.

"It's not that easy," Ten complained.

"Oh, it's very simple in fact, I could do it in a heartbeat," Eleven countered.

"Right, then get to it," Rose said, settling into the chair. "I'm not staying up all night."

"Morning, actually," Eleven corrected.

Ten smiled sourly and began twisting buttons on the console. Brilliant, 'leven just brilliant. Pop back in the past without Rose and proceed to flirt with _his_ Rose. No, no, no he couldn't stand by and let that happen. A sharp snap of a lever, sent them all careening again. But this time, it was planned and executed with exactness so that Rose ended up falling on his chest. Fantastic.

"Morning, Rose."He grinned. "Beautiful day, isn't?"

"You did that on purpose," she accused. "You're jealous."

"I can hardly be jealous of myself, now can I?" he said, immensely pleased that she hadn't yet moved. He could feel Amy and Eleven's eyes burning on them.

"I think you are though," Rose said, smiling with her tongue poking out. "You're afraid I'm going to run away with your dashing, much younger counterpart."

"He's not that much younger," Ten protested.

"Well," Eleven started.

"Shut up," Rose and Ten said at the same time.

Eleven was gob smacked, and Amy was clearly pleased. Ten wasn't the only one suffering from jealousy.

"You going to get off anytime, soon?" Ten asked, though he dearly hoped she wouldn't.

"You'll just flip the lever again," she said. "Prevention is the best way to go, you know."

"I agree," Amy said quickly, slipping her arm through Eleven's. "You two work on prevention and we'll go fix the Tardis."

"That's not such a good idea," Ten said, scrambling to his feet. "You and Rose go do something... companionly and the Doctor and I will fix the Tardis."

"Companionly isn't a word," Rose teased. "Surely a great Time-lord like you knows that."

"Rose, I know English," he assured her, and pushed her gently to the side. "Now let us work please."

"Tea would be lovely, Rose," Eleven piped up suddenly. He grinned sheepishly when she threw him a strange look. "It's been awhile since I've had your tea."

Rose lit up like a Christmas bulb, and smiled. "It's not like mine is that great."

Ten didn't especially like her shy modesty, but at this point it would be better if she were off making tea instead of distracting them both. "Go on, we'll have this thing fixed when it's ready."

"I'm not so sure about that," she answered as she left.

Amy seemed incredibly relieved when Rose was gone. She sat in the chair to observe their work, her brow slightly furrowed.

"Did... that is do..." she stumbled in formulating her question.

"Spit it out, Pond," Eleven said without sparing a glance.

"Just what sort of companion was she—is she?"

Ten and Eleven glanced across the way at one another before bursting into laughter. Amy shifted uncomfortably, her face beat red. They only laughed harder.

"She's just to keep us from going insane, like you," Eleven answered when his breath returned.

"Then why are you both... I don't know, so gaga over her?" Amy asked sullenly.

They laughed again.

"I don't think gaga's quite the word," Eleven said.

"Oh yes it is," she said. "You're both falling over yourself to impress her, like she's the Queen of England or something."

"I've met her," they said in unison.

"She's not worth falling over," Ten commented.

"Who? Rose or the Queen."

"Oh the Queen, definitely," Eleven said. "Mind you, it depends on which one."

"And Rose is worth falling over?" Amy asked.

The Doctors squirmed under her steady gaze, both reluctant to speak.

"Sure," Eleven finally piped up. "I mean most of my companions are."

Ten whacked Eleven upside the head, glaring at him. "Go fiddle with some levers or something."

"I didn't mean it like that," Eleven said, shrugging. "They're worth it for other people I meant. People... not me—us."

Amy narrowed her eyes. "But Rose is worth it for the two of you. Why?"

"Oh, there is nothing here, Pond," Eleven said. "Leave it be."

"He's got a point," Ten said, as he ducked under the grating. "There's is absolutely nothing of interest in this conversation."

"Completely pointless to pursue," Eleven added for good measure.

Amy clearly didn't buy it.

"Maybe I should just ask Rose I bet she could tell me."

"I bet she wouldn't," Eleven replied and Ten let it stand at that.

"Why not?" Amy asked, leaning forward. "A girl is always dying to spill."

"Not this one," Ten said. "You won't get a word out of her."

"Not with the secret she's carrying," Eleven added absentmindedly.

Ten hurled a wrench, satisfied when it connected with Eleven's head. Amy's eyebrows rose a mile high.

"What secret?" Amy inquired, completely attentive. "She's not pregnant is she?"

"No," they both snapped immediately.

"That's absurd," Ten said, though his cheeks were pink."Practically impossible,"

"Highly unlikely," Eleven agreed.

"But it is possible... that's good to know, I guess. Is the baby going to be time-lord or human?"

"Half," Eleven replied confidently. "A single heart, but with regeneration."

Ten gaped at him in shock. "What?"

Eleven gazed at him without understanding, though is eyes widened soon enough. "No, no. She's not—you're not. _If_ it were to happen, the baby would be half. That's all I meant. Sweet Rassilon, I swear."

"That better be all you meant," Ten said after a moment. "It's one thing that she's not with you anymore. It's another thing if she _and_ her baby aren't with you."

"So..." Amy said slowly. "You were so genuinely shocked, but you wouldn't have been if there really was nothing here. You would have dismissed it immediately as ridiculous, but instead you worried. Something is going on."

"She's observant," Eleven said.

Ten threw another wrench. "Idiot."

"You do realize you have to tell me now, don't you?" she said smugly. "I've got your coffin all but nailed."

Ten and Eleven looked at each other for a full minute straight. Eleven shrugged, his expression showing pain and Ten only grimaced.

"We're married," Ten said. Even the Tardis fell silent at that.

Amy stared, completely frozen. "What?" she asked.

"You heard him," Eleven said, flicking a series of switches in record time. "We're married. Well technically he's the one married."

"And don't you forget it," Ten said with a frosty look, though just beneath it was warm and teasing.

"You're married?" Amy asked, still shocked. "And you never mentioned it, not once."

"You never asked," he said with a shrug.

"Oh, well I think kissing you would normally be constituted as a question." she said.

"You kissed him?"Ten asked, wrinkling his nose. "Why would you ever kiss a mop like him?"

"Why not?" Eleven joked. "I imagine I'm quite handsome. I don't really know though."

"You're married." She seemed a little more sure now.

"Yes," Eleven snipped. "I've been married at least a dozen times if you must know. Now, I suggest you go do something useful and let me finish saving the universe."

"Done," Ten said with a very self-satisfied smirk.

Eleven's jaw dropped and he ran to the console. Sure enough, the readings were steadying and the Tardis was slowly quieting down.

"Of all the things in the world..." he said. "I thought for sure I would need to use the black hole-supernova trick."

"Were you planning on marrying me?" Amy asked.

"For Rassilon's sake," Eleven cried, throwing up his hands. "Why don't you drop this? No, I was not planning to marry you. Yes, Rose and I were married once upon a time. Why? Because I fell in love with her. Why isn't she with me now? Because I lost her. Does that answer all of your questions?"

Amy was stunned into silence, and Ten didn't blame her. He too was blown away by the sudden outburst which clearly revealed the deep pain Eleven held. That scared him more than anything. As it was, he could happily go through each day, pretending Rose would stay with him forever. To hear the truth and see the pain in his own someday self... it reminded him of all the reasons he had originally hesitated.

"You still lover her," Amy whispered. "After all this time."

"When you live this long, it hasn't been all that long ago," Eleven murmured. "I regenerated, but I still remember every moment, still feel every regret."

A quiet bell rang throughout the Tardis and they all glanced around curiously.

"It's almost time for you to go," Ten said, and oddly that saddened him.

Eleven nodded, his shoulders drooping now that the crisis was over. Ten felt exactly the way he looked.

"I suppose you can't tell me what happens," Ten said softly.

Eleven laughed quietly. "Nah. It might change anyway. Time is in flux, that sort of idea."

"Right. Any advice?" Ten asked.

"Don't lose her," he answered wistfully. "Don't ever let her go."

Ten's eyes slid to view Amy, shuffling awkwardly on the side. No doubt, she thought she had just stumbled into the most uncomfortable situation possible. Who wants to hear two people discussing their true love who happens to not be you?

Next his eyes landed on Rose, who was just walking in, a tray balanced expertly on her pajama clad hips. She had no idea what kind of impact she had. Three regenerations completely devoted to her, six hearts beating for just one, and probably more to come. How could he ever lose her? His chest ached at the very thought. He didn't envy Eleven at all.

"Sorry to have troubled you," Eleven said. "Amy and I will be leaving, I'm afraid."

"So soon," she said.

"The Tardises are stable, the universe is safe," he explained. "We can't stay. It's not even a choice. The Tardises will separate all on their own in just a few minutes."

"It was nice to meet you," she offered. "Truly it was."

Ten wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her to his side as an assurance that he wasn't going to lose her. Not yet anyway. She settled perfectly into his body, gazing with sad eyes at Eleven and Amy. Eleven gazed sadly back, and Amy pressed a sympathetic hand to his shoulder.

"Good luck with everything," Amy said somewhat weakly.

"Same to you," Ten nodded. "Don't let the old fellow wear you out."

"Huh, as if," Eleven grumbled. "If anything, she'll wear me out."

"Well it's about time then," Rose said teasingly, though tears clung to her lashes. "Someone needs to serve you up some of your own medicine."

"Goodbye," Eleven said, suddenly very serious. "If we're lucky perhaps it won't be goodbye forever."

"I hope not," Rose replied softly.

A quiet whirring sound filled the air, and a white light flashed briefly. Eleven and Amy disappeared leaving Ten and Rose all alone in the console room.

"How do you think it happens?" Rose whispered fearfully.

"Who knows," the Doctor answered quietly. "But I promise you I'll do everything to make sure it never does."

"Is it possible?" Rose asked, looking to his face.

"Time can be rewritten, Rose," he said, running a tired hand through his hair. "I'm determined to see that it is."

* * *

The Doctor woke suddenly, blinking quickly. The dream was so vivid in his mind, so real in every little detail. If not for the warm body tucked in his arms he might think it was real. He glanced down at Rose, twining her hair round his fingers. He hadn't lost her. The dream was only a dream. She was safe beside him and not going anywhere. His arms tightened around her though, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he hadn't held her for ages. She stirred, her lids lifting just enough to see blearily.

"Go back to sleep, Rose," He murmured into her hair.

"Luka... is he fine?" Rose asked slowly.

"Luka is safe," the Doctor answered, smiling to think of his little boy bundled in the crib in the corner. "Don't worry."

She nodded contently, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. "And you? Did you have a nightmare?"

"You could say that I guess," he answered hesitantly. "I think I saw a time-line. A dead time-line."

She chuckled. "I'm to tired for complicated time-lord science."

"I saw a possibility that was averted," the Doctor said thoughtfully. "I wonder what changed."

"You're all right though?" Rose asked worriedly.

"You're here," he said, smiling sweetly. "I'll be okay."


	40. Chapter 40: I'm Coming to Get You

DISCLAIMER: IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL, BUT I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.**  
**

**A/N **_**Today is **_**I'm coming to Get You**_** by **_**Murray Gold. **_**Kind of an odd title, which made for an interesting day. I ended up doing something very different than what I thought at the start. Personally, I like this much better than the last one, but I still feel a bit rusty. I'm going to try and start doing everyday again, so that should hopefully get the juices flowing.  
**_

**I'm Coming to Get You  
**

Rose sat forlornly on the cold metal bench outside her dance studio, watching the people walk briskly past without sparing her a second glance. She pulled her puffy purple coat tighter around her, hoping her mum would get there before it started to rain. Secretly, she wondered if her mum was going to come at all. To her seven-year-old mind, it felt like hours and hours since her lessons had gotten out. A single raindrop fell on the tip of her nose, and she finally released the flood gates. She cried sloppily into her sleeve, blubbering and sobbing until a warm hand patted her hair. It wasn't her mum's hand though, it belonged to a man.

Rose slowly lifted her head to look at the strange man sitting next to her. He had curly brown hair hiding beneath an overgrown hat, and kind eyes that almost seemed to laugh aloud. He wore a large overcoat and perhaps the silliest (and longest) scarf she had ever seen. All in all, he was perhaps the strangest, most wonderful man she had ever met.

"Now what's a pretty little girl like you crying for?" he asked, his voice open and caring. Even if Rose hadn't trusted him before, she certainly would have at the sound of his voice.

"Mum forgot me," she whimpered. "And I think I''m going to freeze to death in the rain."

The man looked up at the cloudy, but rainless sky, a wry smile on his face. "I think you and I would get along famously, my little friend."

"My name is Rose Tyler, and I don't care if we would get along," she said. "I just want to go home."

"Well that's a problem easy enough to remedy," he said. "Where did you live, Miss Rose Tyler?"

"The Powell Estate," Rose told him, and pointed in the general direction. "That's over there."

"The Powell Estate, huh?" He considered her, the tears drying on her face and the runny nose. He nodded, and held out his hand. "I think, I can manage that."

Rose grasped his large hand, loving how it completely enveloped her fingers. His hand was warm and surprisingly soft. She liked it. It was hand that felt comfortable, ready to be held at any time. Despite the differences in size, her hand felt good in his. She swung their hands a little bit, confirming all that she had already thought. His was a hand worth holding.

* * *

Rose boarded the bus, hiding her tear-stained face from the driver. The light suitcase wasn't too hard to settle next to her and it discouraged others from sitting beside her. The plan was working brilliantly up until the very outskirts of the London suburbs.

"May I sit here?"

Rose looked up quickly into a pair of ancient eyes set in a young face. She shook her head, scolding herself for such dramatic thoughts. People didn't have 'ancient eyes'. Except him, a part of her insisted. This man, strange and beautiful, definitely had ancient eyes. Beautiful. He really was beautiful even with the ugly bow tie and tweed jacket.

"I guess," she said hesitantly, shifting her bag.

"Thanks," he said.

They sat quietly as the bus trundled along. Rose stared out the window, sneaking a glance of the man now and again. It probably should have scared her that he was always looking at her, but it didn't. It... it made her feel warm and pretty.

"Where are you headed?" He asked.

She shrugged. "Anywhere. I don't really care."

He watched for a minute, his brow knit. "You're running away?"

"Better than staying," Rose muttered.

"I doubt that," he said.

"What do you know anyway?" she asked.

"I know your mum will be worried," he replied. "She really does love you."

"How can you even know that?" Rose said. "You don't know me or her."

"Rose Tyler, I'm telling you to go home," he said sternly.

Rose's mouth dropped and she stared at him in shock. Again, she probably should have been worried but she found it wasn't at all disconcerting to hear him say her name.

"You're twelve years old; you should be going to school and being brilliant," he said.

"I'm not brilliant," Rose said.

"Oh yes you are."

The bus jerked to a stop, and the man stood abruptly. He gazed down at her, his eyes completely focused on her face. She was awed by his intensity, the power in the way he held himself. When he reached for her hand, she didn't resist at all. He pulled from her seat and they walked together off the bus.

"The bus home will be here in five minutes," he said. "Don't dawdle."

"I won't," she promised.

"That's my girl."

* * *

Rose zipped up her jacket, glancing quickly at her watch. She was going to be very late if she didn't hurry. She glanced at the corner before her, hesitant. If she turned right like always she could skirt around one of the trashier neighborhoods. But if she went straight, she might just get home in time. It was still too early for most of the creeps to be out an about, she rationalized as she kept going.

Half-way through the neighborhood a guy in a black leather duster stepped into the street. Rose, straightened her back, determined to keep walking. She heard once that the more confident you looked the less likely you were to be bothered. She prayed she looked confident now. When two more guys filtered in, she began to get worried.

" Hey," the duster guy said, as she approached. "It's Jimmy's girl."

Rose ignored him, but it was difficult to ignore the pounding in her chest. Jimmy... so this was one of Jimmy's friends. That didn't bode well at all, when she remembered the old crowd. They had been bad enough then. A year could only have made them braver, more desperate for drugs, girls, and anything else they could get their hands on. A chill ran up her back. She wasn't going to get out of this one.

"Jimmy's _old_ girl," one of the others said. "She's free game now."

"And she's scared," the third one said with a grin. "Don't you remember us Rosie?

"Leave her alone."

Rose flipped around to see a grandfatherly man come down the street, leaning on a walking stick. His white hair and cape blew black in the October wind and she could easily imagine a flash of lightning perpetually following him. Old as he was, there was something very striking in his manner. She instantly felt safe.

"What are you going to do?" Duster asked snidely.

Moving faster than Rose could blink, the old man cracked his cane across Duster's face in answer. He stumbled back, clutching his nose as blood began flowing. The man smiled proudly at his work, smacking the other two when they approached. Within minutes, the three had disappeared with a collection of both bruises and curses.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

Rose nodded, but tears began streaming down her cheeks. Next thing she knew, she was collapsing into the man's steady arms as she cried into his shoulder. He patted her back gently, and stroked her hair, with weathered hands until her tears stopped. She pulled back, looking into his eyes.

"Thank you," she said, shakily.

"You shouldn't be here," he said. "Their kind comes here often, I think."

"Yes." She nodded. "I should have known better."

"You'll remember for next time I hope?" Rose had the distinct feeling he was reprimanding her.

"I need to get home," she said.

He offered his arm and a soft smile.

"Allow me to escort you," he said.

She smiled and took his arm. This strange man, so kind but distinctly powerful gave her a good feeling. Like she was safe, but also loved and wanted. She trusted him to take them safely to the Powell Estate.

* * *

Standing, surrounded by Daleks, Rose's pulse was ten times too fast. The blood pounded in her ears, and her breathing was anything but regular. Her hands shook with fear, and it was all she could do to stay standing. On the projected screen her Doctor stared right at her. The fire in his clear blue eyes, reassured her as nothing else could. She was staring death in the face, but it didn't matter because the Doctor was there. He would take care of her, just as he always did.

It was then in that moment, when he firmly declared no, that she realized just how long he had been taking care of her. Rose could count dozens and dozens of times that she had been helped protected and loved by a mysterious man who usually left just a soon as he had come. Now she knew, no matter the face or the situation, that man had always been the Doctor. Each and every time, she needed him he had been there.

"Rose?" he asked, a tiny smile just to say her name.

"Yes, Doctor?" she replied, feeling strength flood into her.

"I'm coming to get you."


	41. Chapter 41: I Can Only Imagine

DISCLAIMER: I MOST CERTAINLY DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**I**__**t's kind of late so I'll answer reviews**__** tomorrow. The song is **_**I Can Only Imagine **_**by **_**M****ercyme **_**which **__**is sort of out of alphabetical order, but I guess the apostrophe in the previous two chapters comes first. Anyway, I really, really like this one. It's 9**__**th**__** doctor perspective and it's written in present tense, which is unusual for me. It's also kind of short, but I think that if it were longer it would actually take away from the story. It's one of my personal favorites. I hope you all like it. And I wouldn't be surprised if there'**__**s quite a few mistakes in it. However, as I said, it's a little late and I seriously need to get some sleep.**_

**I Can Only Imagine**

The Doctor settles back on his pillows, considering the blank wall before him. His hearts are beating unusually fast and there's a feeling of warmth spreading into his stone cold soul. Rose Tyler. He met Rose Tyler today and what a day it was. She was so brave but so unsure. She's going to be one of the best. He knows it beyond a shadow of a doubt. She's got the kindness and the love that all the best companions need. Something tells him it's beyond that though. She's not just going to be a wonderful companion... she'll be more. It's dangerous, he knows, but he can't stop himself from examining the possible futures. The doors in his head that always stay tightly closed are rattling in their locks, begging for use. And for once, he doesn't fight them. He throws them open, soaking in the glory of time.

He's walking through the color rich fields on Athena's seventh moon. Rose is beside him, her hand interlocked with his, a awe filled smile lighting her face. A few years down the road, he thinks she's ready. On their favorite hill in the universe, he kneels before her, tears in his eyes as he asks her to marry him. Jackie fusses that she's still too young, but when she sees the joy in both of their faces she can't refuse.

A flash of light and the time lines shift. Now Rose walks through a garden of crystalline flowers with a younger man. His messy hair and converses are unfamiliar, but the Doctor know it's still him. They're brimming with smiles, still hand in hand. Under a starlit sky, they share a first kiss. It's tender and short, full of uncertainty and fed by a love to span the ages. They lose their first child despite all the Doctor does to save her. Sadness tears their hearts but they have each other to cling to. And when a golden eyed, brown haired baby girl is born, their happiness is sweeter for their pain.

Rose is alone for now, her tears falling silently as she stands in an unpainted nursery. Her hands are clasped over her swollen belly. Jackie enters the room, wrapping her arms around Rose and they both cry together. His hearts jump in agony. Where is he?

"I'm sorry," Jackie whispers.

"He promised," Rose says. "He promised this was the last time he would leave until the baby came. Jack said... Jack said he died saving the world one last time."

"He died saving you,"Jackie answered. "Both of you."

The Doctor is relieved when the next time line is presented. He doesn't think he could take more of that scene. This time it's he and Rose again, shooting down a chute, landing in a tangle. They freeze, their eyes locked. He pushes hair from her face, trailing his hand down her cheek. Her eyes close in response and he can't resist kissing her forehead. A haphazard, dark haired man flies down the chute, ruining the moment. At the end of the day though, when they're alone together in the kitchen, they share a secret smile filled with new meaning. It won't be long before their single moment in a lifetime of adventure turns to a lifetime of each other and moments of adventure.

Another shift, but the Doctor kills it before the feeling of unease accompanying it can grow. He's seen enough to know a life without Rose is hardly one worth living.

The last one he sees features the younger, messier version of himself. Except he's only got one heart... he doesn't take the time to look back over the time stream to see how that anomaly occurred. Instead he watches as he and Rose head a team of special agents. Defending the Earth, together. They fight every moment with their hands clasped tightly, too scared to let go. And he thinks... he thinks they've known what its like to be apart and never wish to be that way again. Their life is long, happy and full. Their children are strong and brave. Just like their parents.

The Doctor softly shuts the door, locking it securely once more. He saw things that scare him to death but he also saw things of beauty and love. He settles into bed, smiling as he falls to sleep. No matter what path their lives take, whether it's short or long, he knows that together, they'll be fantastic.


	42. Chapter 42: I Could Not Ask For More

DISCLAIMER: DO YOU SEE AND THE DOCTOR AND ROSE FOREVER? THEN NO, I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Our song today is **_**I Could Not Ask For More **_**by **_**Sara Evans. **_**This one is a gift to my very good friend. I dedicated one for her before with the Meta-crisis but this one is specifically requested by her. I don't think I followed the rules exactly that she gave me, but it's what she gets. I don't really remember why I'm writing this, I made a deal, but I don't know what I got out of it. :-) Oh well I guess. Anyway, I like this one pretty well... not much else to say I suppose. Happy Reading!**_

**I C****ould not ask for More**

The Doctor swiped his card as he came into Torchwood Headquarters, nodding to the guards as he passed through. His steps were lively and quick, anxious to see Rose after a week apart. Most of the time, they were placed on the same field units, but ever since her pregnancy was confirmed he'd been going alone. Now that he had returned home, he wanted nothing more than to kiss her senseless. A few of the agents passing through the halls nodded respectively a few greeted him, but he didn't stop to talk with any. The closer he got to her office, the faster he walked, and the wider his smile grew. Just as he reached the correct floor, Pete caught sight of him.

"She's not in," Pete called, stopping upon seeing him.

"What?" the Doctor asked, his mood falling a mile.

"She got called for field work just this morning," Pete said.

"No," he said, horrified. "She could be hurt."

"I'm sure she's fine," Pete replied. "It's the Loners again. They asked for her specifically. We figured her previous experience and their friendly nature would minimize the danger."

"Minimize it? Oh that's just great," the Doctor said. "She's not supposed to be in danger at all. She's pregnant!"

"And so are several of our other agents," Pete pointed out. "Look we've got three people assigned to insure Rose returns home safely and we're keeping a constant monitor on the baby."

"You better have," The Doctor growled. "If anything happens to them..."

"I know, John," he said. "Do I think I'm not worried too? She's my _daughter_."

The Doctor ignored him, turning sharply back down the corner. Where his steps to Rose's office had been quick, his steps to communications were faster than light. His heart pounded with fear, and he could barely fight off the rising panic. He wouldn't be at peace until Rose was safe in his arms once more.

"Doctor Smith," the Communications Head greeted.

The Doctor nodded, silently surveying the screens before him. So far things looked good, video of Rose's negotiations streamed in and the baby's readings were displayed on another screen. He slipped on the headset, nervously listening to the various units report and the medical personal give unceasing commentary. Everything was under control, but the Doctor didn't trust it. It could all go wrong in a single instant. He could lose everything.

"I want to helicopter in," he demanded, when Pete slid into the chair next to him. "I want to be with her."

"You can't," Pete said, shaking his head. "If you break the negotiations in any way, there's no telling what they'll do."

"I can't just sit here," he replied weakly.

"You have to."

Together they sat. Father and Husband uneasily watching their Rose. The Doctor flinched at every turn of the conversation and Pete shuddered with any new development. When the building shuddered with the subway passing nearby, they nearly jumped out of their seats. But when something truly went wrong neither were prepared.

As the fighting broke out, The Doctor clawed at the screens, screaming, pleading for a helicopter. He watched in horror as all lines of communication faltered. Rose's voice calling out orders cut out and the video went completely black. Even the baby's read outs stopped in the blink of an eye. Beside him, Pete was silent, staring at the screen in utter shock.

"Impossible," he whispered.

"Pete, get me in there," The Doctor begged, half mad with terror. "Get me in there now."

"There's no way... we have to wait."

"There's always a way," the Doctor yelled, tears streaming. "We have to save her. I have to save her."

Driven by sheer panic for Rose's life, he took to flipping all the switches he could reach, trying desperately to restore the link. Finally on of the technicians grasped his arms firmly, pulling him out of the room into the white washed hallway. He sank against the wall, completely overwhelmed.

"Let me go," he moaned. "I have to get to Rose."

"There's nothing we can do," the technician said slowly and clearly. "You've got to calm down, sir."

"No." He shook his head, his face fallen to misery. "She needs me. Can't you see I have to find her?"

"Sir, you're going into shock."

"Time-Lords don't go into shock," The Doctor replied sourly. "But apparently half time lords do. If I were the old me, I could save her right now. The old me would cross universes, fight time itself to save her. But I can't... I can't do anything. I'm useless.

"You've saved her more than times than we've got recorded," he said. "And she's saved you just as many times. She'll be okay."

* * *

The Doctor stood in the biggest window Torchwood had, staring forlornly at the street. Two hours later, and still no Rose. They had long since handcuffed him to prevent another attempt to go after her. Now he simply paced back an forth, praying for her safe return. He even took to making crazy bargains, but he doubted they mattered. All that mattered was Rose and that still empty street.

He settled into a hideous chair, hiding his face in his hands as the tears took over once again. He kept thinking of the baby, that little flicker of life just waiting to come into the world. He could see the bouncy curls and sweet brown eyes just like Rose. Or perhaps it would be a little boy with wild hair, and freckles sprinkled generously across his nose. The thought of never lifting them in his arms, of kissing them goodnight, it killed inside.

Just then, the drone of tires and roar of an engine sounded outside. The Doctor crossed to the window, his heart leaping to his throat at the familiar insignia emblazoned on the jeep. It could be another mission, a completely different team, but the hope inside him would not be stopped. It spread like wild fire through him, coursing right along with the ever present time traces in his veins. His heart was a supernova of anticipation.

The Doctor flew down the stairs, the cuffs barely denting his speed and agility at all. He stopped long enough to have them removed when he ran into Pete on the second floor. Following that, he was off again without a word, his legs flying faster than ever before. He shot out the doors, grinding to halt in tandem with the jeep. He watched restlessly as the door slowly opened. He gripped his hair, letting it go in a flood of relief when Rose stepped out, her face simply glowing.

"Rose!"

He was at her side in seconds, sweeping her into a crushing hug, before meeting her lips in a heated, needy kiss. She kissed him back sweetly, laughing aloud when he pulled away. He hugged her tightly, sobbing in purest release as all the emotions of the day culminated in the strongest outpouring of love.

"I love you," he said quickly, stumbling over his tongue. "I love you, Rose."

"Yes, I know," she replied, touching his cheek. "You've said it twice now."

The Doctor laughed his eyes bright. " That's all I know to say right now. I love you! Don't ask me to say anything else."

"I couldn't ask for more than that," she answered, kissing him again. "And I love you too, you daft alien. _I love you too_."


	43. Chapter 43: I Don't Want to Miss a Thing

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**I was doing so good... and then I went on my unintentional hiatus. I'm terribly sorry. I promise I will do better next week. The song is **_**I Don't Want to Miss a Thing **_**by **_**Aerosmith. **_**I like the basic premise of this, but I'm not super happy with the ending paragraphs. I was trying to hard to tie in the title, so it just became a little awkward to write. Anyway, I hope you like it. By the way, I went to Harry Potter this morning, and it was SOOOOO GOOD! I loved it. Mind, it can't beat the books, but it was brilliant just the same! Oh, sorry it's a bit short. I'll do better next time.  
**_

**I ****Don't Want to Miss a Thing**

The Doctor woke in the middle of the night, his mind still foggy with sleep. He couldn't remember what had thrust him out of the unusual warmth of his dreams. Dimly, he recalled having heard the sound of crying. Straining his ears, he sat perfectly still. After a minute, he picked up quiet sobs from next door.

"Rose," he whispered to himself.

The Doctor stumbled out of bed, haphazardly throwing on a crumpled t-shirt as he went. He paused outside of Rose's door, knocking softly. From inside, he heard a mild choking which sounded vaguely like come in. He pushed open the door to see Rose sitting up, her arms tight around herself.

She glanced at him just long enough for him to see the silver tear streaks on her cheeks before turning her face down again.

The Doctor crossed the room hesitantly, sitting on the bed beside her. He remained silent, not sure how to handle this side of Rose. She leaned closer towards him and he instinctively wrapped his arms around her. Her body conformed to his, her arms fitting snugly on his chest, her face matched perfectly to the crook of his shoulder. He rested his head on hers, rocking her back and forth and murmuring into her hair.

When her tears ran out and turned to sniffles, she stayed locked in his arms, only turning her head, so she wasn't speaking into his shoulder.

"Thank you," she said.

"Anytime," the Doctor promised. "Do... do you want to talk about it?"

Rose mutely shook her head and they left it at that. He held her for few minutes more until her heart was beating in tandem with his. He tilted his head, to look down out her face. Her hair framed her angel face in a golden glow, and her swirled brown eyes blinked ever slowly as sleep approached. Gently, he shifted her farther up the bed, laying her head on the pillow. He hugged her tightly and stood to go. To his surprise, she caught his hand just as he was leaving.

"Stay," she said, her voice too tired to convey the desperation that flashed momentarily in her eyes.

The Doctor regarded her face, so young and vulnerable. Looking into that face, he couldn't help himself from settling back on the bed. He lay down, listening to her soft breath beside him. His arms wound around her and he was again surprised at how natural it all felt. She slipped easily into his side, her head resting comfortably above his left heart. She tilted her head and smiled sweetly at him.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing," she said.

"Liar," the Doctor said, but it sounded more like an endearment than anything else.

Rose just smiled again and rested her head back down. "Goodnight, Doctor."

"Goodnight," he replied.

Rose fell asleep soon after, but the Doctor lingered in the waking world, considering the girl nestled in his arms. He could spend his whole life like this and never care. All the universe, the planets in all their majesty, the stars with their glory, they couldn't hold a candle to Rose. She was filled with majesty and glory simply in the way she treated others, the smiles she freely gave. But for all her goodness, he loved her for her imperfections too. The little things that made her human, that gave her a chance to grow.

The Doctor's life left little room for moments like this. He was also so anxious that he see every detail the universe had to offer, and that his companions would see it too. But with Rose, he was beginning to see what the slow path had to offer. If he didn't take it, he would miss everything that a life with Rose had to offer. Thinking of this as he fell asleep by her side, he chose the slow path for the first time in his life because he _didn't_ want to miss a thing.


	44. Chapter 44: I Keep Looking

DISCLAIMER: A TERRIBLE TRAGEDY THOUGH IT MAY BE, I STILL HAVE NO OWNERSHIP OF THE MOST WONDERFUL SHOW KNOW AS DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N ****I Keep Looking **_**by **_**Sara Evans **_**is the song today. I totally didn't do what I planned with this one. I mean, even more than when I usually say that. It was kind of a random burst of wanting to write the Master I suppose. Oh, it's kind of a sequel to Chapter 34, **_**Haven't Met You Yet, **_**which was also quite a surprise for me. I wasn't expecting that at all. I think though, I might have to periodically visit this storyline. It's quite intriguing. **_

**I ****Keep Looking**

Theta rested back in the rusty grass, shutting his eyes against the sun glaring overhead. The ground shook as Koschei flopped down a few feet away. He turned onto his side, cracking open an eye to see his friend. Koschei was on his stomach, tearing out the grass idly and twining the blades around each other.

"How's the noise?" Theta asked cautiously.

Koschei shrugged. "Better today. I can hardly hear them at all. And your... dreams... are they any better?"

"Same as always," Theta answered. "It keeps slipping away."

"Have you tried writing it down right when you wake up?" he asked.

"It's no good," Theta said. "There's just this feeling of emptiness and the girl..."

"The girl?" Koschei asked. He appeared surprised enough, but there was the slightest hitch in his voice that made Theta think he was hiding something.

"The one I saved on that field-trip, you know the one," Theta said.

"Oh yeah..." There was no hiding the nervous tone now. "...that girl."

"You know something, Koschei," Theta said, rising to sit on his knees. "What aren't you tell me?"

"Nothing," Koschei said immediately, but he squirmed under Theta's hard gaze.

"Don't lie to me. I know you're hiding something."

Theta glared steadily at the other boy, anger and a longing to know battering his hearts. He was often plagued by dreams, usually terrible nightmares of deadly metal creatures and Gallifrey falling into flames, but ever since the field-trip a second dream haunted him on a frequent basis. It started out warm and happy as far as he knew, but it always ended with a beautiful blond girl watching him with soulful brown eyes as she faded away, just out of reach. Without fail, he woke to a gaping hole through both of his hearts and tears staining his cheeks.

"Everyone has secrets," Koschei said weakly.

"Not secrets like this," Theta countered. "You have no idea what it's like. I see her face...it hurts so bad."

"Yeah well so do the drums, but no one will tell what they are either," Koschei said. "Just leave it alone."

"At least... at least tell me her name," Theta said, tears threatening.

He looked pleadingly at Koschei. He caught the sea green eyes rimmed with blue for only a moment before Koschei looked away. He resumed tearing out the grass, keeping his eyes resolutely on his hands. Theta slid onto his stomach, pushing his face closer to Koschei's until their eyes finally met.

"Theta..." He said, clearly on the edge of telling.

"Please," Theta said. "Just her name, that's all I want."

"You can't... you can't go looking for her," Koschei warned. "You made me promise I wouldn't let you look for her."

"I've all ready been looking for her," Theta retorted. "I checked her against the archives, she's not there. I'm still trying to get into the higher archives in case she's there. I even looked for her when we chose to do our project on humans. I will always look for her."

"Theta, no," Koschei said. "You _can't_."

"She's special, you know she is," Theta said. "I just want to know why, is that so bad?

"Yes," Koschei said firmly. "I'll tell you her name, but only if you swear you'll drop it after that. You can't know about her yet. It will disrupt the time-lines rip and all sorts of other nasty things."

"Fine. I won't give up forever, but I will for now," he said.

"Her name is Rose."

A grin spread slowly over Theta's face and he nodded his head. Rose. That was right. Rose was her name. And what a wonderful name it was. To hear it said was pleasant, but to say it aloud, to let it roll off his tongue was a joy.

* * *

The Doctor ran a hand through his hair, glaring at the grey hairs that tangled in his fingers. He wasn't the young boy from the academy anymore, but then neither was the Master. He had regenerated since those days. His hair was brown in the light, black in the shadows, and his eyes... they saddened the Doctor the most. He could see all that had gone wrong in the Master in those eyes. The years of struggling with the drums had turned Koschei into the man he now was.

"Did they send you to kill me?" The Master asked, grinning widely. "I do hope so."

"Why did you stop fighting?" the Doctor asked sadly. "You've always fought it off before."

Something flashed through the Master's eyes, pain perhaps remorse, but it was gone as soon as it had come. He rattled the chains around his wrists, laughing now.

"It got worse," he said simply. "Can you believe that? As bad as it once was it's gotten worse."

The Doctor looked on his old friend with sympathy. He was hardly a shadow of the boy he knew. The Master was overtaken with insanity, laughing in his pain, evil brimming from his grin. Still, the old Master had to be there somewhere and that man might listen.

"The dreams are worse too," the Doctor confided.

Suddenly the Master stopped laughing, his eyes focused with deadly seriousness on the Doctor.

"The nightmares, or Rose?"

"Both," the Doctor answered. "I don't sleep at night anymore cause I get woken up by one or the other. When I do sleep, I'm more likely to get both dreams in the same night."

"You still haven't found her?" the Master asked, and for a change he sounded sad.

"No," he replied. "I keep looking."

"Perhaps she never really existed," the Master said, the madness returning. "First me, then the Rani, and now you. We're all doomed to be driven insane by our childhood. Perhaps we'll join forces and rule the universe together."

"I'll pass," the Doctor said as he turned to go.

"Don't turn your back on me," the Master hissed.

"You turned your back on me," the Doctor replied.

* * *

Rose stumbled back from the man before her. His bleached blonde hair stood out in the lamplight and the crazed smile on his face sent shivers down her back. His eyes were wild, fueled by a feral hunger, and they were locked intensely on her face. The power of her gaze was frightening but also inexplicably familiar. He stalked towards her, and she opened her mouth to scream.

"Shh," he whispered, clamping a hand over her mouth.

Her eyes narrowed and she thrust the heavy gun under his ribs as best she could. He gasped, stepping back abruptly. He shut his eyes tightly in pain, but when they opened the hunger was accompanied by fierce anger.

"Stay away from me," she warned, cocking the gun.

The man grinned once before rippling blue energy flew from his hands and blew the gun to pieces. Rose crumpled to the ground, covering her head with her hands as the metal rained down on her. The next moment, her wrist was gripped painfully and she was yanked to her feet. The man was before her once more, closer than before. Their eyes locked and it wasn't long before his eyes widened.

"Rose?" he asked suddenly. "Is it you?"

"Who are you?" She whispered, not quite as fearful now that he was stepping back.

"You're here," he said. "Oh, Rassilon, you're here, in the proper world. Does the Doctor know?"

"You know the Doctor?" she asked eagerly. "I need to find him, it's important."

"Leave," he ordered, beginning to pace anxiously. "You need to leave right now."

"I can't leave, I've come all this way," she protested.

"I don't care," he said. "If you stay you'll die or some other such thing, and I am not going to be responsible for that. I've killed many people before, but I will not kill you."

"I don't understand..." Rose said.

"Of course you don't,"he muttered. "How could you possibly understand? Where is he? He chases me my whole life and then when I really need him... Doctor!"

Rose covered her ears, but that only blocked out the audible noise. Inside her head, she could still hear him screaming out telepathically to the Doctor. It seemed to last for hours, but eventually, the man stopped.

"Get her out of here," he said.

Rose turned to see who he was speaking to and her knees nearly collapsed. Standing not more than fifty feet away was the Doctor in all his pinstriped glory. His eyes caught hers and immediately his face lit up. Quicker than she could smile, she was flying into his arms and spinning in a laughing, crying circle. His lips met hers in single moment of timeless longing, but he pulled away before she even had time to think.

"I said, get her out of here," the man repeated.

"You're letting her go?" the Doctor asked.

"I have no quarrel with her," he answered. "She made the drumming stop back in the old days, when it could be stopped. I checked on her now and again, and every time..."

He closed his eyes as if savoring something particularly sweet. Rose looked to the Doctor but he was intent on the other man.

"That's what she does,"the Doctor said. "Without even knowing it. She uses the power left by the vortex to fulfill what her compassion on it's own can't. That's why you felt better."

"And your nightmares?" he asked, opening his eyes.

"They don't come if she's with me."

"Doctor," Rose finally cut in. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," The Doctor said, squeezing her hand. "I'll explain later, but first we need to get you back home."

"I can't go home, it's dangerous. You need to know, the-"

"The stars are going out, yes, I know," he said. "You've come a few years too late."

Rose looked at him in shock, her eyes filling with tears. This wasn't fair. She had tried so hard and so long to reach him, and now that she had... it wasn't even the right time. The Doctor's eyes were kind and understanding and his embrace was even more so.

Still holding her tightly, he spoke again. "Thank you... Master."

"It's only for her," he said. "When you return you won't find me so merciful."

"I understand," the Doctor said. "Come on, Rose. I'll help you get back."

Rose allowed herself to be led away, but as she glanced back at the man she couldn't help but feel a pang of regret. Somewhere in her mind she remember those eyes. But they were blue and set in a younger, happier face. A face still filled with the same intensity, but kinder. Koschei. She shook her head, confused. That word meant nothing, but she found it meant everything at the same time.

"Who was he?" Rose asked, as the Doctor fiddled with the teleport.

"That was the Master," he replied. "You're very lucky he left you alive."

"Why is he... familiar?"

The Doctor sighed, putting down his screwdriver, to gently touch her cheek. He traced something on her skin and a vague memory stirred. The dark haired boy who saved her from the car, his friendly smile and intelligent eyes. He had touched her cheek like this once. But no, that was impossible. He had left without even a name.

"You're remembering now aren't you?" he asked, looking into her eyes. "Every time I trace the mark you remember it. Even back on the Tardis before... you used to whisper my old name as you fell asleep."

"Theta," she said aloud and he nodded.

"That's the one," he replied, smiling. "Theta. That was such a long time ago."

"But I..." Rose paused. "I don't remember what happened."

"You will someday," the Doctor said. "Just as you and I will meet again."

"Like we always do," she said as she remembered a single line of conversation. "And we'll fall in love."

"Yes," he said, grinning. "We will."


	45. Chapter 45: I Never Told You

DISCLAIMER: SADLY, NO. I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO

**A/N ****I Never Told You **_**by **_**Colbie Calait **_**is our song. It is a perfect song for the Doctor and Rose by the way. I didn't follow the song, but somebody should make a youtube video for it or something. Now, I must say I'm severely disappointed in you all. I think no reviews is definitely a record, and in case you're wondering it's not a good one! I'm even doing everyday for you. Anyway, this chapter is one of my favorites, I say that a lot though. I do like it though. It's 13 and Rose. :-) That's kind of fun to say actually. I might have to try doing this more often. **_

**I ****Never Told You  
**

Rose woke up, touching her tear stained cheek in shock. The dream had been so real and she could still his voice calling out to her, sad and forlorn. She had never heard a lonelier sound than his voice whispering her name, begging her to listen, to find him.

She stumbled out of bed, barely sparing her rumpled reflection a glance as she left her room. Walking to her Mum's room, she thought hard on the dream. Those stubborn eyes of blue and that voice were so lonely, so undeniably the Doctor. She wondered when he had regenerated and how it happened. All that really mattered was that he was trying to reach her again.

"Rose?" Jackie asked, her voice croaky in the morning.

"I had the dream again," Rose said, settling into the side usually reserved for Pete. "I heard his voice."

"You mean... like it was before?" Jackie asked, suddenly very awake.

"Yeah," she replied. "It's different... he's different, but I know it's him. It feels like him."

Jackie considered her carefully and Rose nearly blushed under her gaze. It had been years since Canary Wharf and Bad Wolf Bay. Everyone expected her to move on and she tried, honestly she tried. No one knew that more than her mum, but then, nobody knew how hard it was like her mum did. She had lived so many years without Pete she could understand Rose's pain. And because she had reunited with Pete, Jackie was able to hope that someday Rose could also be reunited with her love.

"Has he come back for you?" Jackie asked at last.

Rose shrugged. "I don't know."

"If he has, will you go with him?"

The answer was the same though Rose's heart protested. "I don't know."

"We'll wait until Pete gets back from Spain," Jackie said. "I'm not driving all the way to Norway on my own."

Rose laughed and hugged her mother quickly. She could feel tears pricking at her eyes, but she was determined to smile. She was going to see the Doctor.

* * *

The beach was just as cold and miserable as before and Rose felt even more anxious the second time around. The misty sea spray sparkled bravely in the air wherever the sun peaked through the clouds. The crashing waves and the crush of pebbles beneath her feet were strangely calming. After the ever constant hum of the Tardis, she always found the repetition of sound to be the most comforting thing in the world.

"Rose."

Rose whipped around, catching her breath as the fear and hope battled inside her. As the dreams had led her to believe, his eyes were blue, darker than her first Doctor's had been and older as well. They very nearly matched the Tardis which made her smile. His hair was a teasing sandy blonde, hanging loosely past his ears. His clothes were simple, just a pair of jeans and a plain white shirt. It was honest and open just like his face. She loved him at first sight.

"Doctor."

"I should probably tell you right now," he said as she walked closer. "I'm dying."

"What?" She stopped in her tracks. Any hope she had been entertaining was silenced in a single instant.

"I know I don't look it,"he said apologetically. "It's true though. I haven't got any regenerations left. Next time I die, I'll die forever."

"But.." Rose paused, completely at loss for words. What could she possibly say to this?

"Originally I was going to save this visit until I was old and wrinkled," the Doctor said. "Knowing all the trouble I get into, I figured I wouldn't actually live that long."

He was grinning, but it was kind of grim smile and Rose's laugh was less than heartfelt. She searched his eyes, looking for anything but what he was actually saying. It couldn't be true. He was lying. She wiped her cheeks angrily, hating the tears that wouldn't stop now that they had started. This was just like last time.

"How long has it been for you?" he asked, politely ignoring her tears.

"Five years," she managed after a moment.

"Still at Torchwood?" the Doctor asked.

"Yep." She smiled a true genuine smile then as she spoke, "I tried leaving a year ago, but as it turns out they couldn't function without me."

"Of course no, you're brilliant." He grinned as he spoke, his eyes sparkling with pride.

She ducked her head. "Thanks."

They were silent for a moment, but Rose didn't feel any pressure to speak. It was simply enough to look at his beautiful, kind face and hear the waves beside them. She didn't know whether touch was allowed this time, but when she held out a hand, he took it. His hand was warm and strong, slipping perfectly around her own. She stepped closer and they began walking down the beach together.

"No ring I see,"he commented as if it were the most ordinary topic in the world.

She blushed, avoiding his curious eyes. "No ring."

"Boyfriend?" The Doctor asked and Rose could just imagine a hint of jealousy in his voice.

"No boyfriend either," Rose answered, laughing when he pulled her closer in.

They kept walking, now having to avoid tangling their legs together. It became an easy rhythm, a walk that felt more like a majestic waltz. She swung their hands, childlike giddiness filling her. Of to be like this all the time.

"I miss you, you know," She said quietly when they slowed to a stop.

He looked down at her, his face etched with sadness. She touched his cheek, surprised to find her finger wet.

"I miss you too," he murmured. "It's been so long for me... but I still think of you every day."

"Are... are you on your own?" Rose asked afraid at whatever answer he could give. Yes and she would hurt for his pain, no and she would be jealous.

"Sometimes," he answered with a shrug. "People come and go. Mostly they go."

"I'm sorry," she said.

"I'm sorry too," The Doctor replied, his eyes cloudy with tears. He shook his head to clear it, forcing away the tears. "I didn't come to talk about my life, not really. I came to apologize."

"For what?"

"Last time... there was so much I wanted to say, so much you needed to hear," he said. He was growing agitated, dropping her hand to pace back and forth. "Of all the things I regret, that day is one of the worst."

"It's okay," Rose soothed. "It didn't need said. I knew."

"But I never told you!"

The Doctor turned abruptly to face her, his eyes intense as they locked on hers. In that moment, suspended in his gaze, her being caught on fire until she was burning with the same intensity he was. Her heart jittered like a drum in her chest, pounding a delicious rhythm that whispered with each pulse beat. _You're loved, you're loved, you're loved. _

"I never told you," he whispered, suddenly close enough to kiss. "And I should have. That's why I'm here. Because you need to hear it from me. I love you, Rose Tyler. I loved you then, and I love you now."

Rose's breath caught in her throat, but it turned out she didn't need it as his lips found hers. His mouth was gentle but burning with a longing that had lasted a lifetime, perhaps several lifetimes. She kissed him back with the same need, the same relief to finally be in his arms again. He pulled away, but the sweet taste of bananas lingered on her lips.

"Come with me?" the Doctor asked, grinning like a toddler.

"With you?" Rose smiled, her eyes shining. "For how long?"

"Forever."


	46. Chapter 46: In Her Eyes

DISCLAIMER: I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A PIECE OF DEAR, DEAR SHOW. HOWEVER, I'M OUT OF LUCK.

**A/N**_** The song is **_**In Her Eyes **_**by **_**Josh Groban **_**today. **__**The title isn't so much in the chapter as in here. Now I personally don't believe the Bad Wolf is a seperate entity, rather just a part of Rose. However, for the sake of the story, let's just say she's her own being. So, this is the Doctor and Rose, in **_**her **_**eyes. Halfway through writing I kind of changed it a bit, but I still like it even with the random change in dynamic. See the bottom A/N for schedule excuses/details. And thanks so much for the reviews!  
**_

**I****n Her Eyes**

I don't think there has ever been a stupider time lord in the history of time lords than the Doctor. All right, so that's an exaggeration, but still. I mean look at the man, he has all he ever wanted staring him in the face and he doesn't take it. Granted he thinks it's for the best, but it only makes him lonely. If he would just tell the girl... that dear, sweet girl. He's in love with Rose you see. I don't have to be inside his head to see the way he looks at her.

I am, however, inside Rose's head a good portion of the day. She sees in him all the goodness that the universe has to offer. His smile lifts her spirits every time, and his touch makes her giddy inside. It doesn't take much to send this girl flying. That's one thing I love about being a part of her. I get to feel the racing heart beat and the flush of blood in her cheeks. It makes me happy to know she's in love. I've been with her since birth, always watching over her, and this is the only time her emotions have so completely overwhelmed me.

Unfortunately, the hero of the story is being less than heroic at the moment. I just do not understand how he can be such a dolt. Meanwhile poor Rose's heart is slowly starting to break. Mind, she knows he cares for her, but she still wants his arms, his kisses, his hearts. Obviously, he's been less than generous with those things. Hence, my newest plan.

Now my earlier plans haven't been entirely successful. In fact, they usually take a turn towards... well, death. Like that time on the Game Station, or in Scotland, and don't even get me started on the tragedy that was the Pompadour Plan. I spent the next month alternating between freak accidents involving ice water and moving the hallways so the Doctor frequently ran into the Rose and I mean that quite literally.

Anyway, those 'adventures' are beside the point because this time I've got the perfect plan. It's even better than the Cassandra/New Earth plan which, so far, has been one of the most effective. I didn't even plan for half of the cute romantic moments that seemed to pop up. I do admit I may have jacked up Cassandra's emotions just a little to procure that kiss..

I call it the Swimming/Poseidon Plan. I'll keep my eye out for the Loch Ness monster or something, but I'm confident this one will pull through danger free.

It's a simple enough task to convince my sister sentient being to land our favorite couple on the gorgeous planet Poseidon. It's a tad harder to remedy the pouring rain before the Doctor sees it. Weather has never been my specialty.

By the time the two of them stumble out of the Tardis, I've managed to to get rid of the rain and calm the midnight blue waters. After that, I sit back to supervise and intervene when necessary.

"It matches the Tardis," Rose says, her face shining. I know because I add a little extra glow to enhance her own luminescence.

"And your swim suit," the Doctor replies.

She's surprised and I must say so am I. She glances down and sure enough, her swim suit is rich blue with ruffles and tucks and frosting of silver glitter. I throw in a silver rose with my name hidden in the petals just for fun. Neither seem to notice the change.

Rose approaches the water hesitantly as the Doctor lays out the blanket and picnic. She steps in, smiling immediately. Poseidon doesn't require my help to make it's water pleasant. It stays warm and smooth at all times. The two suns are set perfectly around the planet to maintain the warmth all year round. They also allow for a Star Wars sunset with one rising as the other sets. I suspect or perhaps just hope, that this will create a romantic atmosphere and encourage the Doctor to action.

"Coming, Doctor?" Rose says, now skipping in the gentle waves.

I'm a bit worried he won't respond properly. That mischievous grin is not promising. He's going to spoil it all by starting some ridiculous game. He's supposed to take her hand and walk side by side down the beach, whispering all the most wonderful memories. Instead, being the child that he is, he takes off at a dead sprint towards her. Great stars above, he doesn't have a clue how to be romantic.

Rose is just as bad. She runs her little heart out, giggling madly with each step. Her stride can't compare with his though. She's like a poodle trying to out run the leopard. He catches her around the waist, to the sound of her happy screams. All right, so maybe he's not doing bad. The way their bodies lean together, the natural flow between the two of them. It's beautiful. And a tad romantic I guess.

Somehow they end up falling back, spraying water and sand everywhere. I've got to give the Doctor some credit, but really my help definitely has it's place. I pride myself in directing the fall into one grand symphony. The Doctor lands first to knock some sense into him and Rose falls gracefully on top of him. Their eyes lock and I can feel the intensity burn. Her heart's beating at twice it's normal speed and the Doctor's no different. He's going to kiss her now, I just know he will. All my plan will succeed and they'll admit it once and for all. Oh please let them admit it.

I'm so focused on the Doctor, waiting for him to make the first move, that I completely forget about Rose. She pulls herself off and slides into the sand beside him. How could she... I don't understand. He was right there; he was about to give in. Why didn't she just let him? Oh, Rose. You silly, silly girl. If I had a body of my own I think I'd be crying right now. After all my careful planning, and it was _Rose _who blew it. I've never felt so frustrated in my life. She's as bad as he is.

Still, I might be able to put the plan back together. All is not lost yet.

Their game is over, and it shows in their faces as the smiles slowly fade in thoughtfulness. They move only to lock hands, despite the water lapping over them. It's a peaceful moment full of hope and... full of promise too. Not a word is spoken, but the silence is more telling than ever before. He won't leave her. Even if he never says the words, my Rose will have a place at his side. I should be satisfied, I know, but I can't help myself. I want that kiss...

I'm desperately avoiding playing with the hormones. That's against the rules, Cassandra being the exception of course. What else can I do though? As Rose so clearly demonstrated, nothing short of force is likely to bring them together. I suppose I'll wait. You never know when the Doctor might pull something romantic out of his sleeve again.

"I met Poseidon once," the Doctor says, but not in his bubbly guess what voice. Instead his voice is subdued.

"He's not really a god, is he?" Rose asks.

"Well... not like the Greeks thought," he answers. "He was essentially human."

"Essentially?"

"He was given many, many years to live. It was meant as a gift, but in the end it became a curse. He lived a long full life, but it was also a lonely life," the Doctor says wistfully. For a moment, I wonder if perhaps he's speaking of himself. For all the sadness in his eyes, he might as well be.

"He sounds an awful lot like you," Rose says, and I think her gentleness is just what he needs.

"I suppose he is. I've got the better end of the deal, though."

"Why is that?" Rose asks. I'm a bit curious too. I guess this shoots down our theory of him talking about himself.

"Because I get to have you." That's when I know with no doubt whatsoever that he'll love her forever. I'm also starting to see, perhaps he doesn't _really _need my help. He comes up with these one liners and they're so much more powerful than any flowery speech. They shoot right to the heart of a person, specifically this person named Rose. I think she's melting on the spot.

She smiles up at him, her eyes sparkling brighter than I could ever make them. He smiles back down, squeezing her hand. I wouldn't change a thing about this moment. But a moment is all it is, before the Doctor's pulling her to her feet. They splash back to the picnic, basking in the dusky glow of the twin suns. The remainder of the day is absolutely normal, teasing and laughter with lots of running about the beach. It's not what I planned, but it's good just the same. Today was a step in the right direction, and tomorrow will see another. And who knows, maybe someday all the little steps will add up. Preferably soon, but someday.

* * *

**A/N **_**So I chewed you out about reviews and then didn't update for week. First, I wasn't really chewing you out, or at least I didn't mean to be. I was more surprised than anything else. Second, I was really planning to update but we went on vacation. I knew we were going but I forgot we wouldn't have Internet access. Unfortunately, I'm leaving again tomorrow. I won't have access that I know of so today's chapter will probably be the only one this week. And even more unfortunately I'm busy all of next week, and the week after that. However, I might have time next Saturday and that following week, I've got some time in the evenings so I will still try to update. Next week though, you can pretty much count out unless I get seriously lucky. **_


	47. Chapter 47: Just For You

DISCLAIMER: SIGH. I REALLY WISH I DID, BUT I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N**_** The song is **_**Just For You **_**by **_**William Tell**_** or possibly **_**Lionel Richie. **_**I don't actually know which is on my playlist, but I personally like Tell's song best. Well... I didn't actually listen to Richie. If you didn't catch it I'm just randomly looking this up on youtube. My playlist is far away at the moment. It's actually ten feet away on my kitchen computer. I'm a tad lazy. :-) I really like the chapter today. It's a lot like Chapter Two, but better in my opinion. So I'm sorry if it's a bit repetitive. I did change it up quite a bit, and I was pressed for an idea. Which leads me to my next point. If any of you have a request of any sort... please, please, let me know. Really, I would love your help. I find any ideas I like fly away when I sit down to write.  
Sorry this is late, I did warn you though. It's Friday, nearly Saturday, isn't it? Sheesh, where has my week gone? Oh yeah, I remember, I was helping my brother's family move. So sad... :-( Anyway, that's my mildly lame-o excuse. I'll post tomorrow unless something comes up. (It won't) Enjoy! and review of course :-)**_

**Just For You**

Rose resolutely ignored the Doctor all day. Even when he landed, declaring it time for another adventure, she turned silently away, retreating to the garden. There in the peaceful jungle of aromatic flowers and towering trees thicker than the Doctor's skull, she found some semblance of happiness. She knew he would find her within minutes if she went to her favorite place, but she refused to let that drive her away from the ever-clear waters of the wishing pool. She settled on the mossy side, forgetting for a moment that her jeans would be wet and muddy when she left. Instead, her thoughts flew to the night before as she trailed her hand in the water.

The night had been pleasant enough to begin with. They were on a nice planet, with rolling hills and quaint villages holding their Saturday market. The people were so very nice, but apparently the girls were even more so.

Rose glared at her reflection, feeling angry all over again. It wasn't even a specific girl he had attached herself to this time, but he was _such_ a flirt! Oh, it made her so mad. Little did he know that ignoring him was in all actuality a kindness. She just wanted to smack him.

Now a little flirting wasn't a crime, certainly not in her opinion anyway, but some general rules should be followed. For instance, it was absolutely not necessary to sniff every girl's hair for signs of minuscule aliens, and he didn't need to run his hands all through it either. Secondly, just because all the girls requested it he did not need to remove his shirt and show off the mole on his shoulder. And last but most definitely _not_ least, kissing all the girls goodbye should not be allowed. She didn't care if it was the traditional goodbye or not.

"Rose?"

Rose scampered back behind a massive oak tree, praying the Doctor hadn't seen her. His voice still sounded fairly distant, as if he had only just walked through the door. She sent a silent plea to the Tardis to conveniently drop a few coconuts when he had to walk through the palms on his way in. A loud crack accompanied with a yelp of pain made her smile smugly. It was nice to know the Tardis was on her side.

"Rose?" he called again, closer this time.

If she looked through a crack in the old tree, she could just see him through the vegetation as he made his way on the well worn path to the pool. She sighed softly to herself. He would find her soon.

"Will you talk to me please?" the Doctor asked as he neared the pool. "I know you're in here."

"What do you want?" Rose snapped, staying determinedly behind the tree.

His eyes immediately flicked in her direction, but he wisely chose to stay by the pool.

"To apologize I suppose."

"What for?" She couldn't quite keep the exasperation out of her voice. Well... she didn't try particularly hard.

"That thing I do," he said sheepishly as he tugged his year. "you know."

"Yes, I know, but the I'm not so sure you do."

"Course I know..." The Doctor hesitated, probably stopping to think over everything he had done in the past 24 hours in an attempt to isolate the offending action. "Oh," he said after a moment, "it was the village girls wasn't it?"

"I don't know why you feel the need to apologize for that," Rose said as she came around the tree. She was in no mood for his 'it was nothing' speech. "I don't think you behaved properly, but that's your business, not mine. That's not why I'm angry."

She sat next to the pool again, waiting for his reply. Would he catch her lie or would he move on, thinking up something new to apologize for?

"I think it is," the Doctor insisted, a grin lighting his face. "I think you're mad I smelled their hair.

"And took your shirt off _and _kissed them," she added grumpily before realizing her mistake. She covered quickly. "But no, that's not why I'm upset."

He laughed, sitting down next to her. "Oh Rose, you're a terrible liar. You're mad, but mostly you're jealous."

"Am not." Her voice was stiff even to her own ears. She scooted away from him, her head held high.

"Yes, you are."

The Doctor slid closer, but Rose had no more room to move away. She was stuck. He had abandoned his usual getup for a plain red shirt and blue pants. Now without the customary suit coat, she could see the hair of his arms standing on end. Her own arms were showing similar signs of the static brewing between the two of them. He leaned in close, his breath warm on her ear as he spoke.

"Feeling left out?" She shivered, but managed to shake her head. "Shall I make it up to you?"

"No." Her voice was surprisingly firm given the gymnasts performing in her stomach. "Doctor, you're being ridiculous."

"Maybe," he answered with a smile. He raised up on his knees, eying her hair most intently. "I fear we may have been invaded by little hair-loving creatures known as Oblins. Allow me to inspect your hair for you."

"Don't-" Rose abruptly cut off, as the Doctor thrust his nose into hair.

He sniffed loudly, obnoxiously so, but the way he nuzzled her hair was anything but obnoxious. He stayed like that for many unnecessary seconds, seconds he hadn't spent on the other girls. The way he rubbed his face against her and the soft hum of appreciation were all ready softening her earlier irritation. He then proceeded to run his fingers through her hair, brushing it this way and that under the pretense of searching for oblins. With every touch against her scalp, her heart melted like birthday candles.

"Nope," he said, caressing her ear again with his words. "No oblins."

"That's good, I guess," Rose answered, quickly fixing her face into a scowl. "Still mad at you though."

"Well, perhaps a quick look at my mole will cheer you up a bit." He was grinning madly as he leaned back away from her. "I must say this a very rare honor. It's a very special mole you see."

Rose swore her cheeks were on fire as he easily stripped off his shirt. It was significantly quicker this time without his coat, tie, shirt, and undershirt, but it was no less... oh she hated to admit it, but... it made her all giddy and warm. He smiled slyly no doubt finding her embarrassment amusing. He twisted around so she could see the single little mole. This was not good, she was hardly mad at him at all now. Not that he could know that. She refused to give in so quick. When he turned back to face her, she tossed her hair haughtily.

"Love the mole," the Doctor said. She sniffed daintily. "Still upset with me?"

"No comment," she replied.

"Oh come on now, Rose," he whined, slipping his shirt back on. She refused to be disappointed. "I'm not your enemy."

"Could have fooled me," Rose said.

"I guess... I'll go then." He sighed. "I can see I won't make anymore headway today."

"No, you won't," she agreed. Inside, she was practically in turmoil that her act had worked so well. Here she was, far from being angry any longer, and now he was leaving. Great. Now what?

"I'll see you later then."

The Doctor wrapped an arm around her, scooting her up against him even as he spoke. She gasped, tingling at every point his body brushed against hers. She forgot the last of the three complaints. How could she possibly have forgotten that?

"See you," she whispered breathlessly as his head dipped towards hers.

The Doctor's lips caught Rose's in a sweet innocent kiss, but they were gone just as soon as they had come. She gazed up at him, aware her eyes probably looked quite dazed at the moment. He didn't seem to mind. He smiled warmly, his eyes crinkling at the sides.

"Now," he said softly. "Would I ever have kissed those girls so gently?"

She obediently shook her head, her smile beginning to match his.

"And would I ever have held them so close?"

Again she shook her head.

"And do you know why that is?"

"They have green skin?" Her mischievous grin topped even his answering one, she was sure.

"Silly human," he muttered, not bothering to say the words he felt.

He stole her lips again and her breath as well, as he began working her mouth most thoroughly. She kissed him back eagerly matching him in every way. He smiled into her lips a sensation she enjoyed almost as much as the kissing. Almost. She stole one last kiss before he pulled completely away.

"And that," the Doctor said while smiling widely, "is the sort of kiss, I save just for you."


	48. Chapter 48: Kiss the Girl

DISCLAIMER: DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO, NEVER EVER WILL.

**A/N**_** The song is **_**Kiss the Girl **_**from **_**The Little Mermaid, **_**which I really liked Colbie Caillat's version of by the way. Natrually, the original pretty much rules, but if I had to choose a favorite contemporary version I'd definitely pick hers. Anyway, I like this chapter pretty well. Well, I like half of it the other half... eh, it's all right.  
I'm a little apprehensive. I'm now up to date on watching season six, all but the last episode. Everyone tells me that after watching it I'll learn to like River/Doctor, and these are die hard Rose fans. I'm really hoping they're actually less die-hard than they seem, because I don't want to like the River and the Doctor together. I don't care how tragic their story or how well suited or whatever, I refuse. They don't belong together. Anyway, I'm really worried that I'll learn to accept River's relationship with him. I sincerely hope not. I'll let you know how it goes hopefully on Monday. **_

**Kiss the Girl**

I was just a little girl back then. Only seven years old. We visited my aunt Linda in the country. I remember how strangely open everything was, how pretty the sky was against the fields. I would take off running and just keep going and going. I loved the feeling of my new blue dress spinning freely around my legs, my hair flying back.

"Rose!" Mum called.

I glanced back at her, walking with my aunt and uncle down the lane. She was frowning at me, but Linda was smiling sweetly, her own hair teased by the wind. I think Linda was a lot like me when I was little.

"Don't get that dress dirty," Mum said sternly. "I paid good money for it."

I only smiled in answer before I took off running again. I could just imagine her shaking her head, but it didn't matter. I was on vacation after all; I meant to have fun with it.

I ran all the way to the stone wall running along the property line, panting when I finally slowed. I then took to skipping with my hand stretched out to touch the cool stones. A fair distance down the line, the wall was broken, offering a gateway into the next field. I looked back to the adults only halfway back to the house. I figured they wouldn't mind, and slipped around to the other side of the wall. Much to my surprise, a little boy was chasing a dog not far from me. When his eyes happened to land on me, he stopped immediately, clearly more shocked even than I was.

He was pretty sort of boy with soft brown hair the color of chocolate chips and eyes to match. He was taller than me, likely older than me as well. He wore an old dirty shirt over an equally dirty pair of jeans, his face and arms smudged with dirt and goodness only knows what else. I immediately withdrew my first thought of his being pretty in any way. Still, his face was open and friendly as he walked closer. I liked him from the beginning.

"You're a girl," he said, his voice happy and not mocking at all.

"Well what else would I be?" I asked, eying him curiously.

"No, I mean..." He grinned widely. "You're a kid like me."

"Are there no others?" I was terribly baffled by this. Growing up on the estates, there were more children than I could count. It never occurred to me that other places might not have many kids at all.

"Sure, at school." he said with a shrug. "Little Janey is the closest one, and she's clear on Hillcrest Road."

"Is that far away?"

"Very far." His voice was sad, his big brown eyes clearly displaying his loneliness. "What's your name?"

"I'm Rose. Rose Tyler."

His smile broadened further. "I have roses on my front walk. They're the prettiest flower don't you think?"

I nodded, returning his smile. "What's your name?"

"I'm John Smith." He nodded to the scruffy dog running around their feet. "That's Pilot."

I knelt down to pet the dog, ignoring the dirt clinging to his fur. He was a sweet-tempered dog, friendly and eager. I always wanted a dog, and to me it seemed Pilot would have been the best sort.

"Are you moving in?" John asked, his voice barely containing his excitement.

My little heart fell as I considered the boy before her. "No, I'm visiting my aunt."

John sighed. "I thought it might be something like that."

"I'll be here all week," I offered as consolation.

His face lit up instantly and I found his enthusiasm contagious. He reached out a hand which I gladly took. Swinging it between us, we proceeded to explore nook and cranny the wall had to offer. We parted for dinner under stern promises to explore the river on the next day.

Thus our friendship was born. We spent the next seven days roaming the countryside, creating fantastic worlds all of our own. Stories full of knights and dragons, time travelers and royalty, and some aliens just for fun.

And on my last day, with a oath to meet again next summer, he kissed my cheek shyly in goodbye.

* * *

Twelve years passed, but I never did meet my childhood friend again. Money was tight and so vacations were spent relaxing at home rather than with Linda. The memory of our week spent together stayed with me though, imprinted on my heart.

It was just a few months after my nineteenth birthday when Henric's shut down for remodeling. Having plenty of time on my hands, and a little money to spare, I decided a trip to Linda's might do me some good.

Sure enough, the familiar feeling of freedom slipped in as soon as I returned to the open fields. Linda and Rick now had three kids, who I was more than happy to help with. But every free moment, was spent walking down to my favorite childhood haunts. The old lightning struck tree, the cool swimming hole in the river, and of course, the great stone wall.

I walked along the wall, remembering that days so long ago when I met my best friend in the world. I stopped at the opening, gazing out across the fields, to the red brick house sitting on a little hill. I was tempted to stop by, but then... his family might not even live there anymore. Even if they did, that was no guarantee he would be with them and not off to school or something.

I sighed softly to myself. He had probably changed so much, perhaps he had even forgotten the haphazard girl he once knew. Still... I wanted to see him more than anything, to look in his playful brown eyes and feel his hand in mine.

I turned to go, but out of the corner eye I caught sight of a lean body coming from the direction of the river. I inhaled sharply, wondering if it could be my John. I shook my head, throwing out the silly idea and started walking home. I had only walked a short distance when I heard a voice calling out.

"Wait." It was strong voice, young and masculine. Just as I imagined his voice might sound grown up. I didn't quite want to let myself hope, but strangely I still did.

I turned, smiling as he drew closer. It could only be John. Only his hair could stick up like that. His clothes were a far cry cleaner than before. He looked quite smart in his pinstriped suit, but the grubby converses underneath revealed the messy child still kept inside. As if all that wasn't enough to convince me, Pilot trotted faithfully at his feet, albeit very slowly.

"Rose?" he asked as he came to halt just short of the wall. "Is it really you?"

"Yeah," I said. I was ever so pleased to see him, my tongue prodding out when I smiled.

"It's John," he answered, as if I needed reminding. "Seems like forever since I saw you."

"It practically was forever," I replied.

"Rassilon, you look good," John said, to which I was sure I blushed. His eyes passed over me, and I was suddenly very conscious of my worn out t-shirt and too-big jeans.

"Rassilon?" I questioned, ignoring the heat in my cheeks.

"Picked it up at school," He answered quickly. "I'm going to Medical school."

"Really?" I wasn't terribly shocked. He was clever as a kid, I'm sure that was only a shadow of the intelligence he really had. "I guess I can actually call you Doctor then."

He grinned at the childhood nickname. "That's the idea. How have you been?"

"All right." If my answer was less than believable, he let it go. I didn't particularly want to share the disaster that was Jimmy with him. "Given up on school. I work at Henric's now."

Again, if John was disappointed in me in any way, he didn't show it.

"That's good." He leaned his elbow on the wall, considering me with those deep brown eyes. They seemed to have grown more complex, more powerful since I knew him. They certainly held me in a spell anyway. He was too handsome for his own good these days. Struggling with an inexplicable bout of jealousy, I wondered if he had many girls chasing after him.

"Not really," I finally said in reply. "Sometimes I wish I were smarter. Then maybe I could do something useful."

"Oh don't be ridiculous. You're brilliant."

"Maybe I was when I was seven," I answered.

I expected a smile from him, but what I got was a particularly stern look. I looked at the pebbled ground to avoid his strong gaze.

"Look at me," he said firmly. "You, Rose Tyler, are brilliant. Don't you ever forget it."

I had no answer for him.

"How long are you staying?" John asked at length. I thought I caught a cautious sort of sadness in his tone.

I shrugged. "Depends, I guess."

"Well, let's hope it's a while."

I carefully looked over him, the stiffness that had suddenly taken over, the look in his eyes. He was as lonely as ever, still the sad little boy I had once befriended. That comforted me for some reason. He hadn't changed near as much as I feared.

"Why? Miss me?" My voice was light and teasing, but his face was intense when he answered.

"Very much."

We remained in silence for a moment, looking steadily at one another. This older John was a mystery to me, a puzzle yet to be pieced together. The thought of solving this riddle, excited me. I could spend a lifetime learning what made him the man he was.

"We have new strawberry patch," he said. "Would you like to see it, Dame Rose?"

I smiled, feeling the glee of our youth return. "I would love to, Sir Doctor. Perhaps we might stop on New Earth on our way?"

He grinned madly as he offered a hand. "Of course. You never know when the vicious cats might need taken care of again."

I laughed and John laughed with me. He tugged my hand and we were running through the fields once again, the earth pounding beneath our feet. We never stopped running.

* * *

All of the summer passed, and I stayed the entire time much to my mother's frustration. All she heard from me was about 'the Doctor'. She often feigned annoyance, but I think she was thrilled to see me so happy again, so alive. In truth, I never had been happier. The sunlit hours spent with John were the most full, the most refreshing ever, and the nights spent staring at the stars overhead were by far the most peaceful.

It was on one such night, laying side by side in his backyard that the subject of my leaving was finally broached.

"How long are you staying?" John asked and the fear of losing me was back in his voice.

I turned to look at him, squeezing his hand tightly. "Forever."

He shook his head, but his lips quirked in a smile.

"You'll go back to London someday. You have a job to return to, your mum."

"Doesn't matter," I said resolutely. "I want to stay with you."

It was the closest either of us had come to saying I love you and he knew it. He reached out his free hand, tucking my hair behind my ear. Wonderful as that was, I felt like crying. He wouldn't take so simple of an answer.

"We both know it won't work, Rose," he whispered.

"Who says so?"I replied. "Who says we can't be together?"

John sighed, recognizing he wouldn't get far that night. I won for now, but it was only a small victory, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth.

"Promise me," I murmured, staring straight into his eyes. "Promise you won't leave me."

He returned my gaze, leaning in to kiss my forehead. "Never."

"Thank you."

We laid together until the stars began to fade and the dawn was approaching. I was nearly asleep. Nestled as I was in his arms, I could hardly have pictured a sweeter bed. I shut my eyes, treasuring the feel of his heart beating in tandem with mine. As the sun began to rise, his arms tightened around me and I knew he was thinking of me leaving again. I twisted around to see his face, to hold it gently in my hands.

"Let it go, Doctor," I said. He was struggling, fighting with himself; I could see it in his eyes. Keep me only to lose me, or lose me and save us some pain. I hoped he could see the third option in my eyes. Love me. Love me and never let me go. "Don't waste this moment."

John's eyes fixed on mine and it seemed to give him hope. He relaxed, resting his head against mine, his sweet breath blowing on my face.

"I don't want to lose you," he whispered.

"Then you won't," I promised. "It's a simple as that."

He smiled sadly. "I doubt it. But..."

"But you trust me," I supplied.

"I was going to say I love you," John replied, smiling more. "But that works too."

I suppose I should have said I love you too. It didn't really occur to me, though. At least not until after he was done snogging me senseless. And what an adventure that was.


	49. Chapter 49: Learn to be Lonely

DISCLAIMER: I JUST WATCHED THE NEW EPISODE, BUT I DON'T OWN IT.

**A/N**_** The song is **_**Learn to be Lonely **_**written by **_**Andrew Loyd Webber. **_**This one is written for enchantment1972. She requested a continuation from the last chapter so here it is. I got a bit carried away though and it ended up really, really long. So I'm splitting it into two. It fits the songs better that way anyways. I hope she's pleased with it, as I didn't really know quite what she was expecting out of it. Here goes anyways. I'll be answering reviews tomorrow.  
Now my River Song rant. On the bright side, the last episode didn't make a difference in what I thought or felt. The new episode didn't bother me much either. But my friends drive me crazy. I watched it with all of them, but they're not Rose fans. They like her fine, but they're definitely not dedicated to her. It makes me really sad and little mad. I mean, have they no loyalty at all? They don't even like seasons 1 or 2 very much. They're all caught up in the 11**__**th**__** Doctor, Steven Moffat, River Song movement. And I don't understand. I mean I like season 5 and 6, I adore 11, Moffat's not bad, and River I can tolerate. But really? Again, where is the loyalty? Anyway, that's my rant of the day. I hope you benefited from it in someway. :-) **_

**Learn to be Lonely**

The day I left for London, was easily the worst day of my life. I met John by the wall for a last goodbye, a goodbye I never wanted to have. His arms wrapped around me and I held back tears. I didn't want to cry, to make it any harder for him than it had to be. He would go back to his lonely life. No matter how many friends he had back at school, I knew his heart would never be satisfied. There was just an emptiness inside, that not even I could fill completely.

"First chance I get," he whispered in my ear. "I'll come see you."

The promise was a beautiful one, but I knew he couldn't. He would never find the time in his helter-skelter life. That's what made the summer so great, I thought. For three months, he had slowed down long enough to love a girl like me.

"Just don't forget me," I said, feeling the tears come closer and closer.

"Course not," he replied "I would never forget my Rose."

I shivered at my name but his next words were far more powerful.

"I'll think of you everyday," John said.

He kissed me, and I never wanted him to stop. I clung to him, desperate to hold on to him forever. I knew it couldn't last, but that didn't stop me from holding as tight as I could. His shoulders started to shake and I was sure the tears on my cheek were not my own. It took a lot to make my Doctor cry. That he would cry for me, said how much he really did care.

"Now get out of here," he murmured when he pulled away. "Leave before I can't let you anymore."

"I don't want to leave," I protested. "I want to stay with you."

John sighed, but he was smiling. "We talked about this before. It's okay, Rose. You need to go."

Cold hysteria was starting to clench my stomach. What had I been thinking? How did I ever agree to leave and return to London? Why did I let him talk me into?

"No, I'm not going," I shook my head vehemently. "I'm never going to leave you."

He looked me straight in the eyes and I could tell his determination matched mine. "Let me go. Rose, let me go right now."

"No." It wasn't even a whisper, just a near silent breath slipping out.

I started crying, as he removed the arms slipped around me. I moved into the bawling area when John forcibly took my arms from around his neck. By the time, he turned me around, I was into such a state I couldn't resist. Not even when he pushed me, did I hold back. I started running as was his plan. I ran and ran, my tears dangerously blurring my vision. I nearly tripped a number of times on my way back. Finally as I reached the edge of the yard, I dared to look back. I could still him, a lone figure by the wall. Must he always be alone? I nearly ran back right then, but Rick came out of the house. He called me inside, and for some incomprehensible reason I went.

As I was packing away the last of my things, I realized I hadn't told John I loved him. It was the last time he would ever hear it from me for a long time, and I had been too emotional to say it. I curled into the bed and cried for a very long time after that.

Linda came in, resting a hand a hand on my trembling shoulder. I looked to her with mascara scarred cheeks and bloody eyes.

"It's time to go," she said.

She took me by the hand and led me from the house. I followed obediently. Some crazy part of me was hopeful, that perhaps John would be there, waiting to say goodbye one last time. He wasn't.

The train station was full of people, but I never had felt more alone. For the first time, I finally understood the loneliness that plagued John. I walked slowly towards the train, knowing that as soon as I boarded it would truly mean the end of the summer and the end of my adventures with the Doctor. I looked out over the crowds one last time as I got to the train. My breath caught in my throat. There he was, pushing his way through the crowds to reach me.

I smiled even as the tears made a return. He was coming.

"Rose!" He called as he approached.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Burning up all my cash, just to say goodbye," he replied. "Do you realize how far this station is from home?"

John was getting closer but there was still too many people between us. I couldn't kiss him soundly like I wanted to do so badly.

"Yeah, I did have to ride here too you know."

The train whistle blew and the sound shattered my heart. It couldn't be time to leave yet. The way his face fell told me he was just as frustrated as I.

"Do you remember the time we hid under the porch from my mum?" He asked.

I was a little puzzled at his random reminiscence at a time like this, and a little surprised he chose that memory. That was in the early days, when we were both little kids.

"She was the werewolf and we were locked in the library of an old manor in the 1800's," I replied. I smiled at the memory. When we finally came to help with yard work, we made sure to squirt her with the hose and 'kill the beast'.

"Do you remember what I told you?"

I nodded. He had promised he would always find me. Someday when we're old and big, he said, I'll come find you and we'll run away together.

"I still mean it,"John said. A piece of my heart restitched itself. "Every word."

"I'll be waiting," I replied. It really was time to go, but I couldn't quite bring myself to leave just yet. "I love you, Doctor."

By this time, he had made his way through the people. He was only a few feet away, but I found I couldn't bring myself to hold him, knowing I would never let go if I did.

"Quite right too," John said, grinning. Whenever I used his nickname, he lit up like a star. It was as if the very name was a promise that I would always be his best friend, his love, his Rose. "And if it's my last chance to say it..."

I shook my head. It wouldn't be the last time. We would make it work. Somehow, it would work out in the end.

"Rose Tyler,"

"Time to go ma'am." I glanced up at the man behind me, suppressing the urge hit him.

"Just one more minute please," I begged.

The man shook is head, and offered a hand to help me up. I took it, throwing one last tearful look at John. He had time to say it; the words were on the edge of his tongue. A sob caught in his throat and he couldn't form the words I was waiting for. I heard them anyway.

The train started to chug forward and I pressed a hand to the window. He raised a hand in goodbye, mouthing the words I couldn't hear. That was my last view as I pulled out of Bad Wolf Station. My Doctor, telling me he loved me.

* * *

Life moved on, but I never did. I woke in the morning and my first thought was of John. I went to work, seeing his phantom face everywhere I turned. I refused to work in Men's clothing anymore. If I did, I never left the section of pinstriped suits. I went home at night, and crossed another day off my calendar, counting up to my vacation when I could maybe see him again. I went to night school, determined to live up to his continued faith in me. I wrote him a letter every night. Email would have been so much easier, but apparently he didn't have one or it was for work or something like that I didn't remember. Similarly, calling him was next to impossible. He never had his phone with him. I talked to him all of one time in the few months that followed. I went to bed at night, and he was my last thought.

Soon, I started receiving letters back and they were my single tie to the living world it felt like. John wrote about Martha Jones, his assigned partner from the year before. She was bright, but suffered an acute form of love sickness as the Doctor put it; specifically she was in love with him. On the bright side, she wasn't his partner anymore, so they only ran into each now and again. Also, an old friend of mine, Jack Harkness, had run into John and they were now friends. However, John experienced some serious jealousy from what it sounded like. He could use some though. It taught him to think about how I felt about Martha from time to time.

The best news I ever received was that he had found a friend in one Donna Noble. I didn't know why, but I liked her simply from reading John's letters. She didn't make me jealous like Martha. She seemed good and kind, just what John needed. The more time went on, the more evident it was how close they had become. She was the sister he had always wanted and needed. She filled up that emptiness in his heart, perhaps not all the way, but I thought that if ever we could both be around him, the emptiness might leave completely. Family and love, his two greatest desires. Finally, he was finding both.

By the end of October, I had saved enough money to manage a visit with John. I had work off the first weekend in November which made my decision quite simple. I tried calling, but he didn't answer, as per his usual. It didn't bother me terribly. It would be an adventure to show up without warning. At least that's what I thought.

It was an adventure, but only because I honestly couldn't find him. I tried so hard. I had never been so discouraged in my life. I was always two minutes behind, ten steps too far away. A few times, I even saw him. I shouted his name, but their where too many people and he was too far away. He never turned around, and I could never catch up. On one such occasion, I slumped to the ground more than ready to go home.

"All right?" A lady asked. She was tall with red hair, her expression concerned.

"Sure," I answered bitterly. "Did you know love sucks?"

"Tell me about it," she replied, sliding down next to me. "My fiancée cheated on me a few months ago."

A dim memory stirred in my head, but I pushed it to the side. It wasn't important. "At least you found out before the wedding."

"It was the day of actually. I ran into this guy and he was seriously wasted. He made me late for my own wedding, trying to help out. Anyway, he went with me to find my fiancée, but when we did find him, he was with this other girl. She has spidery long legs, you know. I hate leggy girls. They get all the guys."

"Not the good guys," I pointed out. Suddenly, my troubles weren't so important when her own pain was so clear in that moment.

"Lee was a good guy," Donna said mournfully. I raised my eyebrows. She didn't have another sad story did she? Love really did suck. "I met him in the library, but I had to leave. That guy who I met before my wedding, was all excited about something and needed me right away. Anyway, I went back to find Lee, but he was gone. I really thought we had a connection, you know? I honestly could see myself with him in ten years, a couple of kids, a little house."

"Hey, you never know," I said, putting my arm around her. "I met this guy once..." I smiled to myself as I remembered meeting John for the first time. "I knew him for a week, but I loved him. I didn't see him for _twelve years. _But I found him again. Sometimes you have to have a little faith."

"Funny, that happened to a friend of mine," she said absently. I wondered if she could possibly know John, but I doubted it. "But if you found him, why the sadness now?"

"He left for school," I explained. "I'm supposed to be visiting, but I can't find him."

"Oh." Donna looked at me sympathetically. "Well, best of luck. I've got to run."

"It was nice to meet you," I called, as she left.

"You too."

It wasn't until I got back home and was reading over my letters again that I realized Donna Noble's fiancée had cheated on her.


	50. Chapter 50: Let it Begin

DISCLAIMER: I JUST WATCHED THE NEW EPISODE, BUT I DON'T OWN IT.

**A/N ****Let it Begin **_** by **_**Julie Yardley **_**is the last song in this set of three AU chapters. I hope you've all enjoyed the ride. I might post this three as a separate story as well. Do you guys think I should, or just leave them here? Again, many thanks to enchantment1972 for her request. It pretty much made my day because these last two have been great to write. I put more run tie-ins in again. I hope I didn't go overboard, but they really are so entertaining for me!  
Okay, now the excitingness of the day. I'm halfway through! How crazy is that? Hopefully, I don't take a whole another year to finish! Anyway, do you remember back in chapter 25 I asked you all to pick your five favorites? Well now I'd like to hear your top ten. They can be from the first 25 or the second 25 it doesn't matter. I'll post the results next chapter as well as my own personal favorites. The more people that weigh in, the better. Thanks!**_

**Learn to be Lonely**

Christmas was coming, but I hardly noticed. The buzz of people around me, the busyness. It held no thrall for me. To me, it was if all the stars in the sky were going out, one by one. The walls of my world were slowly crumbling without John.

Still, I did my best. I finished a semester of school, ready for another anytime. I got promoted at Henric's as well. I was putting the pieces of my life back together, even as I experienced the worst sort of heartbreak inside.

I was busy on a building a useless contraption in the living room (a new habit I found I liked) when my cell rang. I glanced at the number on the screen in shock. He was calling me. He was really calling me!

"Doctor?" I asked hesitantly.

"Rose!" he cried. "Rassilon, it's good to hear your voice."

"Yeah, you could have called earlier," I did my best to keep the bitterness out of my voice.

"Sorry about that," John replied sheepishly. "Listen a friend of mine is coming up to London and I was wondering if there was anyway she could stay with you?"

I didn't dwell on the disappointment that he couldn't come. It was enough to hear his voice again. "Probably. It's not Martha is it?"

"No." He laughed. "It's Donna. You'll like Donna I think."

"I'm sure I will." I didn't mention we had already met.

We talked for a half hour or so, but he had to work on his final term paper. I tried not to cry when he said goodbye.

* * *

The day Donna was set to come, I was a flurry of activity. Even if she wasn't John, she was a good friend to me. Or at least she had been the one time I met her. I even got her a few presents for under the tree. I didn't actually know how long she was staying, and if that included Christmas day, but I figured I'd prepare just in case.

I went outside to wait, tapping my fingers impatiently. I hoped she would find it all right, but it really wasn't difficult to find. I hoped she liked me, and I wondered what she would say when she found out I was the one she'd talked to that day.

A taxi came and I watched anxiously as Donna stepped out. She caught sight of me and smiled. I walked towards her, hugging her when we met.

"Why didn't you tell me it was you that day?" Donna asked when I pulled away. "I knew where John was the whole time."

"I didn't know it was you until I got home," I answered.

"After I left you I started thinking about the twelve years and I thought, that's way too weird to be coincidence. I asked John and sure enough he said it was you. I've never seem him so miserable."

"What did he say?" I asked.

She smiled slowly. "Why don't you ask him yourself?"

I looked at her in shock, but she just turned to look at the man getting bags out of the back of the taxi. I originally had assumed it was the driver, but now... I tried to still the sudden hammer in my heart as he straightened up.

"Doctor," I whispered.

"Yeah," he said.

Somehow I found myself in his arms, as he leaned back against the taxi to absorb my impact. His lips were on mine but I ended up laughing more than I was kissing.

He pulled away to look me in the eyes.

"Forgive me?" he asked.

I nodded immediately.

"I love you, you know," he said.

"Love you too."

John pulled me into hug, and I could feel his smile shining around us. I imagine it was almost as bright as my own. Three months felt like three years, but none of it mattered now that I'd found his arms again. Safe and secure, I felt the doom and gloom fall away in fire. Reality was clear again, set in it's course. John had returned and I was with him. The prospect of forever loomed before us.

Donna was smiling throughout this whole time, clearly pleased with her part in making it happen. I pulled away from John to hug her again.

"Thank you," I whispered.

* * *

Christmas vacation passed quickly. It was truly was the happiest time of the year in my home. Our little flat was crowded, but the warm feeling in the air made up for it. Mum finally got to meet John. He was confused when she slapped him, but he became even more lost when she followed it up with a kiss right on the mouth. She was never a shy one.

I spent my time wrapped in John's arms, content to never leave again. Together we passed hours reliving childhood memories and making up new ones to share. When a few lights on our tree exploded , the first explanation was remote controlled trees, of course. And the creeper hanging around the neighborhood, who dressed as Santa, was an alien trying to kill the Doctor. Donna even added her own two cents worth with a theory on what the Earth was really formed around.

For New Years, we all managed a visit to the country. John and Donna stayed at his house, Mum and I at Linda's. The classic meeting place at the stone wall came into use again as John and I roamed the snowy landscape with Pilot ever faithful at our heels. Donna came with us some of the time, but mostly she let us make what we could of our time left together.

We didn't have very much time left at all. In almost no time at all, we found ourselves at Bad Wolf Station yet again. John and Donna would be leave first, and Mum and I would stand by and watch them go. My heart broke just at the thought.

I stood with John as the other passengers rushed to board the train. He held my hand tightly in his as if his fingers were frozen to mine. When his brown eyes found mine, they were burning with urgency. His whole body, vibrated with the intensity.

"I found you, Rose," He said softly. "Just like I promised I would, all those years ago."

"I suppose you did," I answered.

"But I haven't... I haven't run away with you, yet."

I smiled sadly. "You will someday, John. We'll figure it out."

"No. We need to figure it out now," He said.

I remained silent, as I watched his face so charged with emotion.

"I only have one life, and I went to spend all of it with you."

If I hadn't been watching his face and seen his mouth move I wouldn't have believed the words. They were too beautiful, too good for it to be true. But I could see the love in his eyes, feel his pulse throbbing in too-fast-time right along with mine. He really meant it.

"We'll grow old together," I whispered.

"Together," John repeated.

To my surprise and joy, he knelt down then. Yes, knelt down as in on one knee. I had the urge to cover my mouth, but instead, I toyed with the seam of my jeans. My heart was swelling so much I thought my body might explode with trying to keep it all in. I could see all of time, spanning before us. The present, so blinding, the past, so tender and sweet, and the future, a world yet to be explored. It was almost painful in it's joy. I loved him so much!

"Rose Tyler," John said, smiling up at me. "Will you come with me through time and space as my companion and friend?"

I laughed aloud at his unusual proposal, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw Donna role her eyes.

"That is," he continued. "Will you marry me?"

"Yes," I murmured, tears falling from my cheeks. "Yes, I'll marry you."

"Good. Come here."

John opened his arms wide and I fell into them with another laugh. He carefully brushed away my tears, grinning like a fool. I wondered if perhaps his chest hurt as much as mine. Surely he couldn't be so happy as I?

"You know Rose," he said. "I think you need a Doctor."

It was cheesy, but it brought all the happy days of childhood to my mind. I let it's cheesiness pass, savoring the taste of his lips as they found mine. At the start of a wide new world before us, I thought, together, we were going to be fantastic.


	51. Chapter 51: Love Like This

DISCLAIMER: REGRETTABLY I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**I'm terribly sorry that this took so long. I'm also sorry it's short. I'm so worn out and tired though, this is the best I could manage. Here's hoping I do better soon. I probably can't post tomorrow but I'll see what I can do for Monday. The song is **_**Love Like This **_**by **_**Natasha Bedingfield and Sean Kingston. **_**The title doesn't really tie in all that well either so sorry for that too. Oh and since I only had one person give me ten favorites, I don't have any results to report. If you would like to amend this problem feel free to do so. If ten intimidates you give me five or two or one or seven, just something. Or if not... it doesn't matter that much anyway. Thanks for reviewing everybody. I'll hit 200 hundred by next chapter unless something terrible happens. :-) Thanks for your support. **_

**Love Like This**

"Doctor?" Rose said quietly, pushing open the door.

He was sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at the blank wall before him, but upon hearing her voice, he glanced up quickly.

"Rose?" He asked in disbelief. "Is it really you?"

Rose smiled to see him in his sky blue pajamas, his hair even messier than ever. Two years of never seeing his face, and now she caught him in his jim-jams.

"Who else has a key and would pop in unannounced at two in the morning?" She asked with a laugh.

He grinned. "Oh you might be surprised."

They stood across the room, silently regarding the other. She took in every detail of his face, the twist of time in his brown eyes, the arch of his eyebrows, and the strands of hair falling across his forehead. Physically, he was unchanged, but she looked inside his heart and felt the sadness that had settled in. Sadness for losing her. It almost made her smile to know how much he needed her.

"When did you get back?"

"A few weeks ago. I've been looking for you ever since."

The Doctor smiled, patting the bed beside him.

"You knew, didn't you," Rose asked as she crossed the room. "You knew I'd find my way back."

"I hoped you would," he replied.

"But why... why didn't you tell me?" she asked. "I could have gotten back so much sooner."

The Doctor looked straight in her eyes as he lightly brushed at her loose hair. "I wanted to give you the chance to move on. I'm assuming your return means you didn't."

"Have you?" Rose nearly trembled with fear as she spoke. She had worked so hard to find him again; it just wouldn't be fair to lose him then.

"Do you need to ask?"

Rose controlled her urge to hit him for that, which was made especially easier by the lips that abruptly found hers. She fell into the kiss, short as it was, smiling sweetly at him when he pulled away.

"I love you, Doctor," She murmured softly.

The Doctor's eyebrows rose to the gleaming galaxies above, and his grin beat the Nile by a good hundred miles.

"At least you're not crying this time," he teased.

"I can do that," Rose replied, her tongue finding it's way out her mouth in a giddy smile. "At least you're not burning up a sun."

"I can do that."

"I'd rather just hear you say it," Rose said.

"I can do that too." The Doctor's eyes sparkled and the hand curled around hers was warm and strong, his pulse rapid and unsteady. "I love you, Rose Tyler."

Rose kissed him soundly and she didn't have any plans for letting him go anytime soon. If she spent the next ten years of her life kissing him, she would die happy. But then again, if she spent even just the next ten seconds of her life kissing him, she would die happy. Finally, she was where she belonged.


	52. Chapter 52: Love Song

DISCLAIMER: SERIOUSLY WISH I DID, BUT I DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Today's chapter is **_**Love Song **_**by **_**Sara Bareilles. **_**It's also secretly called, **_**Why the Doctor hates Pears. **_**Many, many thanks to all of you wonderful reviewers and for 200 reviews. You guys are so great. Bonus point to Fogsblue with the 200**__**th**__** review. (at least if I counted right.) :-) I will answer all reviews tomorrow.  
So I had a few more people give me favorites so now I have enough to make a list. I also borrowed hope-everlasting's review from a few chapters back for the list, just so you know... If you want to, you are more than welcome to add your own vote as well. I love to hear people's favorites! Personal Favorites can be found at the bottom!  
**_**1) Every Time I hear Your Name (28)  
2) Kiss the Girl Trio (48-50)  
3) Haven't Met You Yet (34)  
4) I'll be Okay (39)  
5) I'm Coming to Get You (40)  
6) Beautiful Mess (11)  
7) Crazy Love (18)  
8) Don't Wake Me Up/ Dream Big (24&25)  
9) The Best is Yet to Come (13)  
10) Feels Like Home (30)**

**Love ****Song**

"Rose, stop eating all my pears," Jackie complained. "You already had one yesterday, and then again this morning and now one for dinner. I won't have any left by the time you leave."

Rose grinned into the pear as she bit it, making a juicy mess of her fingers and mouth. She quickly remedied the situation with a napkin only to make another mess in the next minute.

"You can't blame me," Rose answered when she had finished it off. "The Doctor _never_ buys pears, and I'm not exaggerating. The only fruit he buys is bananas."

"That man..." Jackie shook her head. "I'm surprised he even has time to go grocery shopping at all. Isn't it a bit domestic for him?"

Rose laughed as she cleared away the dinner dishes. "That was the old Doctor. Haven't you noticed he's a lot more... domestic now? We even remodeled my bedroom together. We're doing his next week."

"He does bring you home more often, I suppose..."

"I think it's kind of his home these days too. Well obviously the Tardis is our home, but this is his family now."

Jackie rolled her eyes to hear the Tardis called home, but she let it go without comment. She was grateful the Doctor even remembered to bring Rose at all.

* * *

The next morning, Rose padded around the Tardis kitchen, preparing breakfast. The Doctor leaned casually on the door frame. She hadn't noticed him yet, so he was taking the opportunity to watch her quietly. The radio was going and Rose hummed quietly to herself. The way her hips swung in time with the music, made him smile. Out of nowhere, he found himself wrapping one hand around her waist as he flipped her around.

Rose jumped in surprise, but she giggled when he took her hand in his free one.

"Care to dance, Rosie?"

"I'm making breakfast," she protested, but she made no move to break free.

"It can wait."

The Doctor swayed back and forth, pulling her a little bit closer each time. He threw in a spin now and again just to see the way her smile lit up the room. After one spin, he tugged her back with just enough force to land her against his chest. She looked up at him, her brown eyes wide and hesitant. Her heartbeat was fast against his chest and her humming finally came to a stop.

"You stopped humming."

"You stopped dancing."

"Is this a love song, Rose?" He asked, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Yeah," she whispered. "It's one of my favorites."

"Mine too."

She smiled. "You've never heard it."

"Doesn't matter. I'll never forget it now."

Rose's eyes, so big and caring held him enthralled; he couldn't look away. When he did, it was to glance at her lips just slightly parted. He sighed softly to himself. He hated crossroads. If he didn't act, which happened frequently, he was left with a collection of what ifs. _Choose, Doctor. _He didn't want... he didn't want Rose to become a what if. He wanted her to be a fact of life, a fixed point in time. _Choice Made. _

The Doctor lowered his head, catching Rose's lips with his. She was surprised, but her response was nearly instantaneous. His arms tightened around her even as her arms tangled around his neck. She kissed him back gently, her lips honest and warm. Honest... he didn't know a kiss could be such a thing until he could read every feeling in hers. Heaven couldn't be better than this.

He pulled away just as the song was ending, but kept his arms snug around her body.

"You taste like pears," He said.

Rose grinned shyly. "You like it?"

"Yes... May we have pears for breakfast?"

* * *

The Doctor stared into the flickering fire, a photograph in one hand, a half eaten pear in the other. In the background, a familiar love song played softly. Sitting rigidly on the couch, he felt half-frozen despite the warm fire. His hearts ached and his eyes burned with unshed tears. He had once known Heaven in the arms of Rose, but now he knew Hell as well. It wasn't the burning torture everyone thought. No, it was a cold numbness that made the sunniest day seem to be the darkest night of winter.

He didn't start when Martha came in. Not even when she sat cautiously next to him, did he acknowledge her presence. He made a mental note to save future mourning for a place more private than the library.

"I thought you hated pears," Martha said after a moment.

The Doctor glanced at her once before his eyes caressed the well worn picture. "I do."

Martha followed his eyes to the photo. He expected her to scowl or complain, but she just observed, her face pained.

"Rose?" She asked eventually.

"Yeah."

He thought he would be grateful for the silence, but it left an opening that the song filled. He couldn't listen to the words, not when the memories it brought left such a bitter taste in his mouth.

"This was her favorite song, you know," The Doctor said when the silence pressed too heavily on his hearts.

"It's pretty," Martha replied hesitantly.

"She used to sing it all the time and we would dance together in the kitchen," He smiled for the first time. "Never anywhere else though. The Tardis even has a ballroom, but it never felt right unless we were on the kitchen tiles."

"You loved her a lot."

"Still do."

"I suppose she hated pears too then?"

He laughed, but it was a strangled, painful sound. "No, Martha. She loved them. I loved them too because they were a part of her."

"And now?"

"Now, they turn sour in my mouth." The Doctor glared at the pear as he spoke, tossing it to the flames. "I'm only eating a dead memory."

Martha watched him for moment, and he found it strangely comforting. She wasn't angry or jealous this time. Just worried. She would look after him, keep him from losing it. She would make sure he stayed away from pears and from that blasted song.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as her arms wrapped him. "I'm sorry Doctor."

"Me too."

* * *

_**Beautiful Mess (11)  
The Best is Yet to Come (13)  
Don't Wake Me Up/ Dream Big (24&25)  
Dream of a Normal Death (26)  
Every Time I Hear Your Name (28)  
Feels Like Home (30)  
Haven't Met You Yet (34)  
I'm Coming to Get You (40)  
Just for You (47)  
Kiss the Girl Trio (48-50)**_


	53. Chapter 53: Love Story

DISCLAIMER: I OWN MANY RANDOM THINGS, BUT DOCTOR WHO IS NOT ONE OF THEM.

**A/N **_**Alright we've got **_**Love Story **_** by **_**Taylor Swift **_**lined up for today's chapter. It's not what I intended to write and I had a fairly lame title tie in. However, I hope you all like it. By the way there is a fabulous youtube video you should all see about Doctor and Rose with the Love story Viva la Vida mix. It's phenomenal. I'll post a link in my bio for you if you haven't seen it. Actually, I lied. I went to post the link and it's unavailable now. :-( If anyone happens to know of like a back up channel or something where it can still be found that would be lovely. P.S. For those of you caught up with the episodes. I almost started bawling on the last one and then I was in this depressed funk thing for like two hours. Yeah... it was a little pathetic. Anyway, I'll try and update again soon. Fingers crossed for tomorrow. But I'm going to try and post on Assassinations if I can. Thanks for everything guys!**_

**Love Story**

I was on my way to work when I saw him. I glanced at him as I hurried through the bustle of people, but I never would have known except he stopped dead in his tracks. I happened to glance again and he was still frozen, his eyes carefully analyzing my face. Curious, I turned direction, walking towards him. His eyes widened and I thought he perhaps was going to run. Instead, he extended a hand, pulling me out of the crowd and into a empty side street.

Perhaps, I ought to have been worried. After all, London was not always the safest place in the world. But the warmth and familiarity of his hand held me captivated. He was unrecognizable and more than a little strange with an old fashioned bow tie and suspenders. Still, his blue-green eyes were kind beyond anything... suddenly I saw different eyes in their place, brown eyes full of fire and ice and then the clearest of blue marred only by the sadness they held. I shied away from the memories, reminding myself for the thousandth time that it was impossible.  
_Will I ever see you again? -You can't-_

The memories hurt, but oddly enough I didn't mind the sad ones. It's when I remembered the good things like apple grass and _In the Mood _ that it hurt the most. He made me remember all of it. Every moment spent together.

I looked shyly at his face even as he openly stared at mine. When he brought up a hand to touch my cheek, I flinched away, though I wanted so badly to lean into his gentle hand. He stepped away immediately as if he had been burned, but he still watched me with a burning intensity. I missed the feel of his soft grip on my hand.

"Sorry," he said after a moment. "I didn't mean to..."

"Yes, you did. All you've done is stare at me. You meant something."

"No, I meant... I didn't mean to be here, to see you in the first place."

"How..." I studied him, trying to settle on a sensible emotion. Shock, the desire to be disgusted and frightened, but not the actual emotions, and most surprising of all... excitement, a joyful anticipation were the only things I felt at the moment. "How do you know me?"

"Did I say I knew you?"

"You didn't have to."

"I suppose that makes sense. I must say you've got good instincts, better than the others. You all ready know you know me too."

"I've never seen you in my life," I said, but it felt wrong, like a lie. How could I have never seen such a beautiful creature before? Suddenly, all I wanted to do was touch his face, his hair, memorize every detail. I hadn't felt this way for so long, not since... not since Bad Wolf Bay.

"But that's not quite true is it?" He asked and I that's when I knew. It was him. A wildly different him than I'd ever met before, but the same in the way he turned my heart into a shooting star. I was taken back to the day my life was turned around, the day he changed his face. I relearned the shape of his eyes, the feel of his cheekbones once, I wondered if I might learn it all over again.

"How can you possibly be here?"

"I told you, I didn't mean to."

The question occurred to me then. I didn't want to ask it fearing what he would say, but I had to anyway.

"Why? Why didn't you mean to? When you found out it was possible... what stopped you from coming back?"

"Don't ask me that. I don't even know the answer."

I hated his answer, but at least it was sincere. I believed every word.

"Go then," I whispered. "Go home before you make things worse."

"How can I go... now that I'm here with you?" His eyes turned tender on me, and I almost gave in. But I couldn't live with the pain again.  
Fat heavy tears fell down my cheeks, like comets streaking across the sky. He reached out to brush them away, but I skirted away.  
"Stop it," I murmured. "Just stop talking."

"I missed you."

"It doesn't matter. You need to leave before you regret staying another minute." At that moment, I think I truly knew what it felt like to stab your own heart.

"Why don't you understand, I'm not leaving you."

"And I'm not letting you stay."

We stared at each other across the galaxies between us, measure the strength of the other's will. I remembered a similar on that terrible day at Canary Wharf. That day, my will had been stronger although it helped that secretly he wanted it too. I prayed my heart would not betray me as his once had.

His hand found my cheek and I couldn't bring myself to avoid it. The tears had finally stopped but I felt them waiting in the wings for an excuse to come rushing out. The sweetness of his gaze almost opened the flood gates.

"I want to live the rest of my life with you."

A single tear slipped out, but I held in the rest despite the thundering of my heart. "You know you can't."

"Maybe not, but I still want to."

I smiled weakly. By pulling out a single stone, the hastily thrown up walls around my heart came tumbling down. Great stars, I loved him.

"Just give me this chance."

"This chance you didn't mean to happen?" I countered, putting up one last defense.

"Rule number one, I lie."

I didn't consciously remember crossing the distance, but the next thing I knew I had my arms wrapped around his neck and my lips locked on his. His hands were hesitant and unsure as they tried to find a place to settle, but when they found my hips they were solid and strong. His lips were cool on mine, like a glass of water, but his entire being radiated warmth.

He pulled away sooner than expected, to simply look at my face. He seemed to stare at me a lot lately.

"You know I don't really believe you," I said after a moment.

"You know it doesn't make a difference."

"You won't stay forever."

"But I'll stay. Don't throw away a perfectly good love story here. May I stay?"

I still doubted him, still doubted our future, but I didn't hesitate. "Yes."


	54. Chapter 54: Lucky

DISCLAIMER: I WROTE TO SANTA... BUT FOR NOW, STILL NO DOCTOR WHO OWNERSHIP FOR ME.

**A/N _A __little__ short __and __more __than __a__ little __late. __I __do __apologize__ but __I __hope__ to __be __able __to __be __more __regular __as __we__ start__ into __the__ Christmas __Chapters.__The __only __Christmas-y __thing __about __this __one__ is __the__ snow, __but __the__ next __one __will __be __a__ bit __more __festive. __Anyway__ today__ is _Lucky_ by_ Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat. _Just__ a __friendly __warning, __this__ one__ is __on __the __sad __side. __Don't __worry, __the __coming __ones __ought __to __be __a __little __more __cheery. Also if any of you are interested, I wrote a 11/11/11 story featuring our favorite pairing. :-) It's not my favorite, but it was fun to commemorate the occasion.  
_**

** Lucky**

The snow fell endlessly on his downy head, but the Doctor hardly noticed, so concentrated on the marble stone before him. A girl stood silently to the side, her lithe body little more than a sliver out of the corner of his eyes. Even when she held out her umbrella, his eyes never left the headstone.

"Did you know her well?" The girl asked after a moment.

As if seeing her for the first time, The Doctor turned in surprise. Her dark brown hair was tucked beneath hood, and her gloved hands, played nervously with the zipper on her coat. She was vaguely familiar though he had never met her before. Losing interest, he looked away.

"I asked if you knew her well?"

She was persistent. He sighed softly, hating how much his hearts ached. He wasn't expecting that after all these years.

"I used to,"he finally replied. "A _long_ time ago."  
"I'm sorry." she said quietly. After hesitating she added, "Was it very long ago?

"Yes."

"But you miss her still," she said. "You seem terribly sad."

"That's what happens when you lose someone." He appreciated her odd attempts at comfort, but really he would rather mourn on his own without the presence of a nosy teenager. Seeming to sense this, she spoke up nervously.

"I-I don't mean to pry. It's just... she was my mother."

Taken aback, the Doctor's breath stalled in his throat. Mother? She had a daughter? The ache spread, overtaking all of his chest. He had lost her in more ways then one in just a single day. After he pushed through the initial shock, he regretted how selfish his pain was in the face of this girl. She had lost her mother and was extending her apologies to him. When had he become such an insensitive fool?

"I'm sorry," he offered sincerely. "I didn't know."

"No, I suppose you couldn't have. My name is Grace."

"Call me John." He extended a hand, which she took warmly. Now that he knew better, he could see the anguish in her eyes. They were brown like her mothers, full and caring, but marred with pain and loss. She was barely holding in tears.

"John Smith?" She asked as a glistening tear slips down.

"Yeah." He looked at her quizzically, having expected the reaction he got least of all. Maybe, she had heard stories about him before. The mere idea dulled the numbness which had been his constant companion since hearing the news.

Grace half laughed half cried into her sleeve which reminded him so much of her mother, he found he was fighting back tears of his own. The urge to pull the girl close, to make everything all right again was overpowering, a need he couldn't logically explain. But it was there just the same.

"She always hoped you would come back. But neither of us really expected it to happen."

"I didn't... I-" The Doctor stopped there was nothing to say to that. He had abandoned her just as he abandoned all of them in end. It didn't matter that they broke his heart, in the end he let them down as well.

"It's okay. She loved you anyways."

Precious as that sentence was , he couldn't help the stab of guilt. "What about your father?"

She laugh-cried again. When her eyes met his, the truth began to dawn on him."

"Haven't you figured that out? _You_are my father."

"Grace..." The Doctor whispered. "My Grace." He was filled with astonishment and overwhelming pride to call this strong young woman his own.

She nodded, the tears falling like stars. It wasn't clear who moved first, but the next moment saw the Doctor with his arms wrapped securely around her. She buried her head in his chest to let the tears go and their shoulders shook together. A thousand regrets flashed through his mind, a thousand wishes that he could have been there from the start, a thousand tears for the woman who brought them together, but ultimately couldn't be with them. He soaked in every painful thought, knowing that for every sad moment there were at least two treasured memories to take their place. And for every good memory he had, there were even more memories he looked forward to having. Yes, for all that he had lost, he was a very lucky man. Lucky to have known a love like none other, lucky to have a daughter who loved and needed him as much as he loved and needed her, and lucky to have the hope for the far distant future when he would see Rose again.


	55. Chapter 55: Lullaby

DISCLAIMER: PRETTY PLEASE? NOPE, STILL DON'T OWN IT.

**A/N **_**We've finally made it to a real Christmas Chapter! Yeah! I can't tell you how excited I've been. I was a tad sad this song fell during Christmas as I had other plans for it. Still, I'm happy with how it turned out. The song is **_**Lu****llaby**_** by **_**J****osh Groban **_**according to my playlist, but I also like Billy Joel's song as well**_**. **_**I hope you like it!  
Also, another plug like last time, I posted a Christmas-y story the other day. It's on the weird (and not quiet as good) side, but you might be interested. **_

**L****ullaby**

With Pete gone and Rose sound asleep, Christmas Eve was quiet at the Tyler residence that year. Jackie slept soundly despite the loneliness which had left her in tears earlier that day. Rose was nestled in her crib, but around two in the morning, she stirred. She began to cry, as most babies do, but instead of Jackie another woman gently scooped her up.

"She's having a hard of enough time as it is," the woman said quietly. "No need for you to be waking her up on top of that."

She picked up a prepared bottle off the little dresser before crossing to the rocking chair in the corner. Rocking slowly back and forth, she spoke softly to Rose cradled in her arms.

"You've grown in the past couple of months," she said. "Last time I saw you was... back in June I think? I was sorry to hear about your father. He was a good man."

Rose just listened, her brown eyes big as she sucked faithfully on the bottle. The woman laughed quietly, looking her straight back at her.

"You're a trusting little girl," she said. "It's no wonder you'll follow him someday."

A soft creak from a tall wardrobe that wasn't supposed to be there, turned the woman's head. A mop of black hair on a small body, slipped out the door, and darted towards her. She looked down at the boy sternly even as she tried to hide her amusement at the sight of his innocent face.

"I thought you were supposed to stay in the Tardis?"

"I got lonely. What is that?"

She smiled a little, shifting her arms so he could see the bundle she held. "You know what it is."

"Yeah, but what is it doing here? I thought babies had to stay on Gallifrey?"

She laughed and reached over to ruffle his hair. "She's human, Theta. She lives here."

He wrinkled his nose, but he smiled still. "What's so great about humans? They're not near as smart as us."

"No but they're compassionate, courageous, and they have a great capacity to love."

"Does she have those things?"

The woman paused to consider, looking down at Rose while she spoke."Maybe not yet, but she will."

He smiled shyly, looking at the baby in a new light.

"Come here. If you sit on my lap, you can hold her."

Theta grinned even wider as he scrambled up into her lap and his eyes lit up when Rose was placed in his waiting arms. The woman left her hands to help support the baby, but she was primarily concerned with watching the boys face. He, in turn, was watching Rose with the most intent expression. His small hands curled around her, keeping him close to his body. Heavy eyelids began to droop on over her eyes, but he was still mesmerized by them. He had never felt so connected to something so tiny. She was so insignificant, just a human, not even grown, but he felt as if she were really so much more than that.

"Mother," he whispered. "Is she special?"

"What makes you think that?" the woman asked, her interest piqued.

"She just looks special."

She smiled. "Yes, she's very special?"

"Why is that?" he asked, his eyes earnestly watching her face for answers.

"It's... not a simple answer," she said. "Some people won't think she's important at all, but it only takes one person to notice, one person who can see just how special she is."

"Like you?"

"Like me, and like you." She nodded, brushing his hair lightly from his face. "We can see what she can become and we can give her the chance to grow."

"Is that why we're here?"

"No, that's for another day. We're here because it's Christmas."

"Christmas?"

"A holiday that's very important for the humans. It's her first one, but her father died just last month. We're here as a sort of present for her. Someone to watch out for her."

"A present..." he trailed off, gazing thoughtfully back at the cupboard. "May we leave a real present, not just a visit?"

She looked at him proudly, nodding quickly. "If you're quick about it. We'll have to leave soon."

"I'll be right back."

Theta scurried off to the cupboard, leaving her with Rose once again. She resumed rocking the baby, humming a quiet melody. Rose's eyes were fast falling shut, and she had long since given up the bottle. Now, she was on the verge of sleep, lulled by the woman's low swinging voice.

Not much time passed before Theta returned with a snow globe precariously held in his hands. He set it down on the dresser, inspecting the glowing galaxy and stars contained beneath the glass. He touched it lightly, and the glowing ceased, but it was still beautiful.

"Do you think she'll like it?" he asked nervously.

"I think she will."

Theta returned to the rocking chair, looking on Rose's now sleeping face. He clasped one little hand in his, and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"Goodnight," he said softly.

"And Happy Christmas," his mother added.

He looked up at her a little unsure, but nodded. "And have a Happy Christmas."

Still asleep, Rose smiled.

* * *

Some nineteen years later, Christmas Day at the Tyler's residence was anything but quiet. The Sycorax mess was the main event and dinner was loud and full of relief of being alive. The first truly quiet moment came after dinner, when Rose was sitting on her bed, fingering her old snow globe. She inspected the constellations pictured and wondered if she had been to one of them, if she ever would.

"Can I come in?" the Doctor asked, knocking on the door frame.

She looked up in surprise, her eyes staying on his unfamiliar face perhaps a second too long.

"Sure."

He sat on the edge of the bed, a careful distance away. She couldn't decide if that was a good thing or not. She idly transferred the snow globe from hand to hand, not noticing the way the Doctor's eyes followed it like a cat's.

"Did you have Christmas on Gallifrey?"

He laughed, and she felt herself shrink with embarrassment. Of course they didn't have Christmas.

"I came to Earth for Christmas. Ever since I was a little boy."

She looked at him curiously. That was new information. He _never _talked about his childhood.

"Even when you were little?"

He avoided her gaze, still looking at the globe. "My mother brought me back then. We had to be careful though. Some of the other's back home didn't like that she brought me to Earth and... there were also time-line considerations."

"What do you mean?"

He smirked to himself a little, ignoring her question. "I learned a lot though, about how to visit without compromising myself. I came every year; I didn't miss a single one."

"What are you talking about?" Rose asked, shifting towards him. "I'm so confused."

"That's all right." He grinned boyishly. "You always were."

"Doctor." She set the globe to the side, too focused now for playing idly.

The Doctor continued to disregard her curiosity, turning his attention instead to the forgotten snow globe. At his touch, the globe lit up, throwing a soft glow around the room. Rose raised her eyebrows, but assumed it was some, Time-lord trick or something.

"I had one like this once," he said, stroking the glass. "My parents gave it to me when I was a baby. I used to take it everywhere."

"What happened to it?"

"I met you," he said, smiling cryptically.

She rolled her eyes, sure every word coming out of his mouth was meant to confuse her further. She leaned her head back against the wall, shutting her eyes.

"Tired Rose?"

She nodded, leaving her eyes closed. "It happens sometimes when aliens invade Christmas day."

"Yeah, I can see that. You're really going to sleep?"

"Mm-mm."

Rose twisted around, resting her head on the pillow. She reached for a blanket, surprised when it found the Doctor's hand instead. He kept it, even when she tried to pull away. Pulling the covers up to her ears, he began to swing softly in her ear. It was a beautiful song, one she thought she knew, but couldn't quite place. Oddly, she was picturing a woman she had never met, tall and pretty, with a little boy following behind her.

"That's pretty, Doctor," Rose mumbled.

"I'm sure it is." The Doctor replied cheekily. "Goodnight, Rose."

"Night."

She was on the very edge of sleep, but she vaguely recognized as the Doctor kissed her lightly on the cheek before he got up to leave. The lights turned out and the door squeaked quietly as she slipped more fully into sleep.

"Still haven't missed a Christmas." He murmured as he left. "Thank you for that."


	56. Chapter 56: Masquerade

DISCLAIMER: MAYBE TOMORROW... BUT FOR NOW I STILL DON'T OWN DOCTOR WHO.

**A/N **_**Whewfta. It's hard getting stuff done around Christmas. I don't know how my mom gets anything done. But she does, every year.**_**Masquerade**_** by **_**Andrew Loyd Webber **_**is the song today. Just so you know, I will not be posting tomorrow, but I might get a couple of last Christmas ones up on the 26 and 27**_**. **_**It depends, but I should get at least one more up. This has really been a blast for me(the whole two chapters of it) I hope you've enjoyed it too! Merry Christmas tomorrow, thought for a lot of you it probably is tomorrow already. :-) Eh, reviews... I forgot about them, but I'll get to them soon, I promise.  
Oh, and Rose's dress that is pictured here... I can't really take credit for it. But jesidres on deviantart can. I posted a link to her picture on my profile as well as a link to Sarcastic Foxes interpretation.  
Love,  
the Management.  
Ha-ha. **_

**Masquerade**

Rose surveyed the party from the second floor balcony. The cacophony of colors and the swish of rich material was distracting to the eye, but it didn't distract from the pain in her heart. It just kept on hurting, and hurting without respite. Looking down at her dress, she regretted having custom ordered it. Tardis-blue, the sleevless gown hugged her chest before splitting at the waist to reveal panels of butter yellow. Originally, she thought it would comfort her but now she found it only made her more lonely than ever.

"You should be socializing, sweetheart," Jackie said.

Rose turned to look at her, beautiful despite the swollen belly poking out of the green satin dress. If anything, being pregnant only added to Jackie's looks, throwing a perpetual glow around her.

"I'd rather watch," Rose answered quietly.

"But it's Christmas Eve."

"It doesn't feel like it."

Rose turned away from the party, gliding to a chair she had brought up earlier. With a sigh, she sunk into its embrace, her gaze fixed on the floor.

"Rose...I know... I know you miss him, but you've got to move on," Jackie said. "That's the only way for things to finally start feeling better."

"I can't just forget him, Mum. How can I pretend that everything is fine when clearly everything is not fine?"

She gestured at her face, puffy from crying, tears lining her cheeks. Jackie stroked her face, drying off her tears with gentle fingers. She bent as best she could to press a kiss to Rose's forehead.

"You are beautiful," Jackie whispered. "You are beautiful and you are my little girl. And that is how you keep going. You think of your family and you learn to be strong for them. Someday things will get better, I promise."

Sniffling still, Rose nodded. "Thank you."

"Now come on, if you put your mask back on, no one will know you've been crying."

Rose laughed, and allowed Jackie to replace the blue mask trimmed with gold beading. She smiled, accepting her mother's warm hug before they both descended the stairs.

The bottom floor of the house was even more full of guest when Rose was trying to walk through it rather than just observe. The sheer amount of fabric in the room swallowed her whole, trying to drown her in it's lavishness. Soon, her tears evaporated and she was spinning across the floor in a flurry of blue. Her partner, a masked Mickey, kept her entertained with the latest gossip he'd picked up. Apparently, Lou Anne from Communications had recently dumped her longtime boyfriend from Foreign Engineering because he wouldn't man up and propose. Together, she and Mickey speculated the separated couple would be married by Valentine's day.

The dance ended and Rose was tempted to return to the second floor. The giddiness of the party was becoming too much once again. Catching the eye of her mother across the room, she couldn't quite bring herself to do it. Instead, she filtered among her Torchwood friends, exchanging hello's and giving hugs to those she worked closely with.

* * *

The night was long, and Christmas came without Rose even realizing it. Eventually, tired guests returned to their homes where they would fill their children's stockings. On the mantle, Rose's own stocking hung next to Jackie and Pete's. She fingered the soft fabric, admiring the red rose, stark against a snowy background. Footsteps sounded behind her, and she assumed Jackie had come to fill the stockings.

"I can help if you want, Mum. You don't have to do it by yourself."

"Of all the people I've been mistaken for, I think you just found the worst one of all."

Rose froze in her place, shocked to hear his voice. That was completely impossible. Surreptitiously, her hand sneaked to key on her necklace. It was warm to the touch, and not just because of being against her bare collarbone all night.

"I must say, your party was a success," he continued unperturbed by the fact she hadn't turned around. "I mean, the masquerade idea was great. I thought for sure you'd have seen me by now though. I suppose the tux could have thrown you off. Converses though? How many people do you know that wear converses with their tux? And the mask... I wore this one at that fancy ball we went to back in the... what was it, 1600's?"

"You're babbling," Rose said, not trusting her voice with anything above a whisper.

She could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke, "And you're not turning around. It's quite a shame actually, I wanted to see the front of that dress again. The Tardis will be pleased."

"How long have you been here?"

"Assuming I'm really here and not an illusion, I've been here most of the night. I meant to come upstairs, but when I finally went to go, you and your mum were coming down."

Rose laughed, but it was shaky and her grip on the mantle showed how nervous she was. "I should have cried a little longer then. I'll keep that in mind for next time."

The Doctor shifted closer until she could feel the heat off his body. She inhaled sharply, her knees knocking beneath layers of fabric.

"Next time you won't have to cry on your own."

"And why is that?" Rose murmured.

"Turn around, Rose."

Trembling, she moved slowly around, bringing her eyes up from the floor to rest on his face. The minute their eyes met, his face opened into a smile longer than the Cardiff rift. She pressed a hand to her mouth, tears slowly rolling down her cheeks. He had found her.

"Hello," the Doctor said.

"Hello" she whispered.

"Look at us" he said, smiling through tears of his own. "All this time, and we can only manage a hello?"

"We had a whole conversation before."  
"You were in denial; it doesn't count."

She grinned, touching the hand he raised to her cheek. "I'm _still_ in denial. It happens sometimes when impossible things happen."

"I don't suppose kissing happens after impossible things?"

Rose laughed, taking a step closer. "I think you might be in luck."


	57. Chapter 57: Maybe

DISCLAIMER: NOPE, NOPE, NOPE. NOT MINE.

**A/N **_**Sorry, I meant to have this earlier. I actually had it 5/8 done yesterday, but then my laptop was stuck with my friend until this morning. It was seriously frustrating last night, when I really wanted to finish but I couldn't. For your entertainment today we've got**_** Ma****ybe**_** b**__**y **_**Secondhand Serenade.**_** My first Doctor Who mistletoe story, which is quite surprising considering how convenient of a plot device it is. Please enjoy! Oh and a New Year's story? Yes? No? I'm still deciding. **_

**Maybe**_**  
**_

Rose was hard at work, ingredients spread all across the counter space and her face splatter with flour. Christmas music played on the radio, and a sprig of mistletoe hung over the doorway. Baking sugar cookies was a favorite memory of hers, but with her Mum in town for a few last minute gifts, Rose was having a terrible time of it.

"What happened here?" The Doctor asked as he surveyed the growing mess.

Rose turned around, looking at him casually leaning against the doorway. He had abandoned his suit jacket sometime earlier, and wore only a light green button-up shirt, the sleeves rolled just below the elbows. His hair, still wet from a shower, only added to the stunning picture. Really, she should never let herself look at him, because she always ended up staring far longer than she meant to.

"I'm baking," Rose finally answered.

"I see," his voice was full of amusement which she found a tiny bit offending.

"Think you could do any better?"

He laughed. "Oh, I'm sure I could. But this is much more entertaining."

With a humph, Rose returned to her disastrous work. Not long into rolling the dough, a hand fell on her shoulder as the Doctor peeked around her. She turned to look him, a little startled at how close that put their faces. A couple inches more and they'd be touching noses.

"Do we get to cut them into shapes now?" The Doctor said, his eyes sparkling like a little boy's.

Rose eyed him warily, worried what strange shapes he had in mind.

"Yeah, let me even it out a bit more, then we can cut them out."

"I haven't made cookies in ages!"

She couldn't help rolling her eyes. They had made cookies last year when they visited and at valentine's day as well. But if his definition of ages, was a couple of months ago, she supposed it was okay. She finished rolling the dough, brushing the loose flour off her hands when she had finished.

"Here, I'll get the cookie cutters out."

"No need," the Doctor proudly proclaimed.

"What do you mean no need?" Rose asked.

He whipped out his sonic screwdriver, grinning like Father Christmas. He fiddled with the settings a moment, before putting it at the outer edge of the dough.

"Watch this one, Rose."

Holding the button down, he traced out a rough Tardis shape, the dough automatically cutting where the light went. When he finished, he looked to Rose for approval.

She shook her head, mirth lighting her face. "Say we run into a alien made of cookie dough..."

He grinned widely, flipping the screwdriver on his fingers. "I can deal with that one right on the spot."

* * *

A little more than an hour, the kitchen was bomb site. At the Doctor's insistence, Rose had made two more batches of dough which made at least four dozen extra cookies floating around. The flour now made the largest dry lake known to man, and it clung to Rose's hair and clothing like a child to it's mother. Meanwhile, the doctor remained largely unscathed, except for the handful of flour that had made it in his hair thanks to Rose. At least they had plenty of cookies.

"I think perhaps, the rest of your clothes require some flour accents," the Doctor taunted.

He danced towards the doorway, a cup of flour in his hand.

"Don't you dare! I'll bleach your suit and turn all your whites pink."

"That's easy enough to prevent, I'll do my own laundry. Excuse me, while I decorate your clothing."

"Doctor!"

Rose caught his arm just at the door way, tugging him back. He, of course, dumped the flour over her head instead. She tried so hard to be upset, but she only managed a laugh in response. Only when her ribs stopped hurting did she notice the Doctor had turned thoughtful.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Do you follow all the Christmas traditions."

She shrugged, not really following. "Sure, the ones I know."

He looked away, before slowly pointing up. "Even that one?"

Rose followed his finger with her eyes, locking onto the mistletoe overhead. Her heart rate doubled as her gaze flew immediately to his. He was watching her intently, but a little curious. Clearly, he was waiting for her decision.

"Do you want to?" Rose asked and instantly grimaced. She should not have said that. She should have just laughed it off, played it cool. At the very least, she could have just given him a teasing peck on the lips.

He rubbed the back of his neck, and Rose felt even more stupid. Now they were both uncomfortable.

"Don't you?" the Doctor eventually replied.

Rose was taken aback. Had he really just implied he wanted to kiss her? Or was he just surprised she didn't follow up on tradition?

"I, mean, it's just... and I—oh never mind." He stopped talking and instead he just looked at her, which was almost worse. She was grateful for the flour hiding the blush rising to her cheeks. However, the Doctor was not so lucky. His cheeks were burning, something she hadn't really seen before. It made her face even warmer than before.

"It doesn't have to mean anything," Rose said slowly. "It's just... tradition."

"Right," he agreed. "Tradition."

He reached out slowly, holding her head in his hands. His fingers were so gentle, she almost felt like a wisp of wind about to float away. He looked her in the eyes as his head lowered, waiting for her to pull away. She steadfastly held her ground, closing her eyes at last minute. When his lips finally met hers, it was anything but tradition. Sweet and bold all at once, his lips were a mystery, a puzzle she was putting together. She half expected him to pull away when it deepened, but he just kept kissing, and kissing. Left up to him, they probably could have kissed straight through six regenerations. Rose, on the other hand, required a little time to process and it helped to breathe as well.

"Maybe..." he started, watching her face carefully. "It might be more than just tradition."

Rose didn't answer right away, thinking about it for a moment. Kissing was a rather distracting activity, but he made a sound point. Maybe it was more than tradition, more than an accident. Perhaps they were two people tied more closely than strands of DNA, which ought to give them the right to love openly instead of pretending it didn't matter. It always mattered. Every touch of the hands, every smile, it always meant so much more.

"Maybe you're right," she replied hesitantly.

The door flew open with a flurry of cold air and snowflakes. Jackie stumbled in with packages falling off her arms.

"Oh Rose, you'll never guess who I-" she stopped mid-sentence.

The Doctor dropped his hands the moment the door opened, but they were standing unusually close, their cheeks redder than holly berries. Rose watched Jackie's eyes flick between the two of them and then up to the innocent sprig of mistletoe. It was pretty obvious what was going just moments before she got there.

"Here, Rose," the Doctor said, his voice painfully awkward. "Let me help with that flour."

He proceeded to dust off her face, smiling especially wide when he brushed flour of her nose.

"Thanks," She replied. "Let me get yours."

"I don't have any," he said, busily ignoring the stunned stare of Jackie.

Rose laughed, pointing to his head. "I think you missed a spot."

He reached slow hand up to his hair, glaring at her, when his hand came away white.

"Rose Tyler," he growled.

She smiled, and brushed flour from around his lips. "You also seemed to have picked some up when we... um..." Her eyes flicked to Jackie as if remembering her presence for the first time.

"Right." He was in no hurry to suffer under Jackie's hand again.

Jackie stared at them in apparent horror, the packages all but forgotten. Rose could only imagine the thoughts running through her head.

"We made cookies, Mum," Rose said.

"Yes... I can see that."

"Actually," the Doctor began. "your can probably smell them, as there are no cookies to be seen just now."

Rose rolled her eyes. "Thanks Doctor. We never would have guessed."

"Anything else I should know about?" Jackie asked, clearly dreading the answer.

Rose and the Doctor shared a conspiratorial look. Not a word or motion passed between them, but it was obvious what their answer was going to be.

"Not really," Rose replied casually. "We did make a bit of a mess in the kitchen though."

"I think I should take that mistletoe down; it only gets in the way." Jackie hurried off, bags and all, laughter following her all the way to her room.

"What shall we do now?" Rose whispered.

The Doctor smiled his secret smile at her, the one that always proceeded trouble. "I know this place, absolutely beautiful. Most common plant: Mistletoe."

He grinned down at her, making her insides feel warm and fuzzy. She hoped her return smile inspired the same feeling in him. Cheeks pinking and eyes sparkling, Rose took his proffered hand.

"I think I'd like that.".


	58. Chapter 58: Meant to Live

DISCLAIMER: IF I OWNED IT, I WOULDN'T BE WRITING FANFICTION... MOST LIKELY

**A/N**_** Well New Year's came and went and you clearly didn't get a chapter. That would be due to an untimely illness. Not that I've been sick all that time... no, the extended delay is thanks to a busy, hectic schedule, and a boy who requires way to much thinking. I'm not even dating him, and I worry about it **_**all the time**_**. Yeah, frustrating. **_

_**The song is **_**Meant to Live**_** by **_**Switchfoot****, **_** though I've never actually heard the song. It wasn't really my prompt either. I wrote this and wanted to put it in, so I had to adjust songs. **_

_**Sad, unexpected and hopefully the first of some regular updates. I guess we'll have to wait and see. I should probably get Assassinations done at some point too. Oh and let's not even touch my poor Harry Potter story straggling in the year-long distance. Wow, I sound really uncommitted like one of those abandoner types. I promise I'm really not. I once made a goal to finish all fanfic projects and I intend to do so. **_

_**Anyway, please enjoy!**_

**Meant to Live**

He reaches out a hand, touching the single pane of glass that separates them. She presses her hand against it as well, staring mournfully back at him. She's barely holding back tears, and it breaks his heart. They're only inches away, but that might as well have been oceans. He can hardly meet her eyes, not when he knows what will come next.

"Why?" she whispers. Her voice is distorted by the glass or maybe by the pain already starting to tear at him. It's only a matter of time.

"For you."

She shakes her head. "I didn't ask for this."

"You didn't have to."

"But I don't want this; I don't want to lose you."

"Too late."

"Please."

"I can't, the radiation is all ready setting in."

"You promised."

"Sometimes I lie."

She watches him with those big brown eyes, so full of tears he's not sure she can even see him. He doesn't want her to see, and he doesn't want her to watch his face as the world falls apart. How did he come to mean so much to her?

"You've got to leave now," he says,swallowing a grunt of pain as the radiation stabs deeper into him.

"I don't want to leave you alone. No one should die alone."

"Some people deserve it."

"Not you... you don't deserve to die at all."

"I deserve it more than anyone else."

"That's not true. You're the kindest person I've ever met."

"Thank you."

He hangs his head as the pain escalates. He can barely stand, but he won't let her see. He won't hurt her more than she has to be. She see it anyways. He can tell by the way her tears flow faster and the way she crumbles to her knees. He collapses beside her, leaning against the glass for support.

"Don't leave me here alone," her voice is small and scared. "I'm begging you."

"You've got a whole lifetime ahead of you," he pauses, clenching his fists tightly. "I've got several behind me."

"I don't want it. I don't want a life without you."

"Don't say that. Please don't say that."

"But it's true."

"Don't let me die in vain. If I'm going to die for you, the least you can do is live for me."

"But I love you."

"Doesn't matter. You've got to move on."

"That's not fair."

"None of this is fair."

Her hand is against the glass again, quivering in time with her shoulders. He barely has the strength to lift his hand to meet hers. At least it distracts from the overwhelming desire to scream.

"Don't go." She pleads one last time.

He can't form a reply without releasing a cry of agony. So he watches and touches her hand through glass. If only he had more time... if only he were meant to live.


	59. Chapter 59: Memories

DISCLAIMER: BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. SOMETHING ABOUT NOT OWNING IT.

**A/N_ The song is _Memories _by _Elvis Presley. _Yeah, how cool is that? Elvis made the list! Anyway, sorry for the slight delay. I've been busier than ever recently and still having boy distractions of multiple varieties... I've got a total mood swing going as far as that's concerned and it's literally driving me up the wall. Yeah..._**

_**Moving on, this one's, eh, this one's different. Let's just say that. It's longer than the last few though, so I hope you appreciate it. I didn't have enough time to really look over it, so if there's more mistakes than usual, sorry about that. I'll answer reviews another day.  
**_

**Memories**

The minute the shock from dimension jumping wore off, Rose knew she was in the wrong place. The air was unsettled and rich with the smell of impending doom. It weighed heavy on her chest, pressing at her insistently, battering her with it's total wrongness.

As if that wasn't enough, the dark blue of the night sky was lit by eerie green lights behind dark clouds. Shots of purple darted across the horizon, reaching sickly fingers towards the building silhouettes. She shivered at the sight of the skeletal buildings, bombed out and smoking in the rain pouring down. Her hair was fast taking on more water than it could hold, and streams of rain slipped down the strands and onto her slick blue jacket. She examined a single drop on the pad of her finger. It wasn't acidic, and yet the smoky green color was hardly comforting. This was definitely not the London she knew.

A scream split the air like ink on a blank page, and Rose finally became aware of the distant gunfire, the thunder of bombs...and the bodies. Bodies heaped in piles or thrown carelessly on the streets. She turned away, but she couldn't hide from the ghastly sight. At every turn, there was another stone cold face, another pair of unseeing eyes. She stumbled backwards, horror pushing at the back of her throat, acrid as bile.

Desperate, she fumbled to activate the dimension jumper.

Click. Stall. Nothing.

Thirty minute recharge time.

She was trapped in the fatalistic world for another half hour. She shut her eyes against the gore surrounding her, but the images were burned in her mind. The faces, pale and bloody, flashed in her mind until she could identify individuals. The lovers, still holding hands. The cabbie, clutching a letter in his portly fingers.

The blast of a bomb and the inevitable screams to follow tore her away from the ghostly faces, and she was filled with a twisted sort of relief. The sound of pain and death was so much easier than the constant sight of it. The screams of the dying were much closer now and she began to worry about her own safety.

She didn't dare open her eyes to run; she couldn't bring herself to look at the destruction again. Instead, she edged down the street as fast as her probing feet could carry her. Her tentative steps let her know whenever there was an obstacle, human or otherwise. Every once and a while she overstepped herself. That's when the tears would fall harder than the rain still beating down.

Pounding feet soon could be heard amongst the cacophony of screaming. People were filling the street, pushing past Rose and knocking her back and forth in their haste to retreat. The sound of bombs remained a safe distance, but a new sound was entering the scene. Sharp and stabbing, it was the sound of gunfire and other unidentifiable hand weapons. Shots were always accompanied by shouts of fear and one shout more beastly, more chilling, a death cry heard on the last breath.

Survival instinct hit it's peak and Rose's eyes flew open again. Legs pumping, she jostled for a position in the crowd, preferably one that kept her out of range. Panic was evident in the glassy eyes of strangers as they ran like deer across a busy highway. And like deer, some didn't make it. To her right, a woman collapsed to her knees, blood spreading in a slow deliberate circle.

Rose turned only to accidentally meet the woman's eyes, so frightened and creased with pain. Rose knew if she stopped, she probably wouldn't make it out alive. But the woman was so scared, so utterly alone. She slowed, reaching out to take the woman's hand.

The woman's fingers trembled in her grasp, but they tightened around the humanity.

"I'm sorry," Rose whispered.

"They're coming."

"Don't be afraid." Rose's hand was tender on the woman's head, softly smoothing back the hair slick with grease and blood.

"They're coming."

The repetition plunged like an icy knife into her and Rose felt frozen with an undeniable feeling of dread. The urge to run again slapped her in the face, strong and overwhelming. Only the woman's hand still tightly clenched in her own, kept Rose from sprinting away. As if realizing this at the same time, the women abruptly dropped her hand.

"They're coming!"

Her voice was earnest and crazed. Though the words were the same, the intention was clear.

Run.

Rose threw her one last sorrowful look even as her feet fell into a familiar rhythm. The pavement smacked underfoot, the air thrummed with violence, but above it all, a voice caught in her ears. It was loud and insistent, incredibly close. It took only a moment to realize what set it apart from the other voices. It was one moment too long.

The bullets clattered but Rose was safe, trapped in the arms of a stranger. The pavement dug painfully into her back, but the weight pressing against her was warm and strong. In the cloistering smells of death and decay, his scent was like apple blossoms in the spring. Her eyes sprung open as the scent stirred her memories of another world, another man.

To her surprise, the eyes of her memories were the same eyes that now held her gaze.

The man stood hastily, simultaneously pulling Rose to her feet. He tugged at her hand as he tried to run, but she too shocked to move. Her eyes roved over his slender body. Dressed in a blue jeans and a t-shirt, his outfit was foreign except for the worn out converses on his feet. But his face. His face was anything but foreign. Tears teased at her eyes when she looked at his ageless brown eyes and his face lined with the memory of laughter and the reality of agony.

"C'mon," he said. "We've got to get out of here."

She wanted to stay and stare at him forever, but she knew he was right. He had saved her life once; there was no guarantee it would work again. Hands clasped, they ran without stopping until they outstripped the noise and the people. Breathing hard, she braced herself against a weary building, her eyes still fixed on him. He turned slowly, noticing for the first time how intently she regarded him.

"Doctor." The word fell like a prayer from her lips.

"Sorry... do I know you?"

She shook her head silently, holding a hand to her mouth in an attempt to keep the weeping sounds at bay. It didn't stop the sniffling of her nose though.

"Oh." He looked at her closely, his face a perfect picture of confusion's first meeting with curiosity. "Is this one of my future, your past sort of things."

"No." The word was strangled as it left her throat, catching on the needled thorns of her tears.

He stepped towards her, touching light fingers to her cheek where the tears left crystal paths. It was disconcerting how similar his touch felt, but so vastly different. She wasn't sure whether she should be rejoicing in his touch or recoiling from it. He pulled away before she could make a conscious decision,but he stayed relatively close so that their body heat collected around them.

"I'm not going to hurt you,"

She blinked, taken aback.

"I know that."

"Do you now?"

Rose nodded, suddenly nervous.

"I know you very well."

"You want to tell me how?"

"No."

"Fair enough." The Doctor watched her with careful eyes, gauging how far he can push her. Given the tears, and her her strangely fragile voice, he didn't dare fish for information just yet.

Rose slid down the buildings charcoal side, shutting her eyes against the face that haunted her dreams and now her waking world as well. It seemed too harsh, too cruel that she should endure Fate's humor in such a way.

The Doctor sat down beside her, his knee brushing against hers. When his shoulder bumped her, she opened her eyes and looked at him once again.

"That was brave of you to stop for that woman."

"You saw?"

He smiled that smile Rose knew meant he was proud of her. It lightened her heavy heart just enough to shatter her frown.

"I haven't seen that kind of concern since the war started."

She wanted to ask about the war, the bombs, the death, but she was afraid of what the answer might be. So she just nodded like she understood what he was saying.

"She needed a hand to hold."

She couldn't help but notice the way his eyes flicked to her hands, knotted and white in her lap. She didn't want to admit it, but her eyes found his hands just as quickly.

"A lot of people need a hand to hold."

"You most of all," Rose reminded.

When he smiled again, it was lonely and sad and she regretted saying anything. He didn't need her to tell him something he had known throughout his impossibly long life. And still for his pain, he looked at Rose... like he was grateful.

"Yes. And I think that perhaps you were one to give me a hand to hold."

She ducked her head, letting her hair fall in her face. She didn't expect him to tuck it gently behind her ear or to feel his hand wrap around hers.

"Thank you," he said, squeezing her hand.

"I didn't do anything," Rose whispered. "I don't even know you."

He laughed a small, quiet laugh while examining her fingers locked with his.

"You said it yourself, you know me very well."

"I know... I don't know what or who I know anymore."

The Doctor nodded with gentle understanding. "Maybe we can learn together?"

Expectant, the Doctor met her gaze, asking a silent question she had answered once before. Come with me? It broke her heart, knowing she had to answer anything but yes.

"I can't."

"Time lines, I suppose," he murmured sadly.

"Parallel worlds, actually."

His eyes widened but that was the most his surprise showed through.

"He's lucky to have you, the other me."

Rose's heart split into harsh uneven shards, as his words pierced into her very soul. She flinched and his hand tightened instinctively around hers.

"I haven't seen him in almost three years. I'm still trying to find him."

"I'm sorry."

She remained silent, but her head fell on his shoulder as a few tears strayed down her cheeks. The Doctor's arms wrapped around her and held her close in the darkness. A soft beeping drew their combined attention to the watch on her wrist.

"Thirty minutes," she said softly.

"Thirty minutes for what?" He asked

"Thirty minutes recharging time." She took the dimension jumper in her hands, shifting it back and forth. "I can go home now."

Rose stood abruptly, fighting off the many emotions that launched an assault against her. The Doctor followed suit, catching her hand once more.

"But I don't even know your name."

She smiled warmly. "Rose Tyler."

He grinned and dipped his head. "Nice to meet you Rose Tyler."

She took only a few more minutes to leave, straightening her jacket and offering a heartfelt goodbye to the Doctor. And just before parting, she sweetly kissed his cheek.

The Doctor watched her go, as sadness and longing filled his hearts. But in spite of that and in spite of all the destruction, he was hopeful. Because he knew a name, and somewhere in this world, there was a girl with this name. A girl, who he would remember before ever meeting her, a girl he would spend his whole life treasuring the memories she had given to him.


	60. Chapter 60: Meteor Shower

DISCLAIMER: I'D PROBABLY FAIL AT WRITING AT SCRIPTS, SO IT'S BEST IF I DON'T OWN IT.

**A/N**_** The song is **_**Me****teor ****Shower **_**by **_**Owl City. **_**I kind of struggled with this one initially, but I think I finally found the right rhythm by the end. Sorry, for the long wait. However, I have like this fancy schedule set up for my all my time and activities now, and the result is, I think I'm going to be a writing a lot more for the remainder of my summer. We'll see if this really will be the case, but I think it might just work. I updated Assassinations yesterday and now this one today, so that shows some real improvement. :-) **_

_**Encouragement would be really appreciated and also any suggestions for coming chapters. I know a lot writers get stuck in a rut of style and plot type things, and I feel like I do that too. So any requests or critique would be really helpful, I think, in keeping things fresh and original. Because I don't want to bore myself with writing anymore than you want to be bored reading. Thanks and Enjoy!**_

**Meteor Shower**

The Doctor quietly slipped from beneath the sheets, carefully watching Rose's face as he pulled on a fresh shirt. At three in the morning, he took great care not to wake her. Still, he couldn't resist tenderly brushing her cheek and kissing the crown of her head. She sighed softly in sleep, bringing a smile to his face.

He took the door across the hallway, entering into a room dimly lit by a rotating night light. Shooting stars and glowing nebulae played across the nursery, catching on crib bars and half-built inventions in the corner. Sitting up in bed, Luka's eyes reflected the light, glowing with anticipation.

"Can we go, Daddy?" The small boy scooted to the very end of his bed, staring expectantly at his father.

The Doctor grinned, ruffling Luka's sandy brown hair, messy as always. "We can go, so long as you're quiet. We don't want to wake Mum."

Luka dutifully shook his head, but he giggled with delight as they walked down the hall. The Doctor shushed him now and again, but secretly enjoyed his enthusiasm. Hand in hand, they ventured from the Tardis and into a warm summer night.

* * *

Rose woke, feeling vaguely disoriented by the empty space next to her. The sheets still held an imprint of warmth, an echo of the Doctor's presence. Groggily eying the clock, she stretched out of bed and crossed to the open doorway.

"Doctor?" she called softly.

No answer came except for the whisper of the open nursery door. She crossed the hall, fully expecting to see the Doctor sitting at their's son's beside, coaxing him back to sleep. The unslept in bed and the absence of Luka's favorite sneakers told her the Doctor had taken him for yet another midnight adventure.

Shaking her head, she continued down the hall to the main console room. Cracking the door open, she glanced out the grassy plain. A short distance away, the Doctor turned back to smile at her. Luka sat in total awe at his side, his eyes locked on the sky dancing with meteors. A warm outpouring of love wrapped around her as she walked towards them. The Doctor immediately took her hand in his, his thumb rubbing small circles on her skin.

"Couldn't stay away?" he asked.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"It's fantastic, Mum!" Luka cried, leaning into her side. "I could stay out all night."

"Knowing Dad, you probably will," Rose said.

"It was his idea, you know," the Doctor said. "He picked out the day and everything."

"It's beautiful Luka; You chose a good night."

* * *

Later, long after Luka had fallen asleep in Rose's lap, the Doctor and Rose watched as the last of the meteors painted the sky. Dawn was just around the corner, making it harder and harder to see the streaks of light. A light breeze tickled their faces and blew Rose's hair into his face. He reached for a strand, letting it fall through his fingers before picking up another. Her eyes were half lidded with sleep, and he found himself studying her long lashes with idle curiosity.

"Luka really loved it," Rose said, her voice betraying the sleep she was putting off. "I'm glad you brought him."

"It wasn't any trouble," the Doctor murmured in her ear, caressing the skin with his lips. "I'm glad you joined us."

"Me too."

"Do you remember the last time we watched a meteor shower?"

She laughed a little and he liked the way he could feel it where their bodies connected.

"It was on our honey moon," she said and he nodded.

"You couldn't believe how bright the stars were that night."

"And you spilled champagne all over."

"Did I?" he found himself laughing along with her, the sounds falling into perfect harmony after all the time they'd been together.

"You did and I had to buy new shoes!"

"Oh, that's right. You were wearing those white flats with a rose on the toe. I stained the rose's red."

"How artistic of you."

He grinned. "Oh, yes. I planned that spill on purpose you know."

"Of course you did," her laughter was settling into a quieter rhythm now, a thoughtful sound. "We had no idea what we were doing then."

The Doctor half laughed at that. "We still don't know what we're doing."

"I think we're doing pretty well. Just look at you with Luka, you're a wonderful father."

He fell silent, considering this. He had never once expected to be a father, certainly not when he first took Rose's hand in that basement so long ago. Even now, looking at his own son, it was so hard to believe in the reality of it all. He had given up any thought of family when he lost his kind, now he would give up anything to keep this family he held so dear.

"Doctor?"

"Just thinking... it still feels so unreal sometimes," he whispered.

"Does this feel unreal?" Rose asked, touching her lips to his.

"No." His voice was lighter than breath, slipping away from him without conscious thought. "No, you're real."

"And this?" She guided his hand to Luka, his downy hair and then to his small face. The Doctor closed his eyes, savoring the undeniably tangible feel of his child.

"Real."

"We're not going anywhere, Doctor."

He opened his eyes once more, taking in the beautiful sight that was his best friend, his love, his Rose. She looked back at him with that sweet gaze of hers, so loving and understanding. He cupped her face in his hand knowing without a doubt that this was the life he wanted. Of all the possible futures he had seen, all that is, all that was and all that ever could be, he knew he had found the best one of all.


	61. Chapter 61: Miracle

DISCLAIMER: NOPE, IT HASN'T CHANGED. STILL DON'T OWN IT...

**A/N**_** Okay, okay. I know I missed my yearly Christmas chapters. First of all, I am sooo sorry. I wanted to get them done, I really did. I missed writing them more than you did reading them I'm sure. Second of all, I'll make it up sometime and have Christmas in July or something. Third, I hope you will like this chapter, regardless of the wait. It's a little odd, I think, but it was fun to write and play with imagery and symbolism a bit. The song is **_**Miracle **_**by **_**Vertical Horizon. **_**Merry Belated Christmas and Happy New Year!**_

**Miracle**

_But he's not you... It's still not right... I came all that way to find you... the Doctor's still you. _In the long hours of the night, these are the words that haunted the most, the words driven like nails into his very soul. Did he indeed have a soul? Is a meta-crisis worthy of such a thing? The wire in his shaking hands certainly didn't seem to think so. Shimmering gold, it mocked his pain and confusion, glittering regardless of the clumsy hands that couldn't remember what to do. Shards of glass, the last remnants of the lamp's shattered life, hid behind shreds of scattered metal, taken forcefully from the toaster and the laptop lay vulnerable with all covering stripped from it, it's inner workings painfully displayed. All around him, lay broken pieces, scattered memories, scraps that didn't have a home.

He reached for a memory chip, slicing his finger on a hidden slip of glass. Heedless of the stabbing pain, he continued his work, blood dripping onto the sheets of metal, painting a lonely portrait on his dim reflection. Faster, his fingers flew, flaying wires, snapping circuits and burning skin on stinging electricity. For all his efforts, nothing followed it's intended course. Brittle metal snapped unexpectedly, trembling hands, too big for their job, spoiled intricate work. What took hours to make, crumbled in few short seconds and crazed frustration blew fuses faster than calming breaths could cure them.

Sparks lit the cotton of his shirt sleeve, biting his skin in fiery jowls. Mumbling strings of phrases that didn't belong together, he forced them out without even second glance at his angry red burns. Still muttering low, he took to the fractured mess with greater ferocity, never realizing the memory of Rose's words had become a bitter mantra thrown like curses into the dark apartment.

Another cut across the palm, and he hurled the offending scrap away, scowling when it smashed against the photo on the wall. Together they plunged to the unforgiving floor in a shriek of broken glass. He picked up the broken frame, smearing blood across the smiling faces. Anger caught in his throat, forcing tears where injury could not. Cold metal of the frame, bent beyond repair, and now the photo, stained beyond recognition. He couldn't even remember the day it had been taken, the occasion to have procured such happiness worth capturing. It was all gone now, joining the hazy remains of the rest of his life.

He pulled at the metal, trying to bend it back to it's whole, untainted memory. But it was unyielding under his hand, refusing any persuasion. The picture tore in tandem with his heart, falling like a dead man to the floor.

"Mend!" he cried uselessly, hating how helpless he felt. "Mend you blasted thing!"

Broken and lost, he sunk to the floor, catching his head in his hands, making a blood bathed mess of his hair. Great shuddering sobs stole over his body, attacking his ribs and chest with violent battering.

"Doctor?" A quiet, frightened voice from the bedroom fought through the sound of his madness, but driving it deeper as well. This voice owned the hateful words, those poisonous vipers biting at his nonexistent soul. "What's happened?"

"It won't mend," he whispered, the words barely making it through his clenched jaw. "Nothing will mend. It's all broken."

A soft hand fell on his, tugging it away from his face. He recoiled, hissing in pain.

"Here, let me see," she soothed, pulling more gently at his hands. Like a child, he followed in blind obedience, allowing his fingers to open under her ministrations. Cuts and burns marked his battle wounds, fresh and inflamed. She sighed sadly, doing the best to catch the blood with the bottom of her shirt- his shirt- she was wearing _his_ shirt and nothing else. It surprised him, like a ray of light in the darkness. Why couldn't he seem to remember? Or think at all for that matter...

"You've got to be more careful." Her voice was a lullaby, caressing his fragile mind and reminding him of happy memories he had clothed in despair.

His eyes, starved of all things beautiful, sought for her face, relearning every detail as if for the first time. When her eyes finally rose from mangled his hands, his tears started again in earnest. He looked into her eyes and found in their reflection his own splintered soul. In a rush, clarity was restored and he cried even harder for the return of sanity.

"Rose," carried on his breath, her name fell like a plea. Understanding lit in her face and she pulled him into a safe embrace. This wasn't the first time he had lost himself and it wouldn't be the last, but no matter how many times it took, how many broken photographs, how many sleepless nights ending in a blood stained shirt, she would stand by him. What he couldn't seem to mend, her capable hands always did. He breathed in her scent, subtle and warm with familiarity, feeling peace being restored. His own sweet miracle, her tender care was all he needed to remind him of his own identity. He was the Doctor, ancient and wise, but still so vulnerable inside. But most important of all, he was hers and she was his. Doctor and Rose, two different hearts, beating together, for one beautiful life.


End file.
